Hypocrites!

[lyoung704]

I'm in high school and today I was sitting with some of my "Christian" friends. I was shocked when they started talking about all the partying and drinking they were going to do this weekend. They also curse often and act...very unChristlike.

The word Christian has a meaning and they throw it around like it's nothing. If you're gonna talk the talk then walk the walk. I know I'm not perfect, but what kind of friend am I if I sit by and watch them destroy themselves.

I want to say something to them, but I never know how to talk to them without sounding judgmental or preachy .

But then again I know I can't afford not to talk to them.

What can I say? They think it's nothing wrong with having sex, drinking, smoking, drugs. How can I confront them in a Christian manner? If you want, you can email me at [email removed - please pm member for email].

 

[Sharky]

examine yourself too to see if you're in the faith. Sometimes we ourselves have be hypocritical without knowing it.

After you have examined (and fixed up your side) then you confront them. If they're casually cussin, lusting, drunk partying etc, then they're not christians. But false converts.

A christian bears the fruits peace, patience, love, kindness, gentleness, meekness, self control, repentance and good works.

Make sure you yourself bear those fruits, and bear them with patience. Then you talk with them even rebuke them.

give it a go.

 

[Shannonkish]

We are all hypocrites in one way or another.

 

[C.A.B.L]

I don't believe we are all hypocrites one way or another. Most people, if they are genuine Christians, don't realize that they sin sometimes. Usually when I see a fellow Christian doing something that is un-Christlike, I will usually quote the scripture that they are breaking. I think something that alot of us don't take very seriously is the verse in John 14 where Jesus himself says, "If you love me, keep my commands" -- if we truly love Jesus then we are going to WANT to act like He did. His love is the chief motivator for our obedience. I would just pray for them, but you can't MAKE them want to obey, it has to be something that they decide for themselves.

 

[C.A.B.L]

I forgot something, if they think it's ok to act in a certain way, read Revelation 21. In that chapter it talks about people who do those things, will not enter the Kingdom of God.

 

[2Timothy2]

I agree with what has been said so far. Go to the Scriptures and use them when you 'confront' your friends. They need to hear what God has put you there to tell them. 2 Tim. 3:16 All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for REPROOF, for CORRECTION, for instruction in righteousness. But, in my experience, some of them, or maybe all of them will not care what you have to say, and may ridicule you for saying it. But if you care for them, you will have to endure that. (2 Tim 2:3) Remember, when we suffer for obeying the Lord, He knows, and will both comfort us here, and reward us when we are with Him. It's hard, I know, but it truly is worth it. They may not listen right now, but perhaps 5 maybe 10 years from now, the Holy Spirit will use what you say now to convict them. Let God deal with the timing of their repentence, and you focus on doing what you know He wants you to do.

 

[JesusRox]

I know what you mean. I don't understand some people I know who call themselves Christian but don't act it at all. I think it really depends on the person and how to approach them. I know some of my friends would get mad and not talk to me, some woul be okay and understand where I'm coming from if I just simply said something straight up to them.

 

[Shannonkish]

Most people, if they are genuine Christians, don't realize that they sin sometimes.

I disagree.. If they are genuine Christians, then they should fell conviction for their sin... regardless of whether it was fully intentional or not. How are you going to not know that you sinned but be expected to be held accounatable for it?

That's like saying that a child that dies at the age of 2 who has stole a cookie from a friend is going to hell because the child sinned, even though the child is not old enough to comprehend what right and wrong is yet.

Like I said, we are all hypocrites in one way or another.. some obviously more than others.

 

[fieldmouse3]

I haven't run into any situations like this lately, but in the past, I've just let them amke their own choices. Talking to them didn't really do any good.

 

[Heinrich]

I think your friend(s) should get saved (or atleast come 2 repentance)!
So pray 2 God and ask him 2 open there eyes VERY WIDE

 

[e8514]

Lyoung,

It takes a lot to walk the Christian walk. The commitment is very diffcult. First, I want to say welcome to Gods family.

As for your friends--Many people find they have to choose new friends once they come to know the Lord. I would love them and keep them in your prayers. I feel the frst steps is to continue your walk with Christ and get stronger before you would confront someone.

We all sin and fall short of the glory of God. We will sin until we leave this earth. The important thing as everyone else has pointed out is these friends should be convicted of their sins if they were wanting to live the Chrisitian life.

Some feel when the become Chrisitians, we cannot sin. We will. Read in in the New Testament anout the parable of the mustard seed. When you give your heart to the Lord and make the commiment to him you are planting a seed. You will sin quite often as the seed grows.

Now when you become that strong oak tree you are getting very close to God and the Sin is very limited and if you do sin it is very pircing to the heart and soul. The Christian walk is very much a growth experience. I would advice against you going to your friends and pointing out their sins. God will deal with them. You might find you cannot be a part of things they do--Now you will set yourself apart--a friend or two might follow to better themselfs.

Hang in there--it is a growth process. I not saying you will not have the opporrtunity in time to point out to a fellow Christian what scripture they are braeking--At your stage it could be discouraging if they totally ignore you after you confront them.

Pray for them and God will do the rest.

God Bless

 

[Shannonkish]

just subscribing to this thread.

 

[caitlincares]

just subscribing to this thread.

You do not need to post in a thread to subscribe to it.
You only need to go to "thread tools" and click on "subscribe to thread".

 

[Im_A]

I'm in high school and today I was sitting with some of my "Christian" friends. I was shocked when they started talking about all the partying and drinking they were going to do this weekend. They also curse often and act...very unChristlike.

The word Christian has a meaning and they throw it around like it's nothing. If you're gonna talk the talk then walk the walk. I know I'm not perfect, but what kind of friend am I if I sit by and watch them destroy themselves.

I want to say something to them, but I never know how to talk to them without sounding judgmental or preachy .

But then again I know I can't afford not to talk to them.

What can I say? They think it's nothing wrong with having sex, drinking, smoking, drugs. How can I confront them in a Christian manner? If you want, you can email me at [email removed - please pm member for email].

all i can say is, live your faith in fear and trembling, and pray and be there for the believers that need help. too many times it is easy to say that certain people are hypocrites because their sin is acknowledgable to the eye and we forget the sins we deal with.

yes you should hold them accountable, but dont' forget to love these people as you love yourself. if you dont' like people preaching at you, then dont' preach to them. and dont' jump to conclusions about their own faith.

with the drinking and stuff, you'll find a difference between drunkeness and actual drinking. with the smoking, if one believes that smoking cigarettes is bad because it hurts the temple, then be sure to not eat any fast food, or drink any pop or eat anything unhealthy. we have to remember that when go to hold somoene accountable, we dont' be a hypocrite ourselves.

the best advise i can give is to just pray for them and talk to them as your friend. when i went to college, i saw this best played out in one of my missed friends.

a friend of mine that i met at a coffee shop because he was playing music there that night and he was playing Larry Norman and it caught my ears big time, because Larry Norman is awesome. i was smoking a cigarette and having coffee while i was writing. we became friends. at that time in my life i was doing pot anytime i could find it and i've been a Christian since i was 12. i was really struggling in my life and i found one Christian who cared more about my faith then my specific struggles because if you fix your faith, the struggles will be fixed to some degree. i'll never forget his offer that i could over to the "brothers house" and have Bible Study with them, and to feel free to talk about how blitzed i got the other night and how much i need help with it. i never took him up on it, but at times i wish i would have. cause i was doing pot a lot, drinking anytime i could and a chain smoker and a sailor talker at that.

now, i've been clean off of drugs for about 4 years now, and drinking, i've finally got a grasp on it to where i don't have to get drunk anymore, and i can control a freedom we have when we reach 21. i still smoke cigarettes, and my language can be rough at times, but i'm a work in progress. just because someone struggles with sins that are evident to the eye, that doesn't mean they are hypocrite. that just means they are just like you, me and every other Christian. their weak, and they struggle with different things. so be there for them. talk to them, pray with them, pray by yourself for them. that doesn't mean you have to be around them while they are sinning, but if they need your help, don't pass it up. friends stick through the hardest of times. 1 Corinthians chapter 13 talks about true love. remember your struggles, and remember sin is sin, so whatever sin they struggle with, remember you have no right to come down on them, because you struggle with sin yourself. but you can be gracious and loving by standing on the Truth. and remember what Christ was to people. there is only one time we can see that Christ got upset at people and that was at when people turned the House of God into a place of theives. every other time, we see Christ being loving and graciously giving the truth, and it was only to the Religious Establishment of the day that we see Him really getting at them. so be Christ-like, love them as you would love yourself, pray, and don't interfere in the way God is reaching them, because nine times out of ten, you'll just be doing what you think is right, instead of what is right for them. God knows them better you do, so let God work in them and pray for them. dont' force the issue on them because what is the use if someone's heart is hard. all your doing is putting the truths of God up for slander, and why do that? (goes back to not giving our pearls to swine.) but show them love and talk to them. being loving and gracious, doesn't mean you have to condone sin

 

[feo]

That was actually one of the main things that held me back from Christianity... I would say to myself "pshaw look at all those hypocrates" ...

... it wasnt until AFTER I became a Christian that I realized the truth- hypocracy is HUMAN NATURE. I don't care what creed; its our tendancy to do what we don't say...

Thank the Lord Christ can heal me of such things

 

[TheOriginalWhitehorse]

You're right to be concerned. These are serious problems, and it's certainly not showing evidence of the Holy Spirit for them to be acting this way. It's one thing for one of them to have a besetting sin that s/he struggles with and is working hard to forsake, but it's another thing entirely for them to be gathering together as a group for the purpose of treating sins that cost Jesus the most agonizing death possible, as if it were so slight a gift. This is a very serious matter.

I would very gently and respectfully talk to them one-on-one, but if you receive backlash, you'll know which people are looking to grow in Christ and which ones are causing you to cast pearls. I'd deal with them very graciously, though, because if they've never been taught better, it may just be a matter of educating them. If they persist, I'd find a new group of friends entirely. It's not uncommon for people think it's possible to receive grace because of what church their parents attend. But the Bible says if we persist in sin, we no longer have any sacrifice left for sins. This is an incredibly serious warning. We're not allowed to sin flagrantly and expect to continue in it, thinking God will forgive us. We must fully intend to forsake sin, even though we struggle in the process and make many mistakes along the way. Your friends need to repent. But only you can decide whether this is a situation in which to be salt and light, or whether you'd be casting your pearls. I'll pray the Lord guides you.

 

[whatseekye]

Just wanted to add on the comment regarding confrontation. If you are going to confront them, you should pray *first*. Ask God to help you to help your friends.

 

[whatseekye]

Larry Norman is awesome.

Larry Norman is great. He's having some health problems these days, sad to say. He has a neat Web site where you can get updates on him. He needs prayer big time. http://www.larrynorman.com

 

[Endure2]

we all need to live holy, and we have a responsibility to our people.
we just need to keep in mind that God changes the heart, we cant.
prayer and the power of the spirit help people, not us.
God may use us to speak to them, but its God whos doing the work.
our words to them are the less important thing.

and not all cussing, drinking etc, is hypocricy... sometimes its just they are young in the Lord and need to grow, but they dont need to be rebuked, they need to be allowed to be covered in grace and grow in time, like we do.
you rebuke someone who truely transgressing what they know better.

you always pray for them out of love before you correct them or go to them.
its good to just say "hey... dont you feel like this is wrong?" in a kind way.
but you dont "correct them" untill youve prayed for them out of love.

becuase if you dont truely love and care for someone, you dont have the right to correct them.
God earned the right to rule over us and correct us, by dying for us.

and no matter what...
NO MATTER WHAT.

1. YOU ALWAYS WALK IN LOVE!
2. YOU NEVER SPEAK EVIL OF ANY MAN!
3. YOU NEVER SIT IN THE SEAT OF THE SCORNFUL!
no matter how right you are.

sometimes its better to be kind, than to be right.
becuase kindness can open the door to speak, you correctness wont always.

we all have flaws, and God is working on us, and sometimes other people are just still in the process, the same as us.