I hate breathing.

[appointed]

Every morning I get up, I can't wait until I can go back to sleep the next night. Nothingness. That is all I will ever want. These are the reasons:

1. I can't pray.
2. My desires will not be fulfilled.
3. I am completely useless in any relationship (girls, family, friends...)
4. I can't stop sinning.
5. I find no pleasure in anything.
6. I can't sleep.
7. I am on medication.
8. My life is changing for the worst.
9. I am the root of most jokes.
10. My friends avoid me.
11. I am a failure.
12. I am ugly.
13. I am last for everything
14. Worry overtakes my life.
15. Hopelessness is always at my door.
16. People constantly throw my troubles in my face.
17. No one will hire me.
18. Food is disgusting to me.
19. Smiles are all bitter to my eyes.
20. I hate meaningless conversations
21. Life is short.
22. Life is hard.
23. I am an outsider, the 5th wheel.
24. I am weak.
25. God is disappointed in me.
26. I am disappointed in myself.
27. It seems will never complete my goals.
28. I have no meaning,
29. I die a little more everyday.
30. I fear the thought of hell.
31. I am always sick, or hurt.
32. I am deeply depressed.
33. I am very lonely.
34. Lincoln, Da Vinci, Newton....Who am I?
35. I am most always anxious and fearful.

I give up, on everything. I am done.

 

[goldenviolet]

you are very valuable. i'm sorry you are feeling pushed around. this world sometimes effects us all negatively. but God's family is knit together to build eachother up. let us begin an edifying dialog of support and encouragment for you.

healling begins at the cross. salvation is the greatest healling we can hope for. like job said to his wife, "...... Shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips." Job 2:10

as a child of God; our first healling is what Jesus gives us.

then next:

Romans 12:1-2...
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

Titus 3:4-7
4 But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, 5 not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, 6 whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

in a nut shell; let God's word, the Holy Spirit and fellowship help you focus on spiritual growth, that will help you see how valuable you are, and strengthen your spirit to not be overwelmed with life struggles; but to learn how to manage them. and be filled with joy from your Savior's cup.

 

[kisstheson]

Every morning I get up, I can't wait until I can go back to sleep the next night. Nothingness. That is all I will ever want. These are the reasons:

1. I can't pray.
2. My desires will not be fulfilled.
3. I am completely useless in any relationship (girls, family, friends...)
4. I can't stop sinning.
5. I find no pleasure in anything.
6. I can't sleep.
7. I am on medication.
8. My life is changing for the worst.
9. I am the root of most jokes.
10. My friends avoid me.
11. I am a failure.
12. I am ugly.
13. I am last for everything
14. Worry overtakes my life.
15. Hopelessness is always at my door.
16. People constantly throw my troubles in my face.
17. No one will hire me.
18. Food is disgusting to me.
19. Smiles are all bitter to my eyes.
20. I hate meaningless conversations
21. Life is short.
22. Life is hard.
23. I am an outsider, the 5th wheel.
24. I am weak.
25. God is disappointed in me.
26. I am disappointed in myself.
27. It seems will never complete my goals.
28. I have no meaning,
29. I die a little more everyday.
30. I fear the thought of hell.
31. I am always sick, or hurt.
32. I am deeply depressed.
33. I am very lonely.
34. Lincoln, Da Vinci, Newton....Who am I?
35. I am most always anxious and fearful.

I give up, on everything. I am done.

Your user name is absolutely perfect for you, dear one! You are appointed! You are appointed to be loved unconditionally by One who loved you with such a passionate love that some might call Him mad! His struggle with anxiety and depression was so great in the garden of Gethsemane that He SWEAT BLOOD!

I understand that right now it's hard to pray. It's hard to think about anything else but how terrible you feel. JESUS wants to change that list. He does! Please! Get a crucifix or a picture of Christ's suffering. See your pain in His eyes. Look at it a good long time and say to yourself. "Here is the proof that He loves me!"

I will pray for you.

 

[pockleberry]

When I read your post My heart went out to you this is no lie there are tears in my eyes for you right now. I know what it is like to feel that pain but the things on your list are lies from the devil, he wants you to believe them, he wants to destroy you. I know because that is what the devil loves to do he has done it to me and to many others. You are NOT ugly or useless or a failure or weak infact you are stronger than most because you are going through an attack of the devil and you are still here where many others would have already given up. Most of all I want you to know that God is Not disappointed in you, he loves you soo much that you could not even begin to imagine it I know it's hard to believe but I promise you it is true I would not lie. God made you exactly how he wanted you to be and that is why you are none of the things in your list. I don't know if this will have helped you at all but know that I will be praying for you, God has put you heavily on my heart

Susanna

 

[trinitygrace]

Please don't believe those lies that Satan is putting in your head!! You are God's child, not his and you were planned for God's pleasure. You can pray to Him. Just talk to Him, like you would talk to me. He's right beside you right now!! Please don't give up. That's exactly what the Devil wants you to do. Remind him of his future, which is defeat by our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!! Yay! Jesus gonna get er done!!! ~Trinity

 

[Darrell2006]

Hi appointed,
I have had some similiar feelings,
there is alot of love here you have come to the right place,

Things that help me,
The love here
Talk to god
(like another post suggested)

Turn off negative media tv radio
(listen to christian radio tv, I do this even when I don't feel like it because of the positive effects, ecspecially testominies of recovery)

Avoiding things that wil make me feel worse
(that's tough to do but possible)

I have had the terrible depression,
what gets me through is proper nutrition (supplements if your malnourished)
knowing I will get better, and knowing I'm slowly getting closer to god,

I don't mean to sound like I'm preaching, just sharing a few things that help me cope.

Daryl

 

[Servant4Yeshuah]

Every morning I get up, I can't wait until I can go back to sleep the next night. Nothingness. That is all I will ever want. These are the reasons:

1. I can't pray.Ask Yeshuah to help you. That alone is prayer
2. My desires will not be fulfilled.Yeshuah says that He is the desire of your heart and He will meet you there
3. I am completely useless in any relationship (girls, family, friends...)
You are not useless and God is not done with you yet.

4. I can't stop sinning.No you cannot, not by yourself,only Yeshuah can do this in you
5. I find no pleasure in anything.
You are in a season of pain, but it will not last
6. I can't sleep.
Your heart is hurting, but Yeshuah will give you rest
7. I am on medication.
Many are on medication. That is nothing to be concerned about. I pray only that the Lord has guided the hand of the doctor to treat you properly
8. My life is changing for the worst.
But you cannot see the future. God has His best for you even if it looks very bad.
9. I am the root of most jokes.
You are the apple of God's eye. I don't even know you and I love you.
10. My friends avoid me.
You need new friends...ask God to bring new friends to you..
11. I am a failure.
You are His beloved child who has failed at some things.
12. I am ugly.
Beauty is of the spirit. Your's is still tender enough to feel pain.
13. I am last for everything
And the last shall be first...
14. Worry overtakes my life.
In Him it shall be defeated
15. Hopelessness is always at my door.
In Him it shall be served an eviction notice
16. People constantly throw my troubles in my face.
Fix your eyes upon Yeshuah...see Him alone
17. No one will hire me.
You have not gone to everyone yet...
18. Food is disgusting to me.
Some food is disgusting..but I pray that the Lord allows you to enjoy it again
19. Smiles are all bitter to my eyes.
The smile of Yeshuah will be pleasing to you
20. I hate meaningless conversations
Me too
21. Life is short.
I agree.
22. Life is hard.
Yes, it is hard
23. I am an outsider, the 5th wheel.
The special wheel. As Christians we are outsiders. Welcome to our beloved club.
24. I am weak.
He is strong
25. God is disappointed in me.
That is a lie of the evil one. God loves you
26. I am disappointed in myself.
Look to Him and not yourself.
27. It seems will never complete my goals.
He can give you strength
28. I have no meaning,
You are precious in His sight
29. I die a little more everyday.
We all die a little more each day, but this life is not the end. We will live again
30. I fear the thought of hell.
Hell is horrible indeed, but God's mercy endures forever
31. I am always sick, or hurt.
Yeshuah tenderly cares for you and sees your hurts and not only those in the body, but in the heart as well
32. I am deeply depressed.
Yes, my friend this is true. Have you a professional to talk to as well? You can be healed.
33. I am very lonely.
I send you a hug. Yeshuah is with you and you are never alone
34. Lincoln, Da Vinci, Newton....Who am I?
The precious beloved child of God. SO precious that Yeshuah shed His blood for love of you.
35. I am most always anxious and fearful.
Yeshuah's love will vanquish those fears

I give up, on everything. I am done
Now let God take over completely.

I love you dear friend even though I don't know you. I have walked as you do now, and i know life can be different and that it is the will of GOd that your life be different.

Please please feel free to PM me if you need or want to chat.

May Yeshuah show you his abundant love

 

[UnitynLove]

What a great post servantofyashuwa. Thank you for the insperation!!!


We have all fallen down at one time or another...not just physically but also emotionally. And picking yourself back up again is, unfortunately, easier said than done.
It doesn't take any special talent to give up, to lie down on the roadside of life and say, "I quit!" In fact, the road to chronic discouragement, hopelessness, and despair, often begins with an ordinary day that ends up piled high with simple disappointments.
According to Webster, to disappoint is "to fail to satisfy the hope, desire, or expectation of." In other words, when we set ourselves up to hope for something and that hope is not met, then we become disappointed. We feel let down and betrayed.
Let's face it—none of us is ever going to get to the place in life where we have no more disappointments. We can't expect to be sheltered from every little thing. Disappointment is a fact of life...one that must be dealt with. If not, discouragement and devastation are never far away.
Too often people end up devastated and don't understand why. They seemed to be going along just fine, and now they've fallen by the roadside without knowing how or why. Many people don't realize that the problem could have started a long time ago with simple disappointment that they failed to work through.
Deep hurt doesn't just come from huge disappointments, like when we fail to get the job or promotion we really wanted. Deep emotional hurt can even come from a series of minor annoyances and frustrations.
That's why we must know how to handle the small disappointments we encounter daily and keep them in perspective. Otherwise, they can get out of hand and be blown up out of proportion.
For example, imagine that you start out your day behind schedule, so you are already frustrated. On the way to the office, unexpected traffic delays cause you to be even later. Then when you finally get to work, you find out that someone on the job has been gossiping about you behind your back. You get some coffee to help you calm down, but you spill it all over yourself—only making matters worse since you have an important meeting with the boss and no time to change clothes!
Facing each of those little things separately is just annoying, but when they pile up together, it becomes almost more than you can bear. Then just about that time you get a report from the doctor that's not what you were hoping and praying for. And to top it all off, your fiancé calls and threatens to break off your engagement even though the wedding invitations have already been mailed!
How will you respond? Will you be full of faith? Or will you find yourself full of fear, and on that road to disappointment and discouragement? All of those minor frustrations and disappointments with the traffic, the office gossip, and the spilled coffee have set you up for a major calamity. And when you have to face some really serious problems like sickness or a failed relationship, you find that you don't have the means to deal with it—so you fall, plunging headlong into hopelessness and despair.
What are you to do when disappointment comes? When it weighs upon you like a rock, you can either let it press you down until you become discouraged and even devastated, or you can use it as a steppingstone to better things.
Learn to adapt and adjust. You can do it! Face the disappointment at its onset and be quick to make any adjustments required to remedy the situation. God has better things for you, and He will help you. He says in Hebrews 13:5, "...I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support...[I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down.... Instead of concentrating on your problems and getting discouraged, focus on God and meditate on His promises for you. Yes, you may have fallen down but you don't have to stay down. God is ready, willing and able to pick you up.

 

[Mayflower1]

Dear Appointed,

It is really good that you are getting your feelings out like this. Please realize though that with the proper steps you can overcome those things. How about make a list of everything that you are thankful for? I did that and it always helps me to feel better. You are very important and God loves you very much. I will pray for you and pm me anytime. I understand how you are feeling and God knows exactly how you feel. Best Wishes, Lily00 hug: