hummm....

[Sign Of The Fish Burger]

I was in my best friends wedding this past Friday night.... I am so happy for her, and it was such an honor to be a part of her special day, however, I am more depressed about being single then ever....

The whole day I felt as tho Iw as holding back the tears, just I just wanted to badly to be her. The perfect wedding, the perfect man that God had chosen for her... it was perfect... adn so excited to see them start a life together..... And now they are on a beautiful honeymoon together.

I guess I was filled with alot of bitterness before, but now since the wedding I am really jealous and even more bitter. I find myself only listening to sad depressing music... and I just feel yucky....

I really hate thinking abd being this way. I dont wan tto be jealous and bitter anymore. And I am so sick of people telling me in Gods timing I will find someone, not to think about it, or not to worry about it... its so easily said then done for me. I donbt know why I struggle with this so much.... I realyl hate it. I dont know what to do for the mean time... while I am waiting for Gods timing.... I keep busy at church and with my friends... and reading my bible... school work... I am a very busy person... but thru it all... its always on my mind... I pray and pray and pray and I seem to get nowhers.... Is God ignoring me??

Sorry about venting

 

[msjones21]

I know how you feel. I was 18 when I got married to the wrong guy. He ended up abusing me and cheated on me towards the end. We divorced right before I turned 20. Since then I've had one serious relationship and countless one-date-wonders. None of these relationships were Christ-centered. It took me almost three years of trying to fill my times of lonliness with men to realize it brings more heartache and hassle than being single.

I know that it's hard to hear "God will send the right man to you" when you're crying inside "when? When?" I ask myself that all the time. I think to myself "I thought I had it once already. How will I know when it's the right time?" The only comfort comes in knowing that God has plans for me bigger than I can imagine. For me going to weddings was only difficult right after my divorce. The first wedding I attended after we split up was the wedding of our friends from the college & career Sunday school class. When the Bridal March started I burst into tears.

Trust me, I know how you feel. Just keep using this time to prepare yourself for the man God has for you.

 

[Hewitt]

You are a really busy person, maybe you should just be still and listen. It certainly can't hurt to let God know how you're feeling and then take a few minutes to just sit and listen. It's worth a shot at least.

 

[msjones21]

Hey Sign, I just finished reading Single and Loving It. It was a wonderful book about being content with your singleness. Something I might mention that she wrote in her book. It's okay to feel those pangs of jealousy when a friend is getting married to God's perfect one for her. Jealousy, in and of itself, isn't sinful. It's when we meditate on that jealousy and allow it to fester and we start to act on that jealousy that it becomes a sin. The author of the book also said that if you have a desire to be married don't fret thinking God will call you to stay single forever because if that were the case, you would have no desire to wed. God gives us the desires of our hearts, just in His perfect timing. God will not allow anything to prevent you crossing paths with His chosen mate for you. Just consider this a "season" of singleness. It won't last forever. Just like the four seasons of the weather they don't last forever. We do the best we can to make them as pleasant as possible knowing that the next one will be coming soon. It's only a season. Make the most of it.

 

[Sign Of The Fish Burger]

Hey Sign, I just finished reading Single and Loving It. It was a wonderful book about being content with your singleness. Something I might mention that she wrote in her book. It's okay to feel those pangs of jealousy when a friend is getting married to God's perfect one for her. Jealousy, in and of itself, isn't sinful. It's when we meditate on that jealousy and allow it to fester and we start to act on that jealousy that it becomes a sin. The author of the book also said that if you have a desire to be married don't fret thinking God will call you to stay single forever because if that were the case, you would have no desire to wed. God gives us the desires of our hearts, just in His perfect timing. God will not allow anything to prevent you crossing paths with His chosen mate for you. Just consider this a "season" of singleness. It won't last forever. Just like the four seasons of the weather they don't last forever. We do the best we can to make them as pleasant as possible knowing that the next one will be coming soon. It's only a season. Make the most of it.

thansk hun... I especially needed that tonight... I think I am goign to check out that book...

 

[hamster_head]

If you really are in a place to think about serious dating to go towards marriage, go out and do what you can to get there. Talk to God, study the bible, and talk to others to create a list of all the things you feel a man needs to be a husband. The more knowledge you gain about love and marriage, the better chance you'll know how to find it, and be prepared when you do. Then begin to actively search for that man...try to get involved in college-aged christian groups, maybe even join a few of the Christian dating services on the net. If you see a guy who might show promise, don't feel shy to ask him on a date and get to know him better. God will help you of course, but many times God's help envolve other actions than just praying and waiting.

Now...don't get me wrong...certainly no offense meant if you're already doing things such as this. If that's the case, then maybe you can find comfort in the fact that many others feel your same frusterations.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

You know, if you're too focused on marriage, you might not be focused enough on God.

 

[Living4Him03]

When I was 19 one of my best friends got married. It was such a wonderful ceremony and they were so in love...I really felt like God had forgotten me or would forget me! But, now, that couple is divorced...marriage isn't as fairy tale as it seems. The wedding is just a happy crumb of a lifetime of happiness, struggles, heartache, crying, and laughing. I used to imagine being a bride and what it will feel like to walk down the isle and see my future husband waiting for me ...I'm sure it will be wonderful, but you know what's even better to imagine? Being the bride of Christ! To see His face and be able to know you are a Child of God when Christ comes back! That is really exciting! It took me awhile to get to this point, but it happened, and you will get there too. God bless ya, sweetie.

 

[Echoes Peak]

When I was 19 one of my best friends got married. It was such a wonderful ceremony and they were so in love...I really felt like God had forgotten me or would forget me! But, now, that couple is divorced...marriage isn't as fairy tale as it seems. The wedding is just a happy crumb of a lifetime of happiness, struggles, heartache, crying, and laughing. I used to imagine being a bride and what it will feel like to walk down the isle and see my future husband waiting for me ...I'm sure it will be wonderful, but you know what's even better to imagine? Being the bride of Christ! To see His face and be able to know you are a Child of God when Christ comes back! That is really exciting! It took me awhile to get to this point, but it happened, and you will get there too. God bless ya, sweetie.

Right on I think sometimes, as women (because I am not sure if men do this as well), we get hung up on the wedding day. And it really is easy to do, with the whole ceremony, dress, cake, flowers, family thing-its like the biggest stark reminder if you're single, that you ain't got that. But from what I've understood from my sister and other people, it's actually hard work. People don't talk about the days, they and their spouse have a disagreement, or the hassle of chores and screaming kids, or the effort to make sure there is good communication in the family.There's alot that goes into it and you want be to sure that when it is time for you, through God's assistance, you will be adequately prepared for it. It took me awhile to realize this after being in a long strings of weddings for other people . The funny thing is, you'll probably find the man for you when you are truly not looking for him.

 

[mina]

i know how you feel, all my girl friends from high school and college are married and engaged. One or two even told me they couldn't be friends with me anymore because i wasn't like them. Several have even made fun of me and laughed behind my back because I'm the only single one. Real nice, huh? It hurt me inexplicitly when I found out. I lost trust in Christians for a long long time. I hid from people for a long long time. What i have learned from this is this: It's in God's perfect timing. Don't look to others and compare your life. Don't listen to what people or the world may say about you. God has engraved you on the palms of His hands. He will NEVER forget about you. I'm 24. I look back at the time I was single in High school and college and i'm so very thankful that God protected me from guys. The boys i liked are not what i would want now. It's hard. I still want a relationship. I still want to be special to someone. I still deeply desire a family of my own. But unless it's from God it's going to be severly screwed up. Just handle it one day at a time. God loves you and He knows everything about you, and He knows all of your tommorrows. I hope i dont sound preachy. I needed to remind myself as well. I struggle with this daily it seems.

 

[mamaneenie]

i know how you feel, all my girl friends from high school and college are married and engaged. One or two even told me they couldn't be friends with me anymore because i wasn't like them. Several have even made fun of me and laughed behind my back because I'm the only single one. Real nice, huh?

What sort of "friends" do that. That's terrible.

 

[mamaneenie]

Right on I think sometimes, as women (because I am not sure if men do this as well), we get hung up on the wedding day. And it really is easy to do, with the whole ceremony, dress, cake, flowers, family thing-its like the biggest stark reminder if you're single, that you ain't got that. But from what I've understood from my sister and other people, it's actually hard work. People don't talk about the days, they and their spouse have a disagreement, or the hassle of chores and screaming kids, or the effort to make sure there is good communication in the family.There's alot that goes into it and you want be to sure that when it is time for you, through God's assistance, you will be adequately prepared for it. It took me awhile to realize this after being in a long strings of weddings for other people . The funny thing is, you'll probably find the man for you when you are truly not looking for him.

Absolutely 100% correct. It is hard work to keep a marriage. I found my husband when I had given up looking.

 

[mina]

What sort of "friends" do that. That's terrible.

exactly, that's why I have no friends now.

 

[Sign Of The Fish Burger]

I still cant help but feel depressed... I WANT to stop looking and thinking and worrying about this stuff.... I really really do... I would be so much easier on me. And I do pray about it... I hate having all these stupid desires... even the desire to move away... I cant escape all this... And it sucks I just wish God would take it all away

 

[hamster_head]

I still cant help but feel depressed... I WANT to stop looking and thinking and worrying about this stuff.... I really really do... I would be so much easier on me. And I do pray about it... I hate having all these stupid desires... even the desire to move away... I cant escape all this... And it sucks I just wish God would take it all away

Here! *Hands Sign of Fish a Cookie*! Cookies make everything better!

Hmm...encouraging eating with emotions is probably bad...oh well! *Hands cookies to everyone*

 

[Echoes Peak]

Here! *Hands Sign of Fish a Cookie*! Cookies make everything better!

Hmm...encouraging eating with emotions is probably bad...oh well! *Hands cookies to everyone*

So does apple pie.

Really..You'll be okay. You will get to a point in your life..when you will be doing so much that you won't even realize this momentary sadness. Don't get so focused on this that if you do meet a guy, that you might assume he's the "one" because you want him to be. Chill, pray, hang out with friends, read good books, volunteer, paint, sing songs, learn an instrument, and thank God for your husband who's coming around the corner.

 

[Sign Of The Fish Burger]

So does apple pie.

Really..You'll be okay. You will get to a point in your life..when you will be doing so much that you won't even realize this momentary sadness. Don't get so focused on this that if you do meet a guy, that you might assume he's the "one" because you want him to be. Chill, pray, hang out with friends, read good books, volunteer, paint, sing songs, learn an instrument, and thank God for your husband who's coming around the corner.

aww thanks! that makes me feel a bit better

 

[Echoes Peak]

aww thanks! that makes me feel a bit better

See, I knew I had a purpose.

Yer welcome.