I hate Roommates!

[ZACTAK]

Well, I thought that having two very Christian roommates would help in my walk with the Lord. In a sense it has, but definitely not in the way I had imagined. One roommate considers himself a pastor at a church, and the other is a pentacostal. There have been problems from the start, from how messy they are, to being inconsiderate of those around them. It has been an embarassment for quite a while for me to bring my friends around. They left food around, and their clothes everywhere. The place smelled horrible!

One of my roommates, Dave, became very rude and would make inappropriate comments to me that made me very mad at times. He made comments asking what type of household did I grow up in, to telling me that I will see my grandparents when I go home for Christmas, because I was very short on time. He also made comments about how I should feel ashamed because I was complaining about having to go home for a few days. These hurtful comments made me mad, but I would let them slide, because I didn't want to make our living environment unbearable.

When this semester came, I was basically just going to fend for myself, clean up my own messes and not deal with my roommates at all. The other night after a long busy day at work, I came to my dorm to find my toothpaste in the trash and my toothbrush laying on the sink dirty. I asked my roommate what had happened, and he told me he had cleaned the bathroom with it because he didn't know it was mine. I have an online journal, and I wrote about how I was irritated. A friend of mine called him a jerk, and supposedly got into a fight online with him. When I saw he was talking to her, I asked him about it... man was that a mistake. The hatred that came out in what he was yelling was ridiculous. He calls himself a Christian and yet, sat there trying to defame my character. Making up lies and painting me as some alcoholic, when I rarely ever drink. I feared for my safety, and wouldn't put it past him to have thrown a book at me or come at me in some way. I work in a detention center and have seen many people on drugs, I thought from my experience that he had to be high on something. I hadn't seen a temper like that since I moved out and far away from home.

I think it is pretty sad that I had to make the decision this week to move out months before my lease was up. I can afford it, so I went with it. I moved today to a one bedroom apartment off campus. Housing at my school would have taken at least a month to get me moved to another room, so I took it upon myself to do it quicker.

 

[sunshine01]

wow, that really sucks. i hate it when people call themselves christians when they are so far from it. i bet you're glad you moved!

 

[Doubledb]

wow, sry to hear about your situation... my freshmen year i had a crazy roomate who wouldnt let me go to sleep and would play the same song on his electric guitar over and over... luckily he left to another school after that fall. Luckily the other roomate i had at the same time was cool and we were roomates for four years.. we graduated and now, inronicly, we are going to the same seminary.

oh, and i did have a clean freak roomate and friend my sophmore and junior year... it was annoying sometimes, especially when i caught him being a hypocrite about it... but things werent too bad.

 

[alwayz_remember_Calvery]

ok, my roommate isn't nearly as bad as yours have been, but feel your pain.
My roomate only does annoying things like singing at the top of her lungs when she walks into the room, purposely off tune, or she'll use my dishes and she will not clean them, she's always borrowing money, has locked me out of the room about 3 times, stays up until 2-4 in the morning, skips class so she can sleep longer, then wakes up for a few hours, might make it to a few classes, takes a 2-4 hour nap, and then is up until 2-4 in the morning...She also will not let me go to sleep before 12. If i try she'll turn on the TV, start talking to me, turn on all of the lights, etc,

 

[~BelovedDaughter~]

I'm also very happy you got to move. You shouldn't have to put up with things like that and you know I'll help you however I can!

 

[Boss_BlueAngels]

Sorry to hear you've got a bad roommate man! I certainly know how you feel, though. My first one was like that a lot, except he always hung out with 2 other dudes. I've had many rude comments said to me (and even a tape "drawing" of part of the male anatomy on my side of the room) and it does suck. I never justified anything those three did with comments back as it's just too rediculous. All they are doing is trying to get a rise out of you, and if it works they'll keep getting worse and worse. If you at least ignore the comments or just say, "Oh okay, thanks" every time, they feel like the moron. lol (and they are)

Trust me on that last point. You can never win arguments/fights with people like this because everything you say/do will be used against you.

It takes a HUGE amount of personal strength to overcome this, but there really is only one way. And that is ignoring them and NOT REACTING.

Good luck my friend and stand firm! You have the full support of everyone in here!

 

[MetalBlade]

Yeah room mates can be a pain sometimes. For you all the time. But at least you got it taken care of!

 

[tryniti]

wow, every time i hear a roommate horror story, I am more greatful for the one I have. Im glad you got out of there! We will be praying for you that things will work out for you

 

[jwill03189]

Know something funny? I can 100% relate. I had 2 Christian Roommates last year and one ran out out on my and my other roommate leaving a backed up rent of 600$ or so. Something interesting though, one of my best roommate situations - one i'm in now - has been with two people who are not Christian. Funny how that works. They are also the ones I trust the most with handling rent too from my roommate history.

 

[ZACTAK]

Ok, I'm gonna be a "jerk"

I reckon you were probablly as bad as them!

I wouldn't say I was as bad as them, but I am not saying I am a perfect little angel either.

Well now we know there's goning to be problems. They're barely even proper Christians.

Please don't put words in my mouth.

See I bet you are one of those neat freaks.

I wouldn't consider myself as a neat freak, but I am not disgusting messy either.

of them were "inconsiderate" toward everyone? Or you wanted them to do/behave how you deemed fit (and prob didnt tell them)?

Inconsiderate as to leave the apartment as messy as they did, playing their music loudly, singing loudly, and talking loudly, particularly at times when I was sleeping... many people on the floor even complained to me about being able to hear them. That is not me wanting them to behave in a certain manner, it is called being considerate of those around you.

Like on radators to dry, or where they could get them instead of pristinley hung up and colour co-ordinated? You're in college!

Yes, you are right, I am in college, but the way the room was in order, was not of normal college students. I didn't expect the apartment to be neat and clean, but they left the dirty clothes around everywhere!

Ever consider buying stuff to cover up/get rid of the smell? Also everywhere smells of something.

I shouldn't have to! Thats the point!

Wow... next time someone asks me that I gonna punch them in the face... that's my business. And even if it was used as an insult then that's not exactly bad, and was probablly a reaction to something you said/did.

Its shocking how well you know what I am talking about. You know exactly why I shouldn't have gotten offended by that comment... maybe you shouldn't comment when you are ignorant about the situation.

And the complaint is? You should!

The complaint is that he yelled and demanded that I see my grandparents, the conversation wasn't even involving him... it was between a friend and I... and I was actually complaining that I wouldn't have time to see them. It was a less than 12 hour trip home... including sleep... kind of hard to fit that in.

So you spent a couple of weeks going on and on and on about having to go back for Xmas (let me guess, you're roomies wanted to but for some reason couldn't?) and you wonder why you get that reaction. Besides, he's right. And you're 22- if you didnt want to go you didnt have too.

I think my sentence structure on that sentence was fairly poor, because when I said 'for a few days,' I meant I was complaining about having to go home for a few days as in, going home for a few days, not complaining for a few days... so I didn't go on and on and on... and also, going home for a few days was not for Christmas. My roommates were gone for the entire Christmas break, unlike myself.

Also, I don't think you understand what I was saying he said... I didn't want to go home but was doing so to please my parents. My roommate told me I needed to go home, and if I didn't then I needed to pay back everything my dad has paid for... my argument was that I was 22 and didn't have to go if I really really didn't want to.

Oooh, didums got mad coz big bad davey told him he should see his grandparents and not moan about going home for Xmas.

What irks me is that you think you understand the situation! You didn't see his demeanor!!

So basically you decided to avoid confrontation that could have let them know that what they were doing anoyed you and instead pretended everything was fine and got even madder because they should have known?

You weren't there and you didn't see how they were...

You said they didn't clean! My guess is you got mad and told you roomate to clean the bathroom so he did! Besides did he really know you're toothbrush? Honestly?

Actually I never mentioned to my roommates to clean. On the second note, if he knew it wasn't his toothbrush shouldn't he assume it is another one of his roommates? Honestly.

So your roomie didn't know you were ****ed coz of your avoidence to conflict. You wrote stuff in an online journal to vent and then your friend starts abusing him and (as said by you) starts a fight with him over the internet (even though it's got nothing to do with them)?

Actually my exact comments were that I was irritated he used my toothbrush to clean the bathroom. That was it...

I hardly call an online argument abuse, possibly harassment and the sort, but definitely not abuse. I spoke with my friend about why she shouldn't have done what she did.

When you "saw" he was talking to her. Online, yeah? So did you read over his shoulder or just read his emails/messanger msg's? Hardly going to put him in a good place huh?

My friend has an interesting font and color selection that most people do not have, I could see from across the room this font, and asked him if he was talking to her... and yes it was casual.

More so than the hatred you internalise at him or the venom you spew in your online journal? Speck and log... speck and log!

Yes... because all I said on my blog was that I was irritated. THAT WAS IT!

Like a Christian would ever not be perfect! Besides, if it was only you two there who was he trying to convince? Unless he actually does believe what he said about you!

Not sure I follow you here....

Show me 10 alcohlics and I'll show you 1 person who admits they have a problem, 1 who says they drink a lot and 8 who "rarely ever drink"!

Yeah, the last drink I had was New Years! Thats real alcoholism!

Oh grow up! You've worked in a detention centre with people who are high on crack and you're scared of having a book thrown at you? Yeah right...

The point of that comment was to say I was afraid of physical force being used against me.

Now who is defaming who's character?

Sorry, but that comment is not defaming his character...

 

[Cozmo]

Mod Hat On=-

Something tells me that this doesn't belong on the forums. Please don't bring it here as we're not going to be referee's to personal or home issues.