I Have Questions...

[Msj2001]

Hello,

I posted something about my situation not too long ago. I am still hurting that my situation caused me to lose my job, house, childrens father at the same time.

None the less, what questions I have is this:

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him? Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance? Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?
2. How do we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but still live a life of sin? If you're not having sex and not treating people bad, we are still being punished for our thoughts and maybe actions...
3. Is God really in control of everything? When things like a breakup or homelessness arise, how does God get the glory when He decides to turn it around?
4. If we repent of the sins we know and maybe dont know, why do we have to suffer the consequences of them?

These questions have allowed me to take a step back on God, my faith. I am more confused and more hurt by what happened to me.

 

[St_Worm2]

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him? Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance? Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?

Hi Msj2001, I see that you are still pretty new around here, so first off, WELCOME TO CF

That said, we don't need God to "trust us" because He knows us far better than we could ever hope to ourselves. He has, in fact, known from long before we were born exactly what we would choose to do in each moment of our lives .. e.g. Psalms 139:1-16. He has given us free will (the ability to choose what we desire most at any given moment in time), though He interferes with that at times for our good .. Romans 8:28.

As for praying to and asking God for things, the Christian life isn't so much about the blessings that He has to offer us as it is about knowing Him and being in relationship with Him as our loving, Abba (Father) .. cf John 17:3. He has promised to give us what we need and what we desire, but that (particularly the latter thought) is normally so only within the confines of our relationship with Him (because He loves us and knows and wants what is best for us .. cf Romans 8:32).

As for how we know if we are walking in accordance with His will, again, finding this out is less about the list of do's and don't's in the Bible (that is a big part of it however) because again, the Christian life is about our growing relationship with Him, and it is in that relationship with Him that our minds are renewed (as we spend time with Him in His word and in prayer) so that we are able to "prove what the will of God is" .. e.g. Romans 12:2 cf Deuteronomy 11:18; Joshua 1:8; Psalms 1:1-3; 119:9-11; 2 Timothy 3:16-17

As far as God granting our desires, here's some of what the Bible has to say about that. This is actually a commandment with a promise.

Psalms 37
4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.​

The key to this verse is our focusing exclusively on the first 1/2 of it, and if we understand and obey the command, He will fulfill His promise to us. IOW, the key is in our chasing after Him, not after the things that we want from Him (see Matthew 6:33 as well).

This verse can also be a bit of a dangerous one if the command to "delight YOURSELF in the Lord" is understood to mean to "DELIGHT the Lord" instead. If it is understood as somehow "delighting" the Lord, you end up turning Him into something He absolutely is not, a Cosmic Sugar-Daddy

God bless you!

--David
p.s. - here are a couple of Christian quotes that you may find useful in uncovering a little bit of what God is up to in our lives Actually, make that four quotes from Missionary/Author Elisabeth Elliot, and one from A. W. Pink. (the 4th quote below from Elisabeth Elliot may seem a bit out of place in this discussion, but it is at the center of what God is always up to, in one way or another, in the lives of all of His children)

"God never withholds from His child that which His love and wisdom call good. He never denies our heart's desire except to give us something better"

"God has promised to supply all of our needs.What we don't have now we do not need now"

"God is God. Because He is God, He is worthy of my trust and obedience. I will find rest nowhere but in His holy will, a will that is unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to."

"Our vision is so limited we can hardly imagine a love that does not show itself in protection from suffering…. The love of God did not protect His own Son…. He will not necessarily protect us – not from anything it takes to make us like His Son. A lot of hammering and chiseling and purifying by fire will have to go into the process." ​

​

 

[Msj2001]

Hi Msj2001, I see that you are still pretty new around here, so first off, WELCOME TO CF

That said, we don't need God to "trust us" because He knows us far better than we could ever hope to ourselves. He has, in fact, known from long before we were born exactly what we would choose to do in each moment of our lives .. e.g. Psalms 139:1-16. He has given us free will (the ability to choose what we desire most at any given moment in time), though He interferes with that at times for our good .. Romans 8:28.

As for praying to and asking God for things, the Christian life isn't so much about the blessings that He has to offer us as it is about knowing Him and being in relationship with Him as our loving, Abba (Father) .. cf John 17:3. He has promised to give us what we need and what we desire, but that (particularly the latter thought) is normally so only within the confines of our relationship with Him (because He loves us and knows and wants what is best for us .. cf Romans 8:32).

As for how we know if we are walking in accordance with His will, again, finding this out is less about the list of do's and don't's in the Bible (that is a big part of it however) because again, the Christian life is about our growing relationship with Him, and it is in that relationship with Him that our minds are renewed (as we spend time with Him in His word and in prayer) so that we are able to "prove what the will of God is" .. e.g. Romans 12:2 cf Deuteronomy 11:18; Joshua 1:8; Psalms 1:1-3; 119:9-11; 2 Timothy 3:16-17

As far as God granting our desires, here's some of what the Bible has to say about that. This is actually a commandment with a promise.

Psalms 37
4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.​

The key to this verse is our focusing exclusively on the first 1/2 of it, and if we understand and obey the command, He will fulfill His promise to us. IOW, the key is in our chasing after Him, not after the things that we want from Him (see Matthew 6:33 as well).

This verse can also be a bit of a dangerous one if the command to "delight YOURSELF in the Lord" is understood to mean to "DELIGHT the Lord" instead. If it is understood as somehow "delighting" the Lord, you end up turning Him into something He absolutely is not, a Cosmic Sugar-Daddy

God bless you!

--David
p.s. - here are a couple of Christian quotes that you may find useful in uncovering a little bit of what God is up to in our lives Actually, make that four quotes from Missionary/Author Elisabeth Elliot, and one from A. W. Pink. (the 4th quote below from Elisabeth Elliot may seem a bit out of place in this discussion, but it is at the center of what God is always up to, in one way or another, in the lives of all of His children)

"God never withholds from His child that which His love and wisdom call good. He never denies our heart's desire except to give us something better"

"God has promised to supply all of our needs.What we don't have now we do not need now"

"God is God. Because He is God, He is worthy of my trust and obedience. I will find rest nowhere but in His holy will, a will that is unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to."

"Our vision is so limited we can hardly imagine a love that does not show itself in protection from suffering…. The love of God did not protect His own Son…. He will not necessarily protect us – not from anything it takes to make us like His Son." ​

​

*Thank You for replying. And thank you for your reply. I have come to realize that even with your answer, I understand but fail to recieve it in my spirit. After praying for a healed heart and still seeing my childrens father with his new girlfriend...I walked away from my faith. But the weird thing is: I still listen to sermons, trying not to sin, and is still trying to seek answers (maybe because I dont want anything else bad to happen to me?) The spirit of fear and doubt has caused me to be numb.

​

 

[SavedByGrace3]

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him?
He does not trust us because we are not trustworthy. He, on the other hand is.

Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance?
His will is revealed in His word. It is not hidden. There are no mysteries or secrets. All you have to do is accept it and side with Him.

Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?
Because God is pleased by faith. He expects us to believe in Him and His goodness and His promises. Praying is a part of that. Plus, He in fact does grant us things without us asking or even knowing we are going to need them.

2. How do we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but still live a life of sin?
We also have a flesh, and are instructed to walk according to the inclinations of the spirit and not the flesh. Don't be deceived that you will ever be perfect in this life. You will not... but He will deliver you perfect to the Father. He knows how to do that. Confess sins, and He is faithful and just to forgive. Count on that.

If you're not having sex and not treating people bad, we are still being punished for our thoughts and maybe actions...
We will be chastised for things. We will grow and get better. There are remedies and actions you can take. I am amazed when people claim the no longer sin in any way shape or manner. I think we sin in ways that we do not even know. You just have to trust in Him and do your best.

3. Is God really in control of everything? When things like a breakup or homelessness arise, how does God get the glory when He decides to turn it around?
No He is not controlling everything. The Word states that the god of this world controls the whole world. There is a good book "The 'God is in Control of Everything' Myth"
We can overcome his and the world. First we have to acknowledge that He is not the source of our problems and that He wants us to overcome the evil.

4. If we repent of the sins we know and maybe dont know, why do we have to suffer the consequences of them?
Because the devil takes advantage. It is a battle. A wrestling match of sorts. All of us are in this fight. Take heart. You are not alone.

It is normal and ok to seek answers. Take care not to let the devil move the seeking into questioning and doubting. Side with God.

 

[mukk_in]

Hello,

I posted something about my situation not too long ago. I am still hurting that my situation caused me to lose my job, house, childrens father at the same time.

None the less, what questions I have is this:

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him? Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance? Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?
2. How do we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but still live a life of sin? If you're not having sex and not treating people bad, we are still being punished for our thoughts and maybe actions...
3. Is God really in control of everything? When things like a breakup or homelessness arise, how does God get the glory when He decides to turn it around?
4. If we repent of the sins we know and maybe dont know, why do we have to suffer the consequences of them?

These questions have allowed me to take a step back on God, my faith. I am more confused and more hurt by what happened to me.

2) Having sex is not always a sin. Sex is blessed in marriage, a covenant relationship (Hebrews 13:4). Those born of the Holy Spirit have the power to not sin (1 John 3:9). Sometimes, even Spirit led saints can sin, like King David (Psalm 51). In such cases, the saint is forgiven upon repentance (1 John 2:1).

God bless.

 

[St_Worm2]

I have come to realize that even with your answer, I understand but fail to receive it in my spirit. After praying for a healed heart and still seeing my childrens father with his new girlfriend...I walked away from my faith. But the weird thing is: I still listen to sermons, trying not to sin, and is still trying to seek answers (maybe because I dont want anything else bad to happen to me?) The spirit of fear and doubt has caused me to be numb.

Hi again Msj2001, I'm very sorry to hear about the struggles that you have been/are going through right now in your life, especially since it has ended up being the cause of a distancing between yourself and the Lord You were deeply hurt by the actions of someone who you trusted and loved, and you are mad at God for allowing it to happen. The question is, do you really believe that God was the One at fault in this?

As a Christian, you know that God loves you, even though He knows EVERYTHING about you , even better, in fact, than you could possibly hope to know yourself. And you also know that He wants the very best for you (since He sent 'His' very best to die for you on the Cross so that you could have it), so the question is, are you going to patiently wait on Him to deliver His best to you this time, or not? Will you really/truly/fully trust Him to make the right decision(s) for you concerning the parts of your life that are the most important to you, no matter what His choice may be, and no matter what His timing is?

The two little words that are perhaps the two most important of all words for living the Christian life, Trust God, are also two of the most difficult words for Christians to truly obey, because obeying them means that we must be ready to give up on/surrender to Him all the things that we want (or at least ~think~ we want) and accept and trust that what He has in store for us will be even better (if it ends up not being the very thing or person, etc., that we've wanted all along, that is).

So the question remains, do you believe that God was responsible for bringing your children's father into your life, that this man was part of God's perfect will for you and His very best choice for you? If not, why not try surrendering your will to Him again as His child by trusting Him, delighting yourself in Him, and waiting patiently on Him to do that for you this time, come what may

There's more to talk about, but this has already become too long, so I'll stop here.

Praying for you! God bless you!

--David
p.s. - Pastor Chuck Swindoll (who is also the Chancellor of Dallas Theological Seminary) delivered a message to the student body and staff of Dallas about this very subject a few years back. Here is a fairly short excerpt from it that I hope you will find to be both useful and encouraging.

.​

 

[Msj2001]

Hi again Msj2001, I'm very sorry to hear about the struggles that you have been/are going through right now in your life, especially since it has ended up being the cause of a distancing between yourself and the Lord You were deeply hurt by the actions of someone who you trusted and loved, and you are mad at God for allowing it to happen. The question is, do you really believe that God was the One at fault in this?

As a Christian, you know that God loves you, even though He knows EVERYTHING about you , even better, in fact, than you could possibly hope to know yourself. And you also know that He wants the very best for you (since He sent 'His' very best to die for you on the Cross so that you could have it), so the question is, are you going to patiently wait on Him to deliver His best to you this time, or not? Will you really/truly/fully trust Him to make the right decision(s) for you concerning the parts of your life that are the most important to you, no matter what His choice may be, and no matter what His timing is?

The two little words that are perhaps the two most important of all words for living the Christian life, Trust God, are also two of the most difficult words for Christians to truly obey, because obeying them means that we must be ready to give up on/surrender to Him all the things that we want (or at least ~think~ we want) and accept and trust that what He has in store for us will be even better (if it ends up not being the very thing or person, etc., that we've wanted all along, that is).

So the question remains, do you believe that God was responsible for bringing your children's father into your life, that this man was part of God's perfect will for you and His very best choice for you? If not, why not try surrendering your will to Him again as His child by trusting Him, delighting yourself in Him, and waiting patiently on Him to do that for you this time, come what may

There's more to talk about, but this has already become too long, so I'll stop here.

Praying for you! God bless you!

--David
p.s. - Pastor Chuck Swindoll (who is also the Chancellor of Dallas Theological Seminary) delivered a message to the student body and staff of Dallas about this very subject a few years back. Here is a fairly short excerpt from it that I hope you will find to be both useful and encouraging.

.​

This relationship began to fail when I found out I was pregnant. My childrens father wasnt there for me. He was already dealing with the other girl. I cant say that she was the reason why he was trying to take my girls from me, allowed me to be homeless, but I would say it wasnt all his idea. I have been patiently waiting on God to "heal me". Asked God what is needed to break the soul ties, what do I need to do to not wake up in anger and pain. At this point, I don't need strength, I need a miracle.
I understand why so many people walk away from their faith, turn atheist, commit suicide. People are going to the Lord with every detail in their hearts and still nothing. I know I have. As much as I am by myself (commuting to and from work, when the girls are sleep,etc...) I should be able to have a better relationship with God, but I dont. I believe that its more fear that He is going to take everything away from me again. I was trying to get my life right the time all hell broke lose in my life...i committed to a church, paying tithes, praying for things and people I never prayed for in my life! I dont expect God to be my personal genie and fix every broken thing, but I expect God to stop the pain and hurt and grant me the peace that surpasses all understanding

 

[Msj2001]

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him?
He does not trust us because we are not trustworthy. He, on the other hand is.

Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance?
His will is revealed in His word. It is not hidden. There are no mysteries or secrets. All you have to do is accept it and side with Him.

Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?
Because God is pleased by faith. He expects us to believe in Him and His goodness and His promises. Praying is a part of that. Plus, He in fact does grant us things without us asking or even knowing we are going to need them.

2. How do we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but still live a life of sin?
We also have a flesh, and are instructed to walk according to the inclinations of the spirit and not the flesh. Don't be deceived that you will ever be perfect in this life. You will not... but He will deliver you perfect to the Father. He knows how to do that. Confess sins, and He is faithful and just to forgive. Count on that.

If you're not having sex and not treating people bad, we are still being punished for our thoughts and maybe actions...
We will be chastised for things. We will grow and get better. There are remedies and actions you can take. I am amazed when people claim the no longer sin in any way shape or manner. I think we sin in ways that we do not even know. You just have to trust in Him and do your best.

3. Is God really in control of everything? When things like a breakup or homelessness arise, how does God get the glory when He decides to turn it around?
No He is not controlling everything. The Word states that the god of this world controls the whole world. There is a good book "The 'God is in Control of Everything' Myth"
We can overcome his and the world. First we have to acknowledge that He is not the source of our problems and that He wants us to overcome the evil.

4. If we repent of the sins we know and maybe dont know, why do we have to suffer the consequences of them?
Because the devil takes advantage. It is a battle. A wrestling match of sorts. All of us are in this fight. Take heart. You are not alone.

It is normal and ok to seek answers. Take care not to let the devil move the seeking into questioning and doubting. Side with God.

Thank You for replying. I was trying to trust God when I was capsized. At that time, I was the modern Job. I did everything I was suppose to do(I think) to trust God in my darkest hour.
I lost sight of trust when He is allowing me to still becin the valley since September 2018. I prayed for my family. Who wants to be a single mother? I prayed for help. My childrens father was in the exact same situation and I opened my heart and doors for him. That man could care less whether I lived or died because of his girlfriend.
I'm sorry. I'm done talking about this. This is not helping me. I appreciate your response when you said that I am not the only one. Kinda hard to believe that when you see people being blessed and doing more sin than I am...

 

[Hazelelponi]

This relationship began to fail when I found out I was pregnant. My childrens father wasnt there for me. He was already dealing with the other girl. I cant say that she was the reason why he was trying to take my girls from me, allowed me to be homeless, but I would say it wasnt all his idea. I have been patiently waiting on God to "heal me". Asked God what is needed to break the soul ties, what do I need to do to not wake up in anger and pain. At this point, I don't need strength, I need a miracle.
I understand why so many people walk away from their faith, turn atheist, commit suicide. People are going to the Lord with every detail in their hearts and still nothing. I know I have. As much as I am by myself (commuting to and from work, when the girls are sleep,etc...) I should be able to have a better relationship with God, but I dont. I believe that its more fear that He is going to take everything away from me again. I was trying to get my life right the time all hell broke lose in my life...i committed to a church, paying tithes, praying for things and people I never prayed for in my life! I dont expect God to be my personal genie and fix every broken thing, but I expect God to stop the pain and hurt and grant me the peace that surpasses all understanding

Hello. I would like to say a few things that may sound harsh, although it's not intended harshly.

God is a God. I think that is something very difficult for most of us to actually wrap our heads around to begin with. But any being that can create this earth and all that's in it, the universe and all that it contains, sustaining it all with this perfect harmony, well, that's intelligence and majesty that we usually have a difficult time wrapping our heads around.

Then we consider that this being, even with 7 billion other people on this planet might take some notice of me, little ole me when I'm no more than a single grain of sand on the shore, well, that is just mind blowing as a whole. And might, if you were to truly consider it, give you pause and alone cause you to stop to worship such an awesome God.

I'm not saying this to give any kind of pause or doubt, because God does indeed take notice of you. He even knows how many hairs are on your head and actually and truly loves you and desires what is best for you. It is truly an amazing thing!

However, you say you don't expect God to be your personal genie, but you do expect God to do "x" and "x".

The problem here is that God tells us to seek His Face and not His Hand.

Matthew 6:33 states for us to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things (necessities of life) will be added to you.

When we look for God's power to get through this crisis, and then go on about our business until the next crisis then look for God's power to get through that.. it's not seeking the Kingdom of God or His righteousness.. it's not seeking His Face, it's instead seeking His Hand (hand means power and might)

Its like that one friend you only hear from when they need some cash. eventually you'll cringe when the phone rings and it's them, because they are just a user... yet that's what we do to God, we become users instead of being a real friend.

Whereas, what God is seeking with us, is that relationship, one that is continual, constant, and based in love and adoration.

Once we have that relationship with God, everything else falls into place. The peace, the necessities of life.. etc. just exist. Life will still have hardships and trials because the rain falls on the just and unjust alike, but the overall is under control because our Father is good and we have peace in the most difficult of times, because God is with us.

But that doesnt exist until you stop seeking His power, but instead seek that relationship based in love and adoration.. and seek it until you actually find it, not giving up, but going after God only for the sake of knowing Him..

the above video is relevant, you will gain a lot from listening to it.

 

[topher694]

Hello,

I posted something about my situation not too long ago. I am still hurting that my situation caused me to lose my job, house, childrens father at the same time.

None the less, what questions I have is this:

1. Why doesnt God trust us, but He expects us to trust Him? Its stated in the Bible that if we pray and ask, it will be given to us IN accordance to his will. How do we know what is in accordance? Why wont God grant us the things we desire instead of praying for it?
2. How do we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but still live a life of sin? If you're not having sex and not treating people bad, we are still being punished for our thoughts and maybe actions...
3. Is God really in control of everything? When things like a breakup or homelessness arise, how does God get the glory when He decides to turn it around?
4. If we repent of the sins we know and maybe dont know, why do we have to suffer the consequences of them?

These questions have allowed me to take a step back on God, my faith. I am more confused and more hurt by what happened to me.

1a. God does trust people, but trust is earned. Trust flows from character and integrity. God is 100% trustworthy because He is the standard for character and integrity. We are not, but if we seek after Him we should be growing and learning to be better at it. So, If we make our starting point trusting in Him - even when we don't understand - then our foundation is built on something 100% trustworthy.

1b. God's will will a) always line up with scripture (ie not violate scripture) and b) includes not just the "what" but also the "when" and "how"... in other words: the timing and method is His. In my experience the place people miss it the most is not in the "what" but in the timing. Getting ahead of God's timing and trying to make something happen on their own, or, waiting for Him to do everything for them while they do nothing (we can always find something to do to prepare ourselves for God's plan to manifest in our lives)

1c. Think about this in reverse. What if we got everything we needed without asking (praying) for it. How likely is it that we would give God credit for it (see 3b)? And if we did, how long would that realistically continue. Such a scenario would not produce character and integrity, but instead would foster laziness and entitlement. What sort of kingdom would we be exampling then?


2a. The Holy Spirit lives inside our reborn spirit, sin flows from our still corrupted flesh.

2b. Bad thoughts are not sin, acting on them is.

2c. God doesn't "punish" us in the way you suggest. Everything in the kingdom of God operates on the principle of seed, time, and harvest. Judgement is the sudden harvest of bad seed planted. (there are consequences for our actions). God's word is all about teaching and encouraging us to avoid that kind of harvest and embrace the kind that produces blessing.


3a. Not control the way man usually defines it. Mankind has free will and can go against God's plans. However God can see the end from the beginning and still use the bad to see His will be done for those who embrace Him. See Joseph. After his turnaround Joseph said (paraphrase), "What you intended for evil, God used for good"

3b. God gets the glory when we give Him the glory which is why we need to trust Him (1a). But God doesn't seek the glory to pad His ego or anything like that. The point of God getting the glory is so that others will see and hear what He has done and be drawn into His kingdom. God getting the glory = more people saved.


4a. Because of 2c. Again, God doesn't cause these things, but there are consequences to our poor decisions. However, when we do repent, that opens the door for God to work 3a in our lives. btw, you can repent from (turn away from) something you haven't participated in. In this case you would not see any bad harvest because you never participated in it (but perhaps you were exposed to it, or tempted by it), but you can still determine to turn away from that behavior. This would be operating in 1a.