I can't stop backsliding

[Deeanonymous]

Please someone help
I'm 15 years old female and I always always backslide it needs to stop cause its getting to a point where I feel so guilty I don't wanna go to church and feel like I want to self harm and cut my self and it's getting really out of hand :'( im so fed up with it
It's been ongoing since I was 9 I was left home alone once an I was on the computer and a ad came up on a pornography site and let's just say I've been addicted to pornography for a while now but I always feel disgusting after I watch it and it's ruining me as I always feel people are going to find out and laugh and mock at me
However one day I went to a convention called FOL and that was when I was about 11 and it really really saved me I felt so alive and re sparked in God even my parents said I was glowing and looking like something great has happened to me. Unfortunately ive relapsed and backslid so many times I just want to feel that happy and glowing again.
I always repent and say to God that I'll try harder but I end up backsliding once again and it's got me really depressed and down in life
Someone please help me

 

[Bible2]

Deeanonymous said in post 1:

I always repent and say to God that I'll try harder but I end up backsliding once again and it's got me really depressed and down in life

Regarding "I always repent", repenting from a sin (for example, Acts 8:22; 2 Corinthians 12:21, Revelation 3:19), means to change one's mind regarding that sin, in the sense of having no plans to ever commit it again, knowing that God has made it possible for believers not to sin (John 8:34-36, Romans 8:2-14, Romans 6:1-23, 2 Corinthians 7:1), even if they are tempted to do so (2 Peter 2:9, Matthew 6:13; 1 Corinthians 10:13, 1 Corinthians 9:27, Romans 8:13, Galatians 5:16).

But if, sometime after repenting from a sin, believers nonetheless wrongly employ their free will to commit that sin again, this does not mean that they had not previously repented from that sin, or that they as continued believers in Jesus Christ and his gospel are not saved. What they need to do is repent from that sin again and confess it to God, and they will be completely forgiven (1 John 1:9, compare Luke 17:4).

Satan wants believers to fail to continue to come to Jesus, to think that it is hopeless, that they are just too evil for Jesus, when in fact Jesus is waiting with open arms to forgive them for their sins which weigh down on them so heavily (Matthew 11:28-30).

 

[Spiritlight]

Dee hun take it easy!

When you accepted Jesus as saviour all sins past and present were taken care of so you cant improve salvation in any way by strict adherence of laws.

God knew you cant adhere fully to the high standard he wants people to live by (which is a perfect life) so he sent Jesus to take our place where the punishment was involved and the price had to be paid for us to go to heaven.

You have Jesus now so dont worry the stuff you did wrong and will do wrong is forgiven, just try to improve your life a little step at a time each day and that will please God.

The christian walk is a bit like getting into a shower when you are all dirty and covered in sin. The dirt will come off if you stay in there long enough and scrub. You do not take a bath before you take a shower do you? In the same way you cannot enter into christianity all clean and perfect. It's a bit like thinking you need to take a bath before your clean enough to get get into a shower!

It's ok Dee we are all like you we stuff up too, even the pastor at your church does too.

Enjoy the shower called Christianity that will eventually clean you up a lot. Bear in mind it may take years so dont be hard on yourself!

If you are mean to yourself with criticism it will not improve anything and it will certainly not make you any more worthy of salvation.

Go have fun and play with your friends with a smile on your face and enjoy life!

 

[Deeanonymous]

Thank yo so much your words if kindness have really helped me to build up my happiness and faith Im so grateful and I will try if I ever fall again there's always another chance and you've made me realize that thank you so much :3 God Bless You

Dee

 

[If Not For Grace]

sometimes a change in focus is all that's needed. If we focus on what we "should" be doing, like learning how much God Loves Us and how and why we are to love others AS ourselves we get better. When we go about doing good and being happy about doing so, we have less time to become engrossed in activities that may not be beneficial for us. It's like food-eat what is healthy FOR you instead of focusing on what is "forbidden".

It's a shift in thinking that takes people a bit to realize it will Change your life. All children fall down as they learn to walk, then after a bit they just quit falling as they get steady on their feet. Your ok-just keep your balance, little by little we go far.

 

[parsley]

Start listening to your mind, to see how often you do things out of fear that people will criticize you. People can be very critical. Many times they are the wrong ones, not the people they are criticizing.

I was noticing pliability in myself this week -- I would listen to a piece of news, then allow my mind to head toward a group I wanted to agree with... do I believe it's true or decide to be skeptical... would my Christian friends think I'm off the wall for believing that...

I'm not suggesting you get even more overcome with analyzing and scrutinizing. But start allowing yourself to be yourself -- as though the purest form of You is not wrong. Don't let other people set the standards for who you should be.

God created you good. You are righteous in His eyes because of the sacrifice Jesus made for you.

It is one thing to be obedient to Christ, and another to ride up and down with the whims of other believers. Christians believe a lot of things, and they don't necessarily agree. The church can be a great support, but should not be our god. Your core is in the Lord... He makes things more straightforward and clear.

 

[asiyreh]

The trick is to learn the difference between the encouragement of the Holy spirit

and

The accusations of Satan.

The Holy spirit will sound like - Ok Dee, Let's have a look at these areas we need to change in your life. Let's destroy this issue first, then slowly on and on. He will strengthen you and build you up.

Satan will sound like - Hissssss Dee you're not Holy like these other Christians here, they're soooo good but you're really evil (lies and more lies).
You sin all day long. Christ doesn't love you, you're too sinful Dee. You'll never get into his kingdom with all your flaws. (He is a liar and the father of it - John 8:44)

Christ tells us:
But do not think I will accuse you before the Father. Your accuser is Moses (or the law), on whom your hopes are set. John 5:45

Satan literally translates "The accuser" and will use the Law, God's Law as a weapon against you.

This is not to say you shouldn't continue to transform into the image Christ wants for your life. The image of Christ. The law is a great template for you to use in this task.

Or Paul's messages on the fruits of the Spirit, if your church is a more liberal church.

Think about it like this. We know how Christ behaved when he lived in his own body. If he lives now in you, how do you think he wants you to behave?

But it's a learning process missee. Be at peace.

Let's have a look at the Christian process to help you understand:-

(1)Justification happens in a second. Christ chooses you for all time. Boom it's done
(2)Sanctification the walk of a lifetime, a daily transformation, as you come closer and closer to Christ and will never finish till you're
(3)Glorified in Christ. Only at stage 3 will you achieve complete and eternal victory over sin.

And don't forget to breathe.

 

[Peripatetic]

asiyreh's advice is spot on... it's always good to ask ourselves, "is this conviction that encourages or accusation that condemns?" It's a good way to sense where the message is coming from.

John 3:16 is probably the most famous verse in the Bible, but we often forget what follows it:

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. -John 3:17

 

[Suenell]

I was seduced by pornography for many years. It happened after I was in my 30s. But when I realized it wasn't right, that God wouldn't want me to engage myself in it, I stopped. Anytime I'd feel drawn toward it, I'd go get my Bible or other decent reading material to read or study my cookbooks looking for a new recipe (I'm now vegan too). I destroyed all my movies, magazines & books that had anything to do with pornography. I even stopped watching ALL secular TV. MOST of it is very bad & will feed the desires to do or think wrong things!

I now have Christian or classical music that I listen to & I am learning good gospel songs. I avoid all things that would lead me away to doing wrong. The more you can get away from the worldly things, the better you'll be.

Keep going to church even if you don't feel like it. Find someone to befriend & call them every few days to chat.

Keep your mind on this passage;

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Keep praying & studying God's Word. Do a Bible study. Refuse to listen to Satan's temptations. Stand on God's Truth & His Alone.

God bless you!

 

[Emmy]

Dear Deeanonymous. It seems to me that you are trying to stay strong in your own strenght. You need Jesus to help you and give you strenght to resist. Jesus told us to "ask and ye sall receive." ( Matthew 7: 7-8 Jesus will also give us His Love and Joy, and the Holy Spirit will empower us with His Love, also. Keep asking God to help you stop backsliding, then thank God and notice how your strenght to resist your backsliding, grows and grows.
Jesus will always help and guide us, JESUS IS THE WAY. You may stumble from time to time, but then ask God to forgive you, and carry on praying for help to stop you backsliding.
God will never MAKE us do things, we must keep asking and praying.
In Matthew 22: 35-40: Jesus gives us more loving advice: " Love God with all our hearts and all our souls, And Love our neighbour as we love ourselves.
( neighbour being all we know and all we meet) " To Love and Obey, and with God on our side, there is Nothing we cannot do, Deeanomymous.
I say this with love. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.

 

[parsley]

Matthew 7: 7-8 Jesus will also give us His Love and Joy, and the Holy Spirit will empower us with His Love, also. Keep asking God to help you stop backsliding, then thank God and notice how your strenght to resist your backsliding, grows and grows.
Jesus will always help and guide us, JESUS IS THE WAY. You may stumble from time to time, but then ask God to forgive you, and carry on praying for help... In Matthew 22: 35-40: Jesus gives us more loving advice: " Love God with all our hearts and all our souls, And Love our neighbour as we love ourselves.

Next time you're drawn to it, try to picture what the person does during a normal day -- laundry, sending kids off to school. Jesus would care about those mundane things. Pray for the actual person -- is it hard for them to get another job, break away from people, start a new life.

Pornography might seem empowering in some ways, but it also robs human dignity, so it is training your brain to think less of yourself. Then it is hard to see how much God might care about you tenderly, patiently -- without wanting something in return.