I have Autism

[laureenoluv8]

Hey. My name is Lauren, I was diagnosed with autism in my toddler years. It's actually very mild, a lot of people don't even know I have it, but everyday I struggle with obsession problems. When something happens that I do not like, I don't know how to let it go. I constantly think about it over and over again. It's like it's the only thing that can drive my thoughts and it's too hard to tear away from it.
An example. One time when I was in the car with my Aunt, Mom, and my Aunt's baby. the baby was crying just because her shoe wasn't buckled all the way and my aunt couldn't put it on because she was busy driving. Me and mom tried to buckle it, but because she's a baby, she threw a fit since her mother wouldn't do it.
In the car I was feeling really queasy, and after hearing so many ear piercing cries, I blew up. "OKAY CAN SOMEONE STOP THE CAR AND FIX THE BABY'S SHOE SO SHE WILL SHUT UP?!?!?!" After that my mom started yelling at me because of how rude I was being, and I told her that it didn't come out right, and she was like "uh..YEAH. it did."
I said sorry and she understood....but I still felt like she didn't. I began to feel really bad and I got tense and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I apologized to my mom again but then she said she would get mad if I kept bringing it up. But I couldn't stop thinking about it on the whole car ride.

Stuff like that happens to me everyday. One little thing consumes my mind and I can't stop thinking about it.

Right now my obsession is about Christianity and what is really real and what is not. I've been a believer for about 2 or 3 years and the whole time I've been suffering in doubt because I hear the following things:

"Most Christians are crazy people."
"Christianity is just a carbon copy of other Pagan religions."
"Everything on this site www dot BANDOLI.no ( i had to type it like that because it won't let me post links yet)"
"Evolution is more accurate"
"God is not fair in many parts of the Bible"
"The Bible may be proven written in AD, but it's still fiction."
AND blah blah blah. The list goes on forever.

The thing is, I have moments when I feel on fire for Jesus, but then there are times when I feel like I'm just wrong. And since I have autism, I begin to think that maybe that trait has something to do with my beliefs. Like, maybe I'm so used to listening to others opinions...that I don't have one for my own.

Maybe since I'm insecure, I only believe in God cause it makes me feel good.

And maybe if I convince yourself something is real long enough, it becomes real in my mind and it's just imaginary. I don't know...it's just too hard to follow Christ or any other god. People will always beat you down and find convincing answers disapproving it.

So what should I do? How can I be firm in my beliefs? Who should I talk to? Please help me out on this, I don't know who else to talk to. I can't even talk to my family about this because I'm the only Christian in my household. ....

 

[love_123]

the Holy Bible is writen by the edification of the Holy Spirit. People cannot understand it without the Holy Spirit's edification. People's judgement of the word of God is unfair. How can people see through God?! The truth is the truth. Those people who tell those lies about God are deceived by the devil. For people without the Holy Spirit cannot know God. They can't understand the Bible. When the Bible is interpreted by the Holy Spirit, mysteries of the world are revealed, and the Bible is completely coherent and undeniable. Geologists used to question the age of earth. They found it by science a lot older than human history in the Bible. And they found that inconsistent to Bible. The fact is, they don't read God's mind. Reading the Bible by the Hohly Spirit's edification back and forth, we know the earth is very very old, long exsted before human. There are so many truth in the Bible have been discovered by scientists later. eg. Noah's Ark has been found. And if you read about the recovery of Israel, read about the war they engaged the moment they reestablished. You will find that God's miracles are with them as true as it was in the old days wrtten in the Bible. That doesn't say the Bible is proven true. The truth is the truth. It only means God has made these men found the truth by science. Human are so finite and small in the universe. We know so little. Scientists can't even creat a human, not even dirt! Scientists can only discover and make things with God's creations, with what is already there. Along the human history, has any monkey become a human? Scientists can't even tell everything about the earth, needless to say the whole universe. Scientists change and change. They revise and revise their works. But God never changes. God stands the same forever and ever.

I believe certain demons are manipulating you with autism. You need to accept Christ as your Lord and savior, and be baptised. Then you have died on the cross in Christ. Your past has gone. Your sins are forgiven. You see yourself dead to sin and alive to God. The life of Christ lives in you. You have to put down yourself and surrender to Christ. Christ is our authority that you don't fight with the devil with your flesh, not by yourself, but the Lord fights it for you. And He is your victory. There's so much to talk about where the demons came (before human history), and about Christ, God's will and plan and purpose.

You need the life of Christ to drive away the devil or the demons because if you are empty, they would come and dwell in you. They still influence us when we live in the flesh, when we are tempted by worldly desires, and so on. Spiritual/mental problems are caused by demonic spirits. You must read the word of God by edification of the Holy Spirit (this you must pray), and as you grow in Christ, you will be able to differentiate your own thoguhts, the demon/devils thoughts put in your head, and the will of God. The word of God is our spiritual food that makes us stronger and stronger. The initial life of Christ is like an egg, we must care for it and let it take form in us, and we will be more and more like Him. This is not a transformation, but a change of life. we ourselves get less and less, the life of Christ becomes more and more in us.

Don't hold onto to yourself, hold onto the Lord, trust and obey by His spirit, He does all things for you. Rest in His love. And as you grow in Him, your wisdom grows. Pray for His wisdom to come in play in you, you get it. You'll see it is so unnecessary for you to worry about what is already past. Keep on thinking it over can't help. Trust God for all things. Everyone makes mistakes. And people understands that. You care about others' views towards Christians, and your obsession problems. This shows that you care too much about other's judgement on you or worry too much about things or yourself. Worldly people don't understand Godly people. It's because they are of the world. They live in flesh. We live in Spirit. We love God. They love the world. Are those critised as crazy Christians insane? No, they are not destructive, not to the world, not to people, not to themselves. They only are 'crazy' for God. We love God so much because we know we have a God that is fair, that is to reward us according to our devotion. We do what we are called by God to do. People controled by the devil's authority don't understand. And they are mortal, after this life, they'll understand in hell, but too late.

As a Christian, you will know that after something wrong is done, you ask for God's forgiveness and He forgives you. and believe it. The only thing you should do is praise Him and thank Him.

And you can and must trust Him, trust His will. 'Cast all your burdens on Him (Christ), because He cares for you.' "He'll never fail you nor disappoint you.' Saty in the Holy Spirit's edification, and He will give you wisdom and open your eyes to the truth.

 

[laureenoluv8]

Thanks for your response. It's even hard for me to pray to God sometimes because all those things that the worldly people said stick to my brain. They all seem so convincing and logical...like that website I posted on my first post on this thread. They said that Jesus is just a copy of a bunch of other deities, such as Asklepios, Hercules, Prometheus, Dionysos, Osiris, and even Buddha. Just check out that website yourself, (www dot bandoli.no)it has a lot of evidence disapproving Jesus and his existence. (i'm not saying the only reason I'm unsure of my belief is because of the website, but this does have a lot of *proof*...). And it's like, Christianity is the most bombarded religion ever, it's been beaten down and torn apart.

Thank you for your post..but I don't know how I can give myself to Christ when there is *proof* that other gods before Christ did very similar things.....as if Christ was a copy

 

[love_123]

After I became a Christian, I had some friends telling me about that sort of things. I never give in. And Christ never let me down. You know why Christian is so tortured on earth? it's because of the devil. God is testing and bulding us through these, letting the devil still exist while their judgement was done and they were no longer God's sons but His enemies. If He put devil to the eternal fire now, He'll also have to put people there. That's why He sent His only begotten son to save the world, to save those who are under Satan to hear the truth, to live the life of Christ and walk His way, so that He doesn't have to kill all the lives on earth again. God is a loving God, and He is righteous. I know this can be hard for you to understand now.

other religions and 'gods' are totally different from Jesus. Because all other religions command you to do good out of your own behavior. While Jesus, because He is the only real God (God's son, as God is trinity of the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit), He is the only one capable to wash away all our sins with His blood. He died for us. Actually we died in Him. And when you believe that He died and rose again and get baptised .His life comes into you and lives in you. So the difference as a Christian is that all the good deeds are done by God Himself! so that you don't find it hard, but with joy you obey His word by His own Spirit. My mom had been sick and she looked very pale then, soon after she got baptised, she got well, her face even shine with glory and relieved. you know why? it's the Holy Spirit that comes in her and the demons are gone. The devil, Satan who holds the authoirity of death upon sinners is no longer ruling in us. Christ Himself take back His authority over the earth from Satan.

All glory to God! Thank you for using me, Jesus. pleasure to help further

 

[love_123]

1COR 1:30 But of him are yein Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption

PHIL 4:6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

PHIL 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and mindsthrough Christ Jesus.

JN 15:4 Abide in me, and I in you.

ROM 6:5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection:

ROM 6:6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.

ROM 6:7 For he that is dead is freed from sin

ROM 6:11 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord.

GAL 3:3 Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh?


GAL 2:20 I am crucified with Christ: neverthless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

ROM 8:37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

These are verses that God tells us we Christians don't live by ourlseves.

All my explanation to you are from the Holy Bible. There are verses that tells us about Satan and demons. Everything is from the Bible. The true interpretation by edification of the Holy Spirit is different than those who say that Christ is a model.

 

[boogy6]

I also have autism and I go through the exact same things you do and it is very hard for me to forget things that are not important. At least you were diagnosed at a very young age. I was only diagnosed at the age of 10 after many many years of wrongful diagnosises.

I am half catholic- i now that sounds really wierd but my mom is catholic and my dad is not. I was not a firm believer for most of my life. My dad has said that I belong with a "cult" or that God doesn't exisit and that its all make-belive. he also always coplains about the music that they just sing Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, and it burns his ears. But the weird thing is that he listens to U2 which are a christian band but you wouldn't really think that they were.

I started getting more connected when I went to a catholic winter camp with some people from my gr. 7 catichism (sorry can't spell) class 7years ago, I had a blast. Then the next summer I started going, and I have gone every year since. I have been a counsellor there for 3 years and im going on my 4th year. Ever year at camp on the last night of the week we have a "Holy Spirit Night", some years its adoration, praise and worship or just talking with God and Jesus we can also get prayed over. sometimes on this night the holy spirit usually makes me cry, but this year i was called to just sit with a fellow counsellor who needed to be comforted.

This year at christmas I went to a catholic confrence in the city I live in with more than 300 other young people to learn,get more in touch with our faith.

The people that are saying those things are just lacking the true love of our God and Jesus.

Therre is unfortiantly no patron saint for us but the closest is the patron saint of neurological disorders- St.Dymphna.

a couple of songs that I have enjoyed listening to and have touched me and hope they help you as well are: For the Moments I feel Faint, Who I Am Hates Who I've been- Reilent K; All Day- Hillsong; and All in All- Nichole Nordeman. There are a few others but their French songs that we sing at camp but I unforninattly don't speak french and the names don't stick

hope this helps keep the spirits up there are many people like us God Bless

 

[love_123]

You should go to a non-denominational church solidly based on Christ, the son of our everlasting God. (mathew 13:16, 16:13-19)
and it's against God to worship anyone else than Himself. Mary is human.

 

[laureenoluv8]

Yea I do go to a non-denominational church. Actually it's for everybody my age, highschoolers, and I get along with them pretty well. We're going to a summer camp later this week, and I'm just hoping that God will give me a break from everything worldly and to just give me a few days to focus on Him. I talked to people at my small group today about my problems, and they asked me "Where did these people who dissaproved Christianity get their evidence? Why don't you ask them?" That made me think "hm...no matter what I do, there will always be somebody trying to attack my belief, but I cannot let that put me down. I need to remember what I believe in and why I believe in it."

Thanks guys, you've been a big help. I'll do my best to keep my eyes on what I cannot see. Thank you again.

 

[Mr_Sun]

here is something that may help you out if you ever feel lost and don't know what to think.


My brother has autism. He doesn't talk much and he is 15. he mostly answers us with quotes from movies he watches (he watches a lot of DVDs) He has other friend with autism though that don't have it as severe as him though so I think I can begin to help.

I think that the way to settle your mind would be to try and tell yourself that those people who say those things shouldn't have impact on you. If you don't know them then why should you believe them. I saw a bunch of things on the internet in my earlier years of being a Christian and its hard to get over it I know... but I eventually came to the decision to just say, those people don't know me or what I believe in. so I wont let them influence me. And the same should be for you! nobody knows what it is really like to have autism. I cry for my brother every time I think about how he must feel because I just cant come to realize... but that's because he has it severe.

Don't let others you don't respect influence you. You could even write it on a piece of paper that you keep in your pocket or something whenever you feel lost or you can't let things go. It helped for me but I don't have autism but I think it may help for you! you could try it at least! My prayers are with you.

 

[love_123]

just been caring about your progress in combating autism. i used to have autism as well, but never was diagnosed, although my reactions brought massive worries and anxieties in the family. i used to worry all the time, and fret over what i had said or certain odd behaviors. just recently, in a meal my mom's friends hosted, i made a very very awkward statement about US. i later doubted about whether what i said was true (i deleted the misleading part. i made a personal embarrassment, which was completely my wrong memory). i found out yesterday what i said was completely nonsense! i felt so bad and embarrassed, lost face, etc. i then was reminded in my head immediately the massive mistakes the government leaders make in public, like Obama's comments on the Harvard professor's arrest, Greenspan's big mistake that largely caused the eventual US sub-prime crisis and the economic meltdown in the world, the recent calculation mistake made by conference board... the list can go on and on

but those ppl didn't frustrate or fell. they are so confident and go on and grow. before i became a christian (baptised with the in dwell Holy Spirit), although mom tried her best to pursuad me out of my obssession, i just couldn't. i made it this time! after realising mistake is human, face doesnt matter, all that matters is God, i surrenderred my problem to Christ, and immediately-- no exaggeration at all, i felt the sense of peace and joy within me, and i no longer obssessed with it.
'men dont determine your destiny, God does.'

hope this will help you

 

[Sabertooth]

just been caring about your progress in combating autism. i used to have autism as well, but never was diagnosed, although my reactions brought massive worries and anxieties in the family. i used to worry all the time, and fret over what i had said or certain odd behaviors. just recently, in a meal my mom's friends hosted, i made a very very awkward statement about US. i later doubted about whether what i said was true (i deleted the misleading part. i made a personal embarrassment, which was completely my wrong memory). i found out yesterday what i said was completely nonsense! i felt so bad and embarrassed, lost face, etc. i then was reminded in my head immediately the massive mistakes the government leaders make in public, like Obama's comments on the Harvard professor's arrest, Greenspan's big mistake that largely caused the eventual US sub-prime crisis and the economic meltdown in the world, the recent calculation mistake made by conference board... the list can go on and on

but those ppl didn't frustrate or fell. they are so confident and go on and grow. before i became a christian (baptised with the in dwell Holy Spirit), although mom tried her best to pursuad me out of my obssession, i just couldn't. i made it this time! after realising mistake is human, face doesnt matter, all that matters is God, i surrenderred my problem to Christ, and immediately-- no exaggeration at all, i felt the sense of peace and joy within me, and i no longer obssessed with it.
'men dont determine your destiny, God does.'

hope this will help you

 

[step7hen]

The only Christian in your household, thats awesome! how did you become a Christian? the fact you have obsessions shouldn't be a bad thing! its obsession with something that moves the world forward! Mozart didn't like music, he was obsessed with it, the same with all great individuals. The best thing you could be obsessed about is jesus! and i hope you continue to be a Christian, the world could do with more obsessed Christians! the world likes to reject people who are different, buts it people who are different that will make change, Jesus was very different! don't be sad

 

[RedLioness]

I also have Autism. I grew up with it but they did not catch it until I was 21. Do you spend a lot of time alone? Growing up I was a loner and I did not think anything of it.

My weakness seems to be people. You know, talking to them and stuff. And then I have mental breakdowns.

You know they told me the brain was too complicated an instrument to fix. Which means any of us who have brain problems may never get them cured, I'll bet

 

[flowerforever7]

I recommend books by Josh McDowell about Christian evidences that confront topics like these; I think it's worth it to invest in if you have questions like this. He has one out called New Evidence That Demands A Verdict. I find the Case for a Creator DVD by Lee Strobel very informative additionally. I find I can usually buy stuff for a good price from the Amazon website.