How worldly is too worldly?

[LovebirdsFlying]

I don't mean to sound like I just keep harping. Sometimes I have trouble directly asking a question, and when my circular way of asking doesn't get answered, I finally figure out that I'm not being plain enough. So now I'm trying to be point-blank.

I have pierced ears. Two holes in each lobe, but nothing on the upper ear, nose, tongue, eyebrow, or anywhere else. I added the second set of holes when I was in high school, but in recent years I tend to wear only one pair of earrings, gold tone or an imitation gem such as a diamond or pearl. Studs, small hoops, or delicate pendants, but nothing overly big and cumbersome. I personally don't like earrings that are as big as the ears themselves are. I have similar taste with other jewelry. I like my necklaces to be subtle, not overpowering. I tend not to wear bracelets, and on my hands I wear only my engagement ring. After our wedding, I'll add the wedding ring too. I wear makeup because I like the artistic expression of it, and I don't like it overdone. For nail polish, I stick to a pinkish beige, but my nails look shoddy if I go without it completely.

It seems the only ones who would say that my style is too worldly, are those who would ban women from wearing makeup and jewelry altogether. But for those who say I'm within acceptable parameters, where would you draw the line? More than two holes in a lobe? Piercings other than earlobe?

I've been wondering about the placement of that line, modesty in dress and such, and I've come to this conclusion: If all heads turn whenever you enter the room, for whatever reason, then your look is too extreme and should be curtailed. But--I think this applies either way. I am beginning to think that one should not dress in a way that calls attention to him/herself, whether it is by being too worldly or too "holy," for want of a better way to phrase it. I'm referring to such as an Amish or Mennonite style of dress, or a nun in full habit; it stands out in public. I'm thinking that this too is calling attention to yourself and should be avoided if possible. What do others think?

 

[holyrokker]

I've been wondering about the placement of that line, modesty in dress and such, and I've come to this conclusion: If all heads turn whenever you enter the room, for whatever reason, then your look is too extreme and should be curtailed. But--I think this applies either way. I am beginning to think that one should not dress in a way that calls attention to him/herself, whether it is by being too worldly or too "holy," for want of a better way to phrase it. I'm referring to such as an Amish or Mennonite style of dress, or a nun in full habit; it stands out in public. I'm thinking that this too is calling attention to yourself and should be avoided if possible. What do others think?

I agree with what you said here. Fashion is a cultural issue. What one culture considers "normal" another might find "strange". I think you are right that the Biblical standard is to avoid drawing attention to self.

If a man were to walk into a typical American church wearing a long robe and sandals, every head would turn because that is not typical for American "Christian" culture. 2,000 years ago it would've been acceptable.

There are cultures where a man wearing a suit and tie would also turn heads because it would be inappropriate.

 

[tosety]

My stand is that it must first be a personal decision based on God's working on your heart, but there are places where God may be calling you to GENTLY talk to another believer about their choices.

if they are being self destructive in their choices, the loving thing is to bring it up to them after lots of prayer

if they are causing another to stumble, pray about it then carefully tell them about it

if it hurts no one, keep your mouth shut and pray for both them and you


what say you to this advice?

 

[tosety]

I've been wondering about the placement of that line, modesty in dress and such, and I've come to this conclusion: If all heads turn whenever you enter the room, for whatever reason, then your look is too extreme and should be curtailed.

as a man, I find women who wear tight shirts and short skirts/shorts to be distracting. This is a real temptation for men, it is tough for a guy to keep from looking at a woman's body, so my advice would be to watch out from that angle

as to jewelry, just watch out for gaudiness:keep it simple and elegant, but jewelry is amoral in my opinion, so my advice would be to think about how people will prejudge you and decide if you're ok with that

 

[arunma]

I don't mean to sound like I just keep harping. Sometimes I have trouble directly asking a question, and when my circular way of asking doesn't get answered, I finally figure out that I'm not being plain enough. So now I'm trying to be point-blank.

I have pierced ears. Two holes in each lobe, but nothing on the upper ear, nose, tongue, eyebrow, or anywhere else. I added the second set of holes when I was in high school, but in recent years I tend to wear only one pair of earrings, gold tone or an imitation gem such as a diamond or pearl. Studs, small hoops, or delicate pendants, but nothing overly big and cumbersome. I personally don't like earrings that are as big as the ears themselves are. I have similar taste with other jewelry. I like my necklaces to be subtle, not overpowering. I tend not to wear bracelets, and on my hands I wear only my engagement ring. After our wedding, I'll add the wedding ring too. I wear makeup because I like the artistic expression of it, and I don't like it overdone. For nail polish, I stick to a pinkish beige, but my nails look shoddy if I go without it completely.

It seems the only ones who would say that my style is too worldly, are those who would ban women from wearing makeup and jewelry altogether. But for those who say I'm within acceptable parameters, where would you draw the line? More than two holes in a lobe? Piercings other than earlobe?

I've been wondering about the placement of that line, modesty in dress and such, and I've come to this conclusion: If all heads turn whenever you enter the room, for whatever reason, then your look is too extreme and should be curtailed. But--I think this applies either way. I am beginning to think that one should not dress in a way that calls attention to him/herself, whether it is by being too worldly or too "holy," for want of a better way to phrase it. I'm referring to such as an Amish or Mennonite style of dress, or a nun in full habit; it stands out in public. I'm thinking that this too is calling attention to yourself and should be avoided if possible. What do others think?

Hi Lovebirds. In regards to your question about personal holiness, I feel you may be asking the wrong questions here. God is, after all, not concerned with outward appearances, but with the heart. As it says,

But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on [Eliab's] appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7)
​

Also consider this,

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. (1 Corinthians 10:31)
​

Instead of setting rules for ourselves, we should act with our hearts set on glorifying God, so that our actions will flow from this desire. Breaking of "rules" is usually a symptom of a heart problem, and not the problem itself. The problem with setting rules for ourselves is that each person has a different standard. You may believe that ear piercings are acceptabe, but not eyebrow piercings. The next Christian might believe that women should only have one piercing in each earlobe. Another might think that piercings of any kind are wrong. Where does it end? Are we really to believe that piercings are the means by which God identifies his people? It would be no less absurd to believe that one can gain God's favor through circumcision. At my old church back in college, there were girls who dressed goth and had more piercings than I could count. I felt no apprehension about worshiping the Lord right beside them, and never did I think that they were less sincere in their devotion to Christ Jesus than me. On the other hand I know people who dress normally and have no piercings of any kind, and who walk as enemies of the cross because they deny Jesus Christ.

My best judgment is that God is ultimately concerned about our heart. It says,

It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble. The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who has no reason to pass judgment on himself for what he approves. But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin. (Romans 14:21-23)
​

Therefore, if something does not go against your conscience and is not explicitly condemned in Scripture, I would be extremely hesitant to call it sinful. The Bible nowhere says "you shall not pierce your earlobe more than two times," so I think it would be ultimately futile to say that earlobe piercings, or any other kinds of piercings, is sinful. I think it's better for us to set our minds to worship Jesus Christ with our whole hearts and center our lives around him.

 

[PrincetonGuy]

If we are doing anything, anything at all, for a purpose other than furthering the kingdom of God, what we are doing is too worldly. God is not blind, and He sees the whole man and the whole woman and all that we do and why we do it—and He is concerned about all of it because all of it is important.

Let us not forget that what we are on the outside is a reflection of who we are on the inside. Living the Christian life is not a matter of asking what we can get away with; living the Christian life is denying oneself in full surrender to God and His will for our life.

 

[eldermike]

I think John the baptist started all this rebellion, he refused to dress in robes, actually wore camel hair and leather. He refused the normal covered dish baptist food, and went for bugs covered with honey. However Jesus said some nice things about him, go figure............

 

[holyrokker]

I think John the baptist started all this rebellion, he refused to dress in robes, actually wore camel hair and leather. He refused the normal covered dish baptist food, and went for bugs covered with honey. However Jesus said some nice things about him, go figure............

OK - How could John the Baptist be a Baptist if he didn't partake in potlucks?

 

[LovebirdsFlying]

I'm glad for the responses so far. Having been raised in a family with individuals that were either too legalistic, or Christian in name only but not in attitudes or actions, I am thoroughly confused.

I saw someone mention "what we can get away with." That's not what I'm after. I'm not worried about what I can get away with. I want to know what pleases God, and what is or isn't actually discussed in the Bible.

†

 

[eldermike]

OK - How could John the Baptist be a Baptist if he didn't partake in potlucks?

He was a BINO, (baptist in name only). There's a bunch of those around today

 

[tosety]

I saw someone mention "what we can get away with." That's not what I'm after. I'm not worried about what I can get away with. I want to know what pleases God, and what is or isn't actually discussed in the Bible.

Arunma had a good point that is worth repeating: God is first and foremost concerned with your heart attitude

as to what is discussed in the Bible, the specifics were for another culture, so as you're studying your Bible, ask God to show you the principles He wants you to follow, and ask mature christians about their convictions on the matter

most importantly, do not believe that God's acceptance of you has anything to do with how you dress, but be concerned about whether your liberty is a stumbling block to your neighbor

 

[FictionalHero]

LoveBirdsFlying,

As to the question of worldliness - I think it goes to the heart. Do you wear your makeup and jewelry for you, or to please others? The same goes for your daily walk with God, as well as the time you spend in prayer.

Do you pray because your supposed to, or because you want to? The question of being too worldly is not one that can be answered by asking anyone else, but by asking yourself - because everyone else is going to give you an opinion.

Does that mean you should get your nose pierced in each nostril, shave your head and get tattoos on each cheek? Not necessarily, because after a while you could be guilty of trying to attract attention to your appearance - which could detract from someones attention they are giving God.

It's all about choices/sacrifice and free will; gotta love it when no one has a complete answer, eh?

In love,
Eric

 

[LovebirdsFlying]

I appreciate the feedback. Just wanted to make note of that. I am reading each answer. And thank you.

(LOL @ JtB and potluck.....)