hello! I was wondering if somebody could please advise me... I have been learning about Christianity for a while now, and a little while ago now realised that everything that I had learnt was right, and I had found what I wanted to do with my life... It is hard, because there are so many things that I knew I would have to fight against, but I realised that I really don't think I can do this whole life thing without God, and learning about Jesus really made me sure that it is what I should be doing with my life. However, I have a problem... I've spoken to other Christians, and they tell me of experiences that I don't have - flashing light type experiences when the became Christians, feeling the Holy Spirit touch them when they are praying, and I guess feeling the Holy Spirit inside them... I really don't think that I've experienced any of these things. I have tried to turn back from my sin, try to build a relationship with God, pray and confess my sin, and so on, but I guess I just don't feel like a Christian. My Christian friends still view me as the "non-Christian", and that is weird and I don't understand why. I basically wonder if there is something that I am doing or not doing that is making me feel this way? Can anyone help, please? I know that I have such an incredible amount to learn, and currently know next to nothing about God and Jesus, but I'm trying so hard to learn, and based on what I do know, have decided that I want to become a Christian and tried.... I've tried so hard to do what I have learnt I should be doing/ not doing (not just trying not to commit sin, but confessing of it, trying to build a relationship with God, giving thanks, etc.). I just don't know what I am doing wrong. Can anybody please help/ advise? Thank you.
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I don't feel like a Christian!
- Thread starter WendyMedic
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chilehed
Veteran
Relax, being a Christian isn't about what you feel, it's about who you know. Which is good, because feelings are SO fickle. Read your Bible, pray, and find a good church.
How do you know a church is "good"? Well, opinions differ, lots of times I hear people say something like "find one that feels right" or "find one that follows the Word of God", which makes sense only if I know I'm feeling healthy feelings or if I know that I'm not deceiving myself about what the Bible is saying.
I struggled with this for a long time - you can see where I ended up...
www.catholic.com
How do you know a church is "good"? Well, opinions differ, lots of times I hear people say something like "find one that feels right" or "find one that follows the Word of God", which makes sense only if I know I'm feeling healthy feelings or if I know that I'm not deceiving myself about what the Bible is saying.
I struggled with this for a long time - you can see where I ended up...
www.catholic.com
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TCapp
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There simply are not "big feelings" involved for every person who turns to Christ. Sometimes there are, sometimes not. It might just depend on your individual makeup.
You don't need to beat yourself up over it. I know having feelings are nice, but they are not always necessary and choices shouldn't just be based on feelings. Keep learning, keep worshiping, keep loving God . . . and maybe feelings will follow eventually. But if they don't, it is perfectly okay.
You don't need to beat yourself up over it. I know having feelings are nice, but they are not always necessary and choices shouldn't just be based on feelings. Keep learning, keep worshiping, keep loving God . . . and maybe feelings will follow eventually. But if they don't, it is perfectly okay.
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Wendy,
Not everyone has the "flash of light" when they become a Christian. The only time I have "felt the Holy Spirit" moving through me was when I went to confession. I feel God moving through me in different ways though. I get the passion and desire to study religion and theology. The passion is very intense, so intense so that if I try to ignore it, it gets even stronger. When I have ignored God's calling to me to go to seminary, the desire in me grows. I have finally submitted and decided I will go to seminary, when I finish my college education (I have to have a bachelor's before I can go). Everyone experiences God in different ways. There is no one "right way" to feel when you become a Christian. Some people feel an overpowering feeling of the Holy Spirit. Some break down and cry, and others, they don't have these at all, but still know with all their heart and soul that they believe in God/Jesus. The believe with all their heart and soul that God/Jesus is their Lord and Saviour.
Your friends are doing you a disservice when they tell you that you are not a Christian. Who are they to judge? God judges our hearts, not your friends. Do not think you are doing anything wrong. We are all sinners. Not just some of us. If we no longer were sinners because we became Christian, then we would not longer need Christ.
Let me ask you this, why is it that you do not feel like a Christian?
Yours in Christ,
Jen
Not everyone has the "flash of light" when they become a Christian. The only time I have "felt the Holy Spirit" moving through me was when I went to confession. I feel God moving through me in different ways though. I get the passion and desire to study religion and theology. The passion is very intense, so intense so that if I try to ignore it, it gets even stronger. When I have ignored God's calling to me to go to seminary, the desire in me grows. I have finally submitted and decided I will go to seminary, when I finish my college education (I have to have a bachelor's before I can go). Everyone experiences God in different ways. There is no one "right way" to feel when you become a Christian. Some people feel an overpowering feeling of the Holy Spirit. Some break down and cry, and others, they don't have these at all, but still know with all their heart and soul that they believe in God/Jesus. The believe with all their heart and soul that God/Jesus is their Lord and Saviour.
Your friends are doing you a disservice when they tell you that you are not a Christian. Who are they to judge? God judges our hearts, not your friends. Do not think you are doing anything wrong. We are all sinners. Not just some of us. If we no longer were sinners because we became Christian, then we would not longer need Christ.
Let me ask you this, why is it that you do not feel like a Christian?
Yours in Christ,
Jen
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ydouxist
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I think your trying too hard. All you need to do first is ask God to forgive you.
Pray the Lords Prayer. When Jesus died on the cross He said, "It is finished."
Grace is unmerited favor. No one deserves it. It's free. Ask God to bring Godly people into your life. Ones who will encourage and disciple you.
Ask God for your own experiences. Jesus said, "You are my witnesses."
Without tests we won't have testimonies.
Pray the Lords Prayer. When Jesus died on the cross He said, "It is finished."
Grace is unmerited favor. No one deserves it. It's free. Ask God to bring Godly people into your life. Ones who will encourage and disciple you.
Ask God for your own experiences. Jesus said, "You are my witnesses."
Without tests we won't have testimonies.
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Rafael
Only time enough for love
I don't like to ask what group of Christians would treat you as if you are not a Christian based on what you have said about feelings, but I have an idea that you may be associated with a cult if they are mistreating you and making you feel inadequate in the manner you described. You may have to find a different group to fellowship with. As the others have stated, your faith cannot be based on feelings, but what your conscience and heart tells you the truth is about God and His Son Jesus from the message of the good news (the gospel of Jesus Christ).
Read the Bible, pray and seek God, trusting your own sincereity in trying to know Him more. He will see and hear if you truly seek Him and ask in prayer. You can't really rely on other people's experience for truth in your own life. They may exaggerate or even lie about their experience just to impress you or others. The world is dangerous with many counterfeits, so trust your own heart and efforts to know and understand God. This doesn't mean you cannot learn from other people who have been Christians for a long time, but even they cannot forge a relationship for you with the Lord. Ask Him to watch over your comings and goings, and try to do the things you know that please God - such as faithfulness, kindness, and service to others. It takes a lifetime, but that is what life is for - to know God through His own Son Jesus and to grow in the love He showed us with His life given. I will pray that God send you good Christian fellowship and a invitation to a group of true believers In Christ who will help you grow.
Read the Bible, pray and seek God, trusting your own sincereity in trying to know Him more. He will see and hear if you truly seek Him and ask in prayer. You can't really rely on other people's experience for truth in your own life. They may exaggerate or even lie about their experience just to impress you or others. The world is dangerous with many counterfeits, so trust your own heart and efforts to know and understand God. This doesn't mean you cannot learn from other people who have been Christians for a long time, but even they cannot forge a relationship for you with the Lord. Ask Him to watch over your comings and goings, and try to do the things you know that please God - such as faithfulness, kindness, and service to others. It takes a lifetime, but that is what life is for - to know God through His own Son Jesus and to grow in the love He showed us with His life given. I will pray that God send you good Christian fellowship and a invitation to a group of true believers In Christ who will help you grow.
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William Nunn
Babies enjoy living too!
Wendy Medic, the fact alone that you are tryig to foster a relationship with the Lord is should be evidence enough for you that you are a Christian. Those who are not saved do not have a thought for the things of the Lord, but you obviously do. So don't take to heart what your contemporaries say and follow the path you are on, which seems to be growing and prospering in the Lord's service.
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I agree Wendy, this is your personal relationship with God, no one else will be able to tell how your relationship is with God. The bible explains that 'God is love' and 'those who know love, know God' as your relationship with Him deepens, you will feel his love enter into your life and in your heart, but we have to be open to receiving this love. You obviously are, it will happen!
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Thanks everyone for your messages. They've helped a lot. In response to the questions that have been asked:
aanjt: I don't feel like a Christian, I guess, because a)I've not had these experiences/ felt the way other people say they have felt; and b) I don't feel that different to what I did before.. I guess it maybe because me deciding this has been quite a gradual thing, but even still, it seems like I don't feel the way others feel.. I omehow feel as if there's something I'm doing or not doing which is causing me not to be a Christian, in everyones eyes, including Gods.
Raphe: no, my friends are definately not assocaited with a cult. I guess it's always just been they are "the Chrsitian ones" and they don't seem to want to change that... I also think it's cos quite often I've been out with them and kissed random guys, which they wouldn't have done... I really find it hard, because they almost expect me to go off and sleep with them, which I wouldn't do anyway, even if I wasn't a Christian, because it's not me at all. I think that's one thing that might make it hard for them to accept that I might be a Christian... they think I'm a bit of a slag, and can't put that with Christianity. I'm thinking this might be the reason, but I'm not sure. Anyway, they always want to challenge me if I say that I am a Christian... I'm not sure why, but it does confuse me, as I think I must be doing somethng wrong if my own friends are saying this....
Thanks everyone for all your help.
Wendy
aanjt: I don't feel like a Christian, I guess, because a)I've not had these experiences/ felt the way other people say they have felt; and b) I don't feel that different to what I did before.. I guess it maybe because me deciding this has been quite a gradual thing, but even still, it seems like I don't feel the way others feel.. I omehow feel as if there's something I'm doing or not doing which is causing me not to be a Christian, in everyones eyes, including Gods.
Raphe: no, my friends are definately not assocaited with a cult. I guess it's always just been they are "the Chrsitian ones" and they don't seem to want to change that... I also think it's cos quite often I've been out with them and kissed random guys, which they wouldn't have done... I really find it hard, because they almost expect me to go off and sleep with them, which I wouldn't do anyway, even if I wasn't a Christian, because it's not me at all. I think that's one thing that might make it hard for them to accept that I might be a Christian... they think I'm a bit of a slag, and can't put that with Christianity. I'm thinking this might be the reason, but I'm not sure. Anyway, they always want to challenge me if I say that I am a Christian... I'm not sure why, but it does confuse me, as I think I must be doing somethng wrong if my own friends are saying this....
Thanks everyone for all your help.
Wendy
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S
StuckRags
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God doesn't respond to forumulas. He responds to your heart. The one of the shortest prayers He will respond to is, "help."
I had no "feelings." I can't really even remember the day I got saved. I just got saved and continued with my bible studies.
The woman in Matt 15:22 who called Jesus "Lord, Son of David" was not a Jew herself (she was Caananite, who were despised by Jews), but heard what the Jews were calling Him. He didnt' respond to that. It was just a manipulation on her part to get Jesus to do something. He then gave her some tough sayings to get her to reveal her heart of faith to Him. Only then did he do what she wanted.
Get real with Jesus, He'll get real with you.
I had no "feelings." I can't really even remember the day I got saved. I just got saved and continued with my bible studies.
The woman in Matt 15:22 who called Jesus "Lord, Son of David" was not a Jew herself (she was Caananite, who were despised by Jews), but heard what the Jews were calling Him. He didnt' respond to that. It was just a manipulation on her part to get Jesus to do something. He then gave her some tough sayings to get her to reveal her heart of faith to Him. Only then did he do what she wanted.
Get real with Jesus, He'll get real with you.
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Sorry, I don't understand what u mean... how do I need to "get real". Do u think I'm trying to do something manipulative? Thanks for your help...
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I find it upsetting when some people feel that in order to be a believer and follower of Christ that you must fit this cookie cutter mold. I found in my experience that the one's that don't quite 'fit in' are the ones with the most love for God and love for others, maybe because they know what it's like to be treated differently for not fitting in, I don't know.
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just keep doing what you're doing. I'm one of those people who has the "emotional makeup", and until I get into a steady habit of reading God's Word, praying, and genuinely repenting from sin, I go completely nuts doubting my salvation, having evil thoughts, etc. etc. It's being close to God that gives peace to those people you're talking about, and the closer you get to Him the more peace and love you'll have in your life. draw near to Him and He'll draw near to you, and maybe if you're like me you'll find that peace and love.
otherwise, don't sweat it. if you know you're saved and lean on God for guidance, you'll start growing in Christ, no matter what the devil may throw at you- and he's probably hitting you with doubt right now. i struggled with this too, but once I repented and went to God, it turned out all right. hope it does for you, too
otherwise, don't sweat it. if you know you're saved and lean on God for guidance, you'll start growing in Christ, no matter what the devil may throw at you- and he's probably hitting you with doubt right now. i struggled with this too, but once I repented and went to God, it turned out all right. hope it does for you, too
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StuckRags
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No, no, not at all. I'm just saying you may get quite a bit of advice from people that say, "pray THIS prayer." Or were you sure to say THIS or THAT when you prayed? As you have been led astray by the believers you mentioned in your intial post, you may be led astray further by believers that try to put words into your mouth as far as prayers or your relationship with God goes.WendyMedic said:
"Get real" means be honest with yourself AND God in your discussions with God. Sometimes, instead of saying to God what we really WANT to say like, "Lord, my life is screwed up and I'm wondering why you are not here to fix it," we say, "Lord, your will be done," because this is what we hear other Christians tell us to say to God. Or we think we are to just say that because that is what the Lord's Prayer says. God wants your heart, not perfect words.
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- Dec 25, 2003
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One of the greatest misconceptions about Christianity is that it is a feeling. If we believe what the Bible says and What Christ says in the bible, then we know that our relationship with Jesus Christ does not change according to how we feel.
Our thoughts determine our feelings, so you must meditate on God's truth.
Our thoughts determine our feelings, so you must meditate on God's truth.
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I know the way you feel, my conversin was nothing remarkable, very quiet and private, no flashes no anvil lifted off of me, none of that happened till years later. And as for your friends, they probably just aren't used to the idea yet that you are christian, everything takes time, but trust me, follow God and it will all come in good time... His time.
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PRMan
Part-Time Bible Scholar
Also, realize that Christians are selfish and sinful too. Your friends probably feel better than you because you've been the "sinner" (in their eyes) and they haven't. This is a horrible attitude for Christians to have, but unfortunately is not uncommon.
They should be rejoicing that you are striving to follow Christ, not hindering you. I agree that you should not worry about them and try to find a church you like.
They should be rejoicing that you are striving to follow Christ, not hindering you. I agree that you should not worry about them and try to find a church you like.
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WendyMedic,
Many Catholic Churches are open during the day, for people to go in and simply pray in silence and in serenity.
You just go in, and have a seat, and talk to God.
(I'm not saying go to the Sunday Mass.)
Go during the week when nothing is going on inside.
Bring your Bible to read, if that is comfortable for you, but I really believe you will benefit greatly if it is just you and God.
Rest in the Lord.
1 Kings 19:11-13
And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the LORD.
And, behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD; but the LORD was not in the wind:
and after the wind an earthquake; but the LORD was not in the earthquake:
And after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire:
and after the fire a still small voice.
And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah?
Here are the locations of Catholic Churches throughout the USA. (Are you in the USA?) You can call to see if the building is open during weekdays.
http://www.masstimes.org/ASP/
Peace be with you.
.
Many Catholic Churches are open during the day, for people to go in and simply pray in silence and in serenity.
You just go in, and have a seat, and talk to God.
(I'm not saying go to the Sunday Mass.)
Go during the week when nothing is going on inside.
Bring your Bible to read, if that is comfortable for you, but I really believe you will benefit greatly if it is just you and God.
Rest in the Lord.
1 Kings 19:11-13
And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the LORD.
And, behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD; but the LORD was not in the wind:
and after the wind an earthquake; but the LORD was not in the earthquake:
And after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire:
and after the fire a still small voice.
And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah?
Here are the locations of Catholic Churches throughout the USA. (Are you in the USA?) You can call to see if the building is open during weekdays.
http://www.masstimes.org/ASP/
Peace be with you.
.
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