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Husband Doesn't Talk
- Thread starter Katie's Mom
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- Nov 16, 2016
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I am so sorry for your loss.
About your marriage and these issues, is there anything he will talk to you about? Even something explanatory or "boring". I ask because sometimes soliciting that and sitting through it can help to get the talking going. Although it sounds like the problem you're describing is pretty major and won't exactly go away with one little fix.
Have you been able to tell him about this? Or tell anyone else about it?
About your marriage and these issues, is there anything he will talk to you about? Even something explanatory or "boring". I ask because sometimes soliciting that and sitting through it can help to get the talking going. Although it sounds like the problem you're describing is pretty major and won't exactly go away with one little fix.
Have you been able to tell him about this? Or tell anyone else about it?
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Does he *never* talk to you?
Assuming, you guys do talk at least occasionally: What are the topics that he is willing or even enjoying to talk about?
About what things in particular would you like to talk with him?
When he talks ("chats") with his friends - what do they talk about? Is that the kind of talk/chat you are longing to have with him?
You say you "find connection through talk". Do you find connection through talk no matter what the talk is about, or are there certain requirements for talk in order to have this connecting effect, for you?
Assuming, you guys do talk at least occasionally: What are the topics that he is willing or even enjoying to talk about?
About what things in particular would you like to talk with him?
When he talks ("chats") with his friends - what do they talk about? Is that the kind of talk/chat you are longing to have with him?
You say you "find connection through talk". Do you find connection through talk no matter what the talk is about, or are there certain requirements for talk in order to have this connecting effect, for you?
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victorinus
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S.O.J.I.A.
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- Nov 6, 2016
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there's the possibility that your husband may have ASD(autistic spectrum disorder) or more specifically AS(Asperger's syndrome).
If you haven't looked into this already you should to see if he fits the symptoms. having a grasp on what the issue is will allow you to get the help for him he needs.
If you haven't looked into this already you should to see if he fits the symptoms. having a grasp on what the issue is will allow you to get the help for him he needs.
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- Jun 18, 2014
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W - this is the marrieds forum; and singles are not supposed to post here.
That said, I quoted your post because it is an interesting possibility.
I have a granddaughter that is somewhere on the spectrum. She is similar to Aspie's but not quite. In studying it out, her mom (my middle daughter) recognized some of the symptoms in me. So she gave me a book 2 years ago "Look Me in the Eye" by John Elder Robison.
Some of it did sound eerily familiar. I would suggest reading it. Even if the OP's husband is NOT an Aspie or on the spectrum, it is an informative read.
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- Jun 22, 2007
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I'm unsure of the reason why you deleted your post Katie's Mom....but I wanted to let you know that this is a common problem that's destroying a lot of marriages (and it comes from the cultural ways we define "masculinity"....and it's toxic).
If you're interested---this is a TED talk on the subject:
As for a solution? Maybe if your husband would be interested in participating in a Retrouvaille weekend? Here's the information on that: Marriage Help Program For Couples
Oh....another thing I just remembered: you may find these videos validating....this guy was much like your husband, and worked to be more relational (do you think your husband would watch some of the videos with you?):
If you're interested---this is a TED talk on the subject:
As for a solution? Maybe if your husband would be interested in participating in a Retrouvaille weekend? Here's the information on that: Marriage Help Program For Couples
Oh....another thing I just remembered: you may find these videos validating....this guy was much like your husband, and worked to be more relational (do you think your husband would watch some of the videos with you?):
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