I am NOTHING here!

[aflower4God]

Hi there,

My family lately has been supporting me and my problems even through my mothers alcoholism that she is trying to quit for the 100th time. I have been feeling like my parents really do care about my well being and that feeling was AWESOME but let me tell ya their kindness was VERY short lived. I tried to explain to them how I feel like "half a woman" cause at my work the women ONLY like to talk about their significant other OR their kids and do not want to talk to me cause I have neither. I hate my life and wish so much to be dead...I have been praying for years to have cancer and die...I just think that I am truely in the way in this world, just ASK my parents, they dont give a crap about me!!!! I dont know how much begging I can do to God to let me be in heaven WHERE I BELONG I am NOTHING HERE!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[OceanAngel]

*hugs*

I've been where you are and have prayed to die.

I got it of it by seeing where I am and what I needed to change amongst other things.

if you wanna talk or just vent, my pm box is always open or add me to msn if you wanna


I pray that you get better.

 

[AllTalkNoAction]

You have blue eyes.

Good that you see through "the world", receive God's Spirit (Acts 2:4, 33, 39) and show them what they couldn't show you!

 

[AWorkInProgress]

Hi there,

My family lately has been supporting me and my problems even through my mothers alcoholism that she is trying to quit for the 100th time. I have been feeling like my parents really do care about my well being and that feeling was AWESOME but let me tell ya their kindness was VERY short lived. I tried to explain to them how I feel like "half a woman" cause at my work the women ONLY like to talk about their significant other OR their kids and do not want to talk to me cause I have neither. I hate my life and wish so much to be dead...I have been praying for years to have cancer and die...I just think that I am truely in the way in this world, just ASK my parents, they dont give a crap about me!!!! I dont know how much begging I can do to God to let me be in heaven WHERE I BELONG I am NOTHING HERE!!!!!!!!!!!

heya sis,

Back in February there was a discussion on "Nice guys do finish last". I read it and I got all flustered about it... but it was true. I could not lie that I did match up to the description.

God placed it in my heart that I stop thinking about a relationship and just spend the next 6 months developing. It was one of the hardest things I ever did and ultimately is was best thing I did. I turn the focus from "Why others do this?" to "Why do I do this?".

I have natural gift of analyzation and mercy so I pulled out on my own. For you I suggest set up set of appointments with a counsellor. I will tell you the MOST important part of growth is HUMILITY.

2 Chronicles 7:14
14 Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.

Two other things;

I am going to give you a heads up. You are lonely sister which is why the need for a relationship is hurting you on the inside so much.

Read this on loneliness.

Other is your goals in life. I was talking with my friend Aaron on goals in life. Going off of Opera's "First thing you want to be when you wake up in the morning" question. I said I want to be a good husband and father as my #1 goal in life.

Aaron told me that is a bit dysfunctional. He had a good point, because it is a goal that put's my success in someone else's hands. If I fail to find a mate, then I become desparate. Placing me in situation with a woman I do not love or is unhealthy for us to be together.

Told me that it is a good goal to achieve, but it should be the one that drives me when I wake up in the morning. Our passion in life should be that. Sometimes our passion in life is not easy to find, may take some searching and exploring.

I found my passion, gift of Mercy/empathy. What I do here on recovery boards. I am focused on getting a job in this passion. As well I like to play the guitar and maybe the violin. These things bring me joy in doing them and I don't have to put my happiness in someone else's hands while doing it.

Really meditate on my words sis. Your parents love you, but they need to solve their own problems as well. Don't be afraid to get some counselling going.

In His service,

AWIP

 

[TrueHope]

Hi sweetie! I have sooooo been where you are. Sometimes we must walk alone to be shown humility, to get closer to God, to learn to depend upon Him and only Him and not on anything of the world. Sometimes it is to give us time to die to our fleshy selves because all that surrounds us is selfish, fleshy, over exaggerating people.

Life is no bowl of yummy ice-cream, that is for sure. There is only one thing we can count on....and that is Him....especially when we know we can not count on ourselves.

I agree with aworkinprogress! Not fun, but sometimes quite necessary!!! You are in my prayers!!!!

 

[aflower4God]

Hi there everyone,

You all have helped shed some light on this matter that I am dealing with. I totally agree with you all and that is so right on that I may not be ment to "fit in" at work because God wants me to focus on Him. I dont mind so much being single BUT what I do hate is being "outcasted" cause I am single. Being single is a will of God. I can not help it that I am single, and really I dont think about it until someone shoves that singleness in my face by outcasting me and having no desire to talk to me. I mean being single does not make me a person, it really dosen't it is my heart that makes me who I am. People at work and in society seem to only focus on either one's status or ones looks. But true brothers and sisters in Christ do not act in that matter as well as some unbelievers too. I have met some unbelievers who do not care if I am single or that my face does not belong on a celeb mag. I know that I have worked well with those who act professional and could care less about my status or my looks just as long as I get the work done. That is all that should really matter at work. One should not outcast someone just because they are "different". If God thinks that I belong in this world then I must find a city where as people like me (hard honest worker) will fit it.
Thanks again friends!

God bless ya!