Having fights doesn't justify your wife for cheating on you. That is totally unacceptable and ungodly behavior...not to mention disrespectful and dishonoring of your marriage. I'm sorry to hear that your wife chose that option instead of trying to work things out with you by going to marital counseling.
All you can do now is draw closer to God and approach your wife with the suggestion of going to marital counseling. If she won't go, you can still benefit enormously by going to counseling for yourself. If nothing else, it will help you emotionally deal with everything and hopefully give you perspective of the situation. Above all else, may you find healing and forgiveness towards your wife and work through your anger of her betrayal.
Oftentimes, the knee-jerk reaction is to blame the other party. But if you can get counseling for yourself and just work on YOURSELF...you will see maybe how you contributed to the failure of the marriage and what you can do to improve yourself. It's never just one person's fault in a marriage. It takes two to create the mess. The healthy thing to do is take responsibility for your own faults and move forward from there. What's done is done, move forward now and allow the counselor to help you pick up the "pieces" and glue things back together, so to speak.
Be kind to your wife (even if you don't feel like it). Let her know that what she is doing is hurting you and the marriage. Acknowledge your own faults in the marriage and let her know that you want to work things out and that you want BOTH of you to go to marital counseling. That's the best you can do for now. Leave the rest up to God. Begin strengthening your walk with God and put your 100% security in Him and Him only.
No matter what happens, know that God loves you and will never leave you. There's a great radio program and book out that you can buy online. The radio program is called "New Life Live". They have callers that call in everyday with problems like yours. The book is called
Healing Is A Choice. You can order that online at:
www.newlife.com
I've heard nothing but wonderful things about that book. Also, they have a toll-free number where you can get counseling for free.
May God comfort you, give you wisdom and patience during this painful crossroad in your marriage.
Live, learn, grow and love...that is what life is all about!
