I can’t seem to overcome this!

[Faith over Fear]

I am sick and tired of failing to stop self harming. I can’t tell anyone in my personal circle about my problems because I’m a target. People are already trying as hard as they can to trash my name. Lord knows I’ve got enough dirt on my name!! I was Leary about sharing stuff here on CF at first but I feel better about that now. I don’t feel anyone on here is out to hurt my reputation. I’ve learned to swallow some pride and say hey, thing’s aren’t OK. I’ve got problems!!!

I want to stop self harming so BADLY!!! I can’t get a grip on it!!!! I feel so hopeless about it!
I’m tired of being afraid. I feel so defeated.

“The voice of fear”

Fear tells me I’m not enough.
I’ll never quite measure up.

Fear tells me I’m to screwed up.
I’m down and I can’t get up.

Fear tells me I’m trash,
And reminds me of my trying past.

Fear tells me there’s a way to cope,
Saying self harm is my only hope.

Fear tells me to end my life,
Cause, I’m just not worth the fight.

Fear is so deceiving,
It even has me believing.

Fear your making me lose my mind,
Peace and joy I wish to find.

The voice of fear is Satans voice.
It starts the thought, you make the choice.

My heart is heavy , no rest I find.
My God,My God hear me this time.

I can’t go on , I need your touch.
I know I’ve asked this far to much.

Lord you owe me nothing.
But I humbly ask for this one thing.

If you do or don’t I’ll understand ,
I’m just begging for your saving hand.

I’ve shed so many tears,
Please save me from the voice of fear!!!!
———————————————————————-

Please pray God moves on my situation. I can’t go on like this. I feel like I’m failing God every time I self harm. I hope I didn’t place any trigger words in this. I tried to keep it clean!

Thanks- Little Sister-

 

[dogs4thewin]

Things you can do to de-escalate and divert an emergency

The best way to use this list is to pick a few that work for you and write them onto a piece of paper that you will keep with you. Often during times when youll need to remember these, you might forget thema list is handy! Also, as each person is different, it needs to be understood that...

www.christianforums.com

try these things

Also it may help to say I will self harm after X (usually when you are finished with X the urge has lessened or gone away. )

Another tip if you are somewhere where self harm is not an option meaning in public and so you will need to go to the bathroom or back to your room ECT try taking a round about way to get there what this does is just like waiting until you complete X it takes longer which may allow the urge to decrease in the meantime.

 

[Faith over Fear]

Things you can do to de-escalate and divert an emergency

The best way to use this list is to pick a few that work for you and write them onto a piece of paper that you will keep with you. Often during times when youll need to remember these, you might forget thema list is handy! Also, as each person is different, it needs to be understood that...

www.christianforums.com

try these things

Also it may help to say I will self harm after X (usually when you are finished with X the urge has lessened or gone away. )

Another tip if you are somewhere where self harm is not an option meaning in public and so you will need to go to the bathroom or back to your room ECT try taking a round about way to get there what this does is just like waiting until you complete X it takes longer which may allow the urge to decrease in the meantime.

Thank you

 

[Richard T]

Hi, I hope it is Ok to give your poem a new turn. God bless always!

The voice of faith

Faith tells me the gift is quite enough
that I accepted Christ by his great touch

Faith tells me that I have made the grade,
And when I stumble I can still get up today.

Faith tells me I am worthy now
It is set in heaven like a perfect vow.

My path erased and cleansed by the blood
It makes my joy arise like a flood.

Faith assures me I am so loved
that a man from heaven calls me his beloved.

Faith assures me there is a way to cope
It comes from Jesus and his great hope.

Faith assures me an abundant life
Jesus' love shows me I am worth the fight.

Faith is so believing
It gets me to receiving

That the things of God I claim
Giving glory to God, not shame

The mind of Christ I have
Gives me peace and even a laugh

The voice of faith is from the rhema word
It cannot lie, it is so secure

My burden is light, His rest I find
My God hears me, each and every time

Its true I often need your touch
But its a small thing to believe God so much

As he cares so much, even for a dove,
that when I call, he listens with love.

God owes me nothing, yet he still cares
Jesus showed me this with his tears.

A bruised reed He will not crush
God understand my frame and such

Little sister God loves you so
that he will never let you go

Surely victory you will achieve
Not by works but through what's meant to be

Thank you for your sharing here
I pray you know Jesus is always near.

Change fast or slow, only God can know
But don't give up as you will surely grow.

 

[Faith over Fear]

Hi, I hope it is Ok to give your poem a new turn. God bless always!

The voice of faith

Faith tells me the gift is quite enough
that I accepted Christ by his great touch

Faith tells me that I have made the grade,
And when I stumble I can still get up today.

Faith tells me I am worthy now
It is set in heaven like a perfect vow.

My path erased and cleansed by the blood
It makes my joy arise like a flood.

Faith assures me I am so loved
that a man from heaven calls me his beloved.

Faith assures me there is a way to cope
It comes from Jesus and his great hope.

Faith assures me an abundant life
Jesus' love shows me I am worth the fight.

Faith is so believing
It gets me to receiving

That the things of God I claim
Giving glory to God, not shame

The mind of Christ I have
Gives me peace and even a laugh

The voice of faith is from the rhema word
It cannot lie, it is so secure

My burden is light, His rest I find
My God hears me, each and every time

Its true I often need your touch
But its a small thing to believe God so much

As he cares so much, even for a dove,
that when I call, he listens with love.

God owes me nothing, yet he still cares
Jesus showed me this with his tears.

A bruised reed He will not crush
God understand my frame and such

Little sister God loves you so
that he will never let you go

Surely victory you will achieve
Not by works but through what's meant to be

Thank you for your sharing here
I pray you know Jesus is always near.

Change fast or slow, only God can know
But don't give up as you will surely grow.

Oh that is so beautiful….. I long for the day I feel and think that way. At this point I can’t see how God could love someone like me. I fail him daily. I can’t hang up the stupid knife!!

Thanks- it was truly a blessing!!!

 

[Yusuphhai]

 

[Richard T]

Oh that is so beautiful….. I long for the day I feel and think that way. At this point I can’t see how God could love someone like me. I fail him daily. I can’t hang up the stupid knife!!

Thanks- it was truly a blessing!!!

The only way you fail God is when you cease to try. It really is the word of God with the Holy Spirit as teacher that can help you change. We can't do it on our own. Many of those lines are scriptural. There are so many promises in the word. I pray you can begin to let God give you more hope, a better image of yourself and Him, so that you can really turn a corner and never look back. Try reading something like this free pdf from the late T.L. Osborn. "You are God's best. The free pdf is in part of the title; "The gospel.ng,

 

[Faith over Fear]

The only way you fail God is when you cease to try. It really is the word of God with the Holy Spirit as teacher that can help you change. We can't do it on our own. Many of those lines are scriptural. There are so many promises in the word. I pray you can begin to let God give you more hope, a better image of yourself and Him, so that you can really turn a corner and never look back. Try reading something like this free pdf from the late T.L. Osborn. "You are God's best. The free pdf is in part of the title; "The gospel.ng,

I try and try!! I feel like I need someone watching me 24/7!!!! ….
I can’t control myself… I need God to strengthen me so badly!!!!!!!!!!!


Thank you—-
God bless you!!

 

[Mari17]

I try and try!! I feel like I need someone watching me 24/7!!!! ….
I can’t control myself… I need God to strengthen me so badly!!!!!!!!!!!


Thank you—-
God bless you!!

I have OCD without the self harm piece, so I don't feel qualified to give advice about that, but I did want to say that I care, and also let you know about a good support group that I am part of. It's a private Facebook group called Christianity and Anxiety Disorders, and you may be able to find some support and encouragement for the fear/anxiety part of your struggles.

 

[Faith over Fear]

I have OCD without the self harm piece, so I don't feel qualified to give advice about that, but I did want to say that I care, and also let you know about a good support group that I am part of. It's a private Facebook group called Christianity and Anxiety Disorders, and you may be able to find some support and encouragement for the fear/anxiety part of your struggles.

I don’t have Facebook anymore. I couldn’t handle it. I was comparing myself to everyone else all the time. It wasn’t doing me
any good.

Thanks
God bless you!!!
-Hannah-

 

[Mari17]

I don’t have Facebook anymore. I couldn’t handle it. I was comparing myself to everyone else all the time. It wasn’t doing me
any good.

Thanks
God bless you!!!
-Hannah-

I understand. Please feel free to reach out any time! I would be happy to talk with you via private message, if that would be helpful. I love your name, by the way...I have a family member with that name!

 

[Faith over Fear]

I understand. Please feel free to reach out any time! I would be happy to talk with you via private message, if that would be helpful. I love your name, by the way...I have a family member with that name!

Awe.. thanks…
I am sincerely giving it my all this week. I gave the preacher at the church I attended today my knife. My goal is to make this week without self harming. I generally self harm everyday… so it is definitely a challenge….

 

[TPop]

I am sick and tired of failing to stop self harming. I can’t tell anyone in my personal circle about my problems because I’m a target. People are already trying as hard as they can to trash my name. Lord knows I’ve got enough dirt on my name!! I was Leary about sharing stuff here on CF at first but I feel better about that now. I don’t feel anyone on here is out to hurt my reputation. I’ve learned to swallow some pride and say hey, thing’s aren’t OK. I’ve got problems!!!

I want to stop self harming so BADLY!!! I can’t get a grip on it!!!! I feel so hopeless about it!
I’m tired of being afraid. I feel so defeated.

“The voice of fear”

Fear tells me I’m not enough.
I’ll never quite measure up.

Fear tells me I’m to screwed up.
I’m down and I can’t get up.

Fear tells me I’m trash,
And reminds me of my trying past.

Fear tells me there’s a way to cope,
Saying self harm is my only hope.

Fear tells me to end my life,
Cause, I’m just not worth the fight.

Fear is so deceiving,
It even has me believing.

Fear your making me lose my mind,
Peace and joy I wish to find.

The voice of fear is Satans voice.
It starts the thought, you make the choice.

My heart is heavy , no rest I find.
My God,My God hear me this time.

I can’t go on , I need your touch.
I know I’ve asked this far to much.

Lord you owe me nothing.
But I humbly ask for this one thing.

If you do or don’t I’ll understand ,
I’m just begging for your saving hand.

I’ve shed so many tears,
Please save me from the voice of fear!!!!
———————————————————————-

Please pray God moves on my situation. I can’t go on like this. I feel like I’m failing God every time I self harm. I hope I didn’t place any trigger words in this. I tried to keep it clean!

Thanks- Little Sister-

It is 100% training. I am guessing, your parents did not train you well. That is on them.

But now you're an adult. You have to train. So start training. Set an alarm on your phone twice a day to alert your to read 10 verses. Then after 3 days, change it to 4 times a day. Set the alarm for when you are not tired. Like 9am, noon, 4 pm, 7pm.

Set an alarm to self-harm yourself. Once per day at the end of the day when you are tired. Say 10 pm or when you go to bed. Start telling yourself you're too tired to do it. Too tired. Too late. Too anything you can think of.

Train yourself! Everything is training or lack of it!

Peace and Blessings

 

[Faith over Fear]

It is 100% training. I am guessing, your parents did not train you well. That is on them.

But now you're an adult. You have to train. So start training. Set an alarm on your phone twice a day to alert your to read 10 verses. Then after 3 days, change it to 4 times a day. Set the alarm for when you are not tired. Like 9am, noon, 4 pm, 7pm.

Set an alarm to self-harm yourself. Once per day at the end of the day when you are tired. Say 10 pm or when you go to bed. Start telling yourself you're too tired to do it. Too tired. Too late. Too anything you can think of.

Train yourself! Everything is training or lack of it!

Peace and Blessings

Thanks, my alarm is set!
And your guess is correct my parents did NOT do a great job at training up children. My parents taught us it’s cool to get drunk, take drugs and etc… but I don’t blame them for anything (anymore) they aren’t Christians I can’t expect much from them. You mentioned in your post “ but now you’re an adult”. I sure don’t feel like one… I haven’t reached that transition in life where I feel like an adult. As rough as home life is, I still like the feeling of my parents be around even though we don’t really speak or anything.

Anyway,
God bless you

 

[TPop]

Thanks, my alarm is set!
And your guess is correct my parents did NOT do a great job at training up children. My parents taught us it’s cool to get drunk, take drugs and etc… but I don’t blame them for anything (anymore) they aren’t Christians I can’t expect much from them. You mentioned in your post “ but now you’re an adult”. I sure don’t feel like one… I haven’t reached that transition in life where I feel like an adult. As rough as home life is, I still like the feeling of my parents be around even though we don’t really speak or anything.

Anyway,
God bless you

It takes time. I was 25, drinking like crazy, partying, irresponsible, a real zero.
I slowly improved.

But had someone helped me with training I might have done it, and accomplished it faster. It's just about training in the little things. Because then the big things are that much easier to do the right thing in.

I told my kids. You can 'train' yourself by saying the F-bomb in every sentence when you are talking a lot and in 5 minutes you can make a trained habit that can take hours to days to stop fully. Training!

I don't particularly enjoy or like flossing my teeth. But I am training myself to do it before I brush. Because it is good for my gums, and I should do it. Training.

Then, after a couple of weeks. It is a habit. And you have to exert energy to go against it. YOU can train yourself to do good things, respond in healthy ways, and not self-harm. Remember, comes in many forms. Starts in the brain telling yourself untruths. I suck, I deserve this, I'm a loser, etc. Those are Satan's words coming from your own heart. Don't do it. Don't spiral down into self-harmful forms. Blossom up. Plant a new flower each day that shows even just a fractional improvement. Days later, weeks, months, years, you will have a garden behind you. Self-harm is hard to do. You had to train over the training in your brain telling you not to do it. Now you have to go back to that. And it is about training. New healthy trained habits are what you are looking for.

A few successes in trained habits and your life changes, noticeably. And over time. Significantly.

Peace and Blessings

 

[Faith over Fear]

It is 100% training. I am guessing, your parents did not train you well. That is on them.

But now you're an adult. You have to train. So start training. Set an alarm on your phone twice a day to alert your to read 10 verses. Then after 3 days, change it to 4 times a day. Set the alarm for when you are not tired. Like 9am, noon, 4 pm, 7pm.

Set an alarm to self-harm yourself. Once per day at the end of the day when you are tired. Say 10 pm or when you go to bed. Start telling yourself you're too tired to do it. Too tired. Too late. Too anything you can think of.

Train yourself! Everything is training or lack of it!

Peace and Blessings

Well, I didn’t self harm last night. I held off all day and by bedtime, I was to exhausted lol!! I grabbed my pocket knife and thought about it but it was just to late. I couldn’t bring myself to do it that late at night. All I wanted to do was go to sleep!!!!!!!

Thanks you so much!!! I’m feeling victorious lol! As I’m writing this I know I won’t be self harming tonight. I’m already to tired to do it lol!
I just want my bed with my electric blanket !

Thank you! Thank you!!!!

God bless you!

 

[TPop]

Well, I didn’t self harm last night. I held off all day and by bedtime, I was to exhausted lol!! I grabbed my pocket knife and thought about it but it was just to late. I couldn’t bring myself to do it that late at night. All I wanted to do was go to sleep!!!!!!!

Thanks you so much!!! I’m feeling victorious lol! As I’m writing this I know I won’t be self harming tonight. I’m already to tired to do it lol!
I just want my bed with my electric blanket !

Thank you! Thank you!!!!

God bless you!

And that is one flower planted and a day behind you! Maybe it is the only flower. But that just makes it that much more starkly beautiful in contrast.

Now. Toss your harming knife on top of a cupboard. Not where you can't get it. But where you have to grab a chair to get to it. More effort is required than maybe you are interested in.

And if tonight does not bring success, so what! It rains and the waters recede again. And a new day is born.

Peace and Blessings

 

[Faith over Fear]

And that is one flower planted and a day behind you! Maybe it is the only flower. But that just makes it that much more starkly beautiful in contrast.

Now. Toss your harming knife on top of a cupboard. Not where you can't get it. But where you have to grab a chair to get to it. More effort is required than maybe you are interested in.

And if tonight does not bring success, so what! It rains and the waters recede again. And a new day is born.

Peace and Blessings

So far another day self harm FREE!!! After reading your post I went and put my knife in the top of my closet. I can’t reach it without getting a stool. I generally keep my knife in my pocket all day and on my nightstand at night. I feel funny without having it close. I keep reaching for it and it’s not there. I always take it out my pocket and fiddle with it. I feel in control of things with it close by. I know that sounds silly but I always felt like I had control of my situations and my emotions with it. Stupid!

Anyway thanks again!!! I’ve tried so many different things to try and stop this. I’ve tried everything from ice cubes to a tens massager to zap me out of it. This is the first thing that has worked. Anybody that knows me can tell you bedtime is serious business to me. I do not want to be messed with or doing anything past 9:00… I feel like you tailored that advice particularly for me… My mind is blown how perfect it was for me!!!!

Words can’t fully express my gratitude!!!
Thank you so very much!!! I’ve got hope that I may no longer be a slave to self harm! I admit I still desire to do it but I think I’m definitely on the better end of things.

God bless you!!!!!!!

 

[TPop]

So far another day self harm FREE!!! After reading your post I went and put my knife in the top of my closet. I can’t reach it without getting a stool. I generally keep my knife in my pocket all day and on my nightstand at night. I feel funny without having it close. I keep reaching for it and it’s not there. I always take it out my pocket and fiddle with it. I feel in control of things with it close by. I know that sounds silly but I always felt like I had control of my situations and my emotions with it. Stupid!

Anyway thanks again!!! I’ve tried so many different things to try and stop this. I’ve tried everything from ice cubes to a tens massager to zap me out of it. This is the first thing that has worked. Anybody that knows me can tell you bedtime is serious business to me. I do not want to be messed with or doing anything past 9:00… I feel like you tailored that advice particularly for me… My mind is blown how perfect it was for me!!!!

Words can’t fully express my gratitude!!!
Thank you so very much!!! I’ve got hope that I may no longer be a slave to self harm! I admit I still desire to do it but I think I’m definitely on the better end of things.

God bless you!!!!!!!

Praise the Lord. How amazing is He!

You know. My oldest sister, I remember her when she and her husband came back and lived with us for a while. She is 12 yrs older than I am. She put chapstick on every hour or two. And drank maybe 7 diet cokes a day. She was addicted to both. part of her training. She could not go without chapstick on her lips for a while.

She trained herself. Somewhere along the way she stopped that. And I imagine it was not easy for her to do. She always had a glass of coke with halfway-melted ice cubes in it. I know. Cause I would sip it. And she always had chapstick.

We all train ourselves and hate to untrain things.

From the little things to the big things. It is all training.
I need to train myself not to play a game on my computer and go workout instead. :\ I need to do this.

Leave the knife where it is. Do not make it part of you. You wear clothes every day. But they are not a 'part' of you. Somehow, that knife became 'part' of you, aligned with you and your mood, and responsible to something. End that. It is not a healthy coping mechanism. Replace it with doing One nice thing for strange each day. My oldest son is so good at stores and restaurants saying "God Bless" when he says thank you and leaves. Add that to your training. Say "God Bless" to employees and others you interact with when you leave a store. I do. It is a good feeling. Makes you look more outside and less in, as in what is good for others in places of thinking only of yourself.

Peace and Blessings

 

[Faith over Fear]

Praise the Lord. How amazing is He!

You know. My oldest sister, I remember her when she and her husband came back and lived with us for a while. She is 12 yrs older than I am. She put chapstick on every hour or two. And drank maybe 7 diet cokes a day. She was addicted to both. part of her training. She could not go without chapstick on her lips for a while.

She trained herself. Somewhere along the way she stopped that. And I imagine it was not easy for her to do. She always had a glass of coke with halfway-melted ice cubes in it. I know. Cause I would sip it. And she always had chapstick.

We all train ourselves and hate to untrain things.

From the little things to the big things. It is all training.
I need to train myself not to play a game on my computer and go workout instead. :\ I need to do this.

Leave the knife where it is. Do not make it part of you. You wear clothes every day. But they are not a 'part' of you. Somehow, that knife became 'part' of you, aligned with you and your mood, and responsible to something. End that. It is not a healthy coping mechanism. Replace it with doing One nice thing for strange each day. My oldest son is so good at stores and restaurants saying "God Bless" when he says thank you and leaves. Add that to your training. Say "God Bless" to employees and others you interact with when you leave a store. I do. It is a good feeling. Makes you look more outside and less in, as in what is good for others in places of thinking only of yourself.

Peace and Blessings

I’m barely 5 foot but right now I feel 10 foot tall lol!! I’m still self harm free! I can’t believe it’s finally over! I still have a desire to do it but holding off all day and waiting till bedtime works for me. I’m just too tired lol!

It is a weird feeling to be out in public without my pocket knife on me. I keep reaching for it and my heart drops thinking I lost it, then I remember it is safely put away.

I would cut myself to cope, feel secure and in control and as a result of that I felt like a freak. Now I’m feeling somewhat better about myself.

Regrettably I’ll forever have scars to remind me of this particular time in life. On the bright side I’ll always remember the victory God has given. It’s all part of my testimony and it’s under the blood!!!

Nonetheless I can’t wipe the smile off my face lol!!

Thank you so very very much!!!!!!