I honestly don't know/

[Amin]

There are two people in my life right now that have, I don't know if it's tempoary, or permanent, are out of my life. I long for them so much to be back on my life that it hurts. In both situations it's kind of touchy, so i don't say anything. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle these longings of mine.

 

[Terri]

Hi Amin,

I understand the pain of longing to be with someone that you can't be with.

One way I have tried to handle it is to pray for the person everytime the deep longing starts. I pray that God blesses them in everyway possible and pray for specific things for them that I think would make their life better. I find by taking the focus off of myself, off of my pain and longing and putting the focus on them and praying for them I do much better. And have found that the longing has decreased over time as I have continued to do this.

Also just in general it helps to keep the focus off of myself as much as possible. There are so many people that are lonely and could use a friend or just a helping hand. Find some people that you can help, even if it's just a simple thing like calling them on the phone to say hi.

Just a couple of things that have helped me Amin. Hope they help you some.

 

[Amin]

Hi Amin,

I understand the pain of longing to be with someone that you can't be with.

One way I have tried to handle it is to pray for the person everytime the deep longing starts. I pray that God blesses them in everyway possible and pray for specific things for them that I think would make their life better. I find by taking the focus off of myself, off of my pain and longing and putting the focus on them and praying for them I do much better. And have found that the longing has decreased over time as I have continued to do this.

Also just in general it helps to keep the focus off of myself as much as possible. There are so many people that are lonely and could use a friend or just a helping hand. Find some people that you can help, even if it's just a simple thing like calling them on the phone to say hi.

Just a couple of things that have helped me Amin. Hope they help you some.

Hi Terri,
Thanks, I can sure give it a try. It surely can't hurt.
Chuck.

 

[Onlythingavailable]

Life is constantly changing, but change isn't automatically bad. You didn't elaborate on what happened, but it's only natural that you feel a longing for your friends. This will pass in time, as long as you don't get hung up on these feelings. Remember that just as life moves on, so should you. This doesn't mean you should forget your friends, but that you need to continue living your life as well. I suppose I'm only saying "it will be ok", but time does usually heal wounds like these.

 

[Amin]

Life is constantly changing, but change isn't automatically bad. You didn't elaborate on what happened, but it's only natural that you feel a longing for your friends. This will pass in time, as long as you don't get hung up on these feelings. Remember that just as life moves on, so should you. This doesn't mean you should forget your friends, but that you need to continue living your life as well. I suppose I'm only saying "it will be ok", but time does usually heal wounds like these.

Hi,
I know you're right. I agree with you 100%. My problem is, I don't want to let go. They mean quite a bit.
Chcuk.

 

[EverydayPatron]

There are two people in my life right now that have, I don't know if it's tempoary, or permanent, are out of my life. I long for them so much to be back on my life that it hurts. In both situations it's kind of touchy, so i don't say anything. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle these longings of mine.

It's always difficult losing people in your life that you've spent so much time with. But the way I see it, if they were ever truly your friends, you should be able to forgive each other for momentary lapses in judgment that shouldn't determine who you really are. This is a personal situation, and if you don't feel like elaborating, it's alright. But if you ever feel like talking, don't hesitate to message me.

Hoping for the best~

 

[Amin]

It's always difficult losing people in your life that you've spent so much time with. But the way I see it, if they were ever truly your friends, you should be able to forgive each other for momentary lapses in judgment that shouldn't determine who you really are. This is a personal situation, and if you don't feel like elaborating, it's alright. But if you ever feel like talking, don't hesitate to message me.

Hoping for the best~

Thanks everyone, I appreciate your input. Chuck.

 

[EverydayPatron]

Thanks everyone, I appreciate your input. Chuck.

Anytime.

 

[Onlythingavailable]

You say you don't want to let them go, but you don't really have them at the moment, you only have the hope of them returning. The memory of them could become something you measure everything with, and since "time goldens memories" nothing could ever live up to it. This could stop your personal development, and make it harder for God to move in your life. And even if they come back, you might find that not even they measure up to your memory, which could make you very bitter. This is just based on my personal experience, so it may not be the same for you, but I don't see how clinging to a memory or a possibility like this could do any good. God has a plan for you, and whatever it is, it is much better than what any friends have to offer. Search for God and His will, and you will be all right.

P.S I don't know how long ago this happened, and since everyone mourns differently, you might just want to give yourself more time. Praying will certainly help, though.

 

[Amin]

You say you don't want to let them go, but you don't really have them at the moment, you only have the hope of them returning. The memory of them could become something you measure everything with, and since "time goldens memories" nothing could ever live up to it. This could stop your personal development, and make it harder for God to move in your life. And even if they come back, you might find that not even they measure up to your memory, which could make you very bitter. This is just based on my personal experience, so it may not be the same for you, but I don't see how clinging to a memory or a possibility like this could do any good. God has a plan for you, and whatever it is, it is much better than what any friends have to offer. Search for God and His will, and you will be all right.

P.S I don't know how long ago this happened, and since everyone mourns differently, you might just want to give yourself more time. Praying will certainly help, though.

Thanks everyone,
You've all given good advice, I'll try to put it into practice.
Chuck.