How to win against:Sexual immortality

[Ken-1122]

Topic is Sexual immortality

Question is:How does one refrain and conquer sexual immortality?
Hello everyone so I have been struggling with lust and sexual immortality,I have had sex with my girlfriend before marriage and I want to know if there is a solution and what do I need to do to not fall into lust and sin.Also I feel guilty and sad even though I know God forgives me .
Thank you for any answers!

Does God forgive you without consequence? If so, why the need to stop?

 

[2PhiloVoid]

Does God forgive you without consequence? If so, why the need to stop?

God forgives. But being a Christian and still sinning can have consequences of various sorts, some short term, some long term.

So, I think we should suggest to him that he go ahead and get married if he wants to continue engaging with this girlfriend. It'd be the responsible thing for us to do. Surely, as an ex-Christian, you can appreciate some of what I'm saying.

 

[Ken-1122]

God forgives. But being a Christian and still sinning can have consequences of various sorts, some short term, some long term.

So, I think we should suggest to him that he go ahead and get married if he wants to continue engaging with this girlfriend. It'd be the responsible thing for us to do. Surely, as an ex-Christian, you can appreciate some of what I'm saying.

I would never suggest anybody gets married simply because they wanna have sex.

 

[2PhiloVoid]

I would never suggest anybody gets married simply because they wanna have sex.

Why not?

 

[Ken-1122]

Why not?

I think it would be horrible for a guy to marry a girl he doesn't love because he wants sex, then (heaven forbid) he gets her pregnant, now a kid is involved; so he has a wife he doesn't love, a kid he doesn't want, and obligations he is not prepared for; and all he wanted was sex. to ruin not only his life but his wife and kid's lives this way is something I'm sure even you would hate to see happen........right???

 

[Whyayeman]

I think we could spare a moment to consider the partner here. Maybe she wanted to have sex with Belive but not to form a lasting relationship. So he could propose, but there is nothing in his post to give him much hope for a 'yes'.

Women are agents too, we men should remind ourselves.

 

[inkaboutit]

You might consider asking a moderator to move this to a Christians Only sub-forum.

Not all Christians agree. The dictionary has the wrong dictionary definition for the word fornication. It says that it is “single sex “out side of marriage. But if anyone research the 39 verses that use the word fornication they discover that it does not mean “single sex” but instead it means ,“joining in with the pagan worship sex orgy worshipping a fertility pagan god of the Bible days.” And not single sex at all.

New book ,“Discover Hidden Bible Sexual Freedom Book 1” on amazon ,clearly points this out and list all 39 Bible verses in the book to show all that it does not mean single sex at all.

 

[Whyayeman]

Not all Christians agree. The dictionary has the wrong dictionary definition for the word fornication. It says that it is “single sex “out side of marriage. But if anyone research the 39 verses that use the word fornication they discover that it does not mean “single sex” but instead it means ,“joining in with the pagan worship sex orgy worshipping a fertility pagan god of the Bible days.” And not single sex at all.

New book ,“Discover Hidden Bible Sexual Freedom Book 1” on amazon ,clearly points this out and list all 39 Bible verses in the book to show all that it does not mean single sex at all.

Which dictionary is that? Mine certainly doesn't. (The root of the word is Latin: fornix, meaning brothel.)

The word has no real connection with worship of pagan gods. Somebody just made that up.

 

[inkaboutit]

Which dictionary is that? Mine certainly doesn't. (The root of the word is Latin: fornix, meaning brothel.)

The word has no real connection with worship of pagan gods. Somebody just made that up.

The opposite is true.I has not connection with single sex. All 39 verses deals with worship a pagan fertility god. Not single sex. Dictionary is totally wrong . The Bible is truth, not the man made dictionary.

 

[inkaboutit]

The opposite is true.I has not connection with single sex. All 39 verses deals with worship a pagan fertility god. Not single sex. Dictionary is totally wrong . The Bible is truth, not the man made dictionary.

 

[Zoii]

Sex isn't immoral if its consensual.

 

[Whyayeman]

Dictionary is totally wrong . The Bible is truth, not the man made dictionary.

That is rubbish. (Try looking that up in the Bible!)

 

[CoreyD]

Topic is Sexual immortality

Question is:How does one refrain and conquer sexual immortality?
Hello everyone so I have been struggling with lust and sexual immortality,I have had sex with my girlfriend before marriage and I want to know if there is a solution and what do I need to do to not fall into lust and sin.Also I feel guilty and sad even though I know God forgives me .
Thank you for any answers!

It's good that you feel remorse over your sin.
The Bible tells us, that opens the way for forgiveness.

Conquering sexual immortality is not easy, especially if you are young.
Paul said, at 1 Corinthians 7:36, if a man is behaving improperly sexually, and he and the other, are past youth, they should marry.
In other words, it is better to marry than behave improperly to her, or yourself (1 Corinthians 6:18).

If a person goes so far as to commit immorality, they should not have a problem marrying that person, at least if they respect them.

Resisting giving in to sexual immorality though can be accomplished if you 1) acknowledge that you have a weakness, and are doing wrong; 2) Ask for God's help in prayer; Make all earnest effort 3) by avoiding putting yourself, or being in situations that could lead to sexual immorality; 4) by resisting giving in to do wrong.

If a person is in a situation already, where they may be, say, kissing, it may be hard to exercise self control and not go further. However, it will require mental effort to resist giving in, but there is time to do so.
It's obviously better to avoid finding yourself in that situation in the first place though.

I wish you well in your efforts.
You can win the fight. Just do not give us, but pray to God to help you not to give in either, and make every effort not to.

 

[CoreyD]

That makes sense, but what if the Lord doesn't send a quality and True Christian woman (or man) in our direction? I'd really love to be married again so that I don't fall into these kinds of sin, but I can't actually find a True, Christian woman that is available and one that has the same feelings for me that I might have for her. Now THAT'S a problem!

Job said, “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman. Job 31:1
If we are looking for a Christian woman, making a covenant with our heart and mind, not to get involved with anyone who isn't, can certainly help us not to be sexually immoral, I would think.

 

[Oneofhope]

Job said, “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman. Job 31:1
If we are looking for a Christian woman, making a covenant with our heart and mind, not to get involved with anyone who isn't, can certainly help us not to be sexually immoral, I would think.

Perhaps it is good to consider what act is required for a man and woman to become "one." Does this unity depend upon a written document from a worldly institution? True marriage begins with consumption. It seems, therefore, that this thread began with the admission of a marriage having already taken place. Though a worldly marriage has not been undertaken, this young man is not allowed to move from woman to woman throughout his life. Adultery is first of the heart, then of worldly laws (that desire to judge us).

This is the position that I personally hold, which is that the last woman whom I had "known," that woman is my technical and Spiritual wife. Therefore, I am to be faithful to her. When a man enters himself unto a woman, he is essentially sharing the Promise that circumcision represents. And so it is with his woman, that he is uniting himself with his woman as he is united with God. As a man is one with God, he is to be considered one with his woman. And though we may make a mistake in "knowing" a worldly, ungodly woman, this does not grant us an excuse by which to engage with sexual experiences with woman after woman after woman. We must accept the consequences of the mistakes we have made, even if they leave us living the remainder of our lives as ones set apart for Christ, our Nazarene Father, never to be romantic and sexual again.

 

[CoreyD]

Perhaps it is good to consider what act is required for a man and woman to become "one." Does this unity depend upon a written document from a worldly institution?

Some legal institutions may not grant documents allowing marriage for some, so it does not depend upon documents.
I would say, it depends on what God considers to be marriage, since God is the one who constituted that arrangement.

There are some people who live together, and consider themselves married, because, according to the, "they love each other".
Does God consider them married? Well no, since marriage is not a mental exercise.
So, to be married, the individuals need to take the action necessary, for a marriage to take place.

The first marriage was shown with these words. [God] brought her to the man. Genesis 2:22
There was no audience... well at least no human audience, and no documents.
They were husband and wife, in God's eyes.

In ancient Israel, the father gave away his daughter - the groom needed to have that approval,, and he took her to his home. It was understood by that process, they were married. No documents. They were husband and wife, in God's eyes.

Today, the custom is similar, in that the father gives away the bride - though not in all cases, due to different factors, and circumstances.
However, an officiator, performs the marriage ceremony, and in some cases, documents are made up, in order to have proof of the marriage - for legal reasons. They are husband and wife, in God's eyes - with, or without the documents.
However, God also requires this. Romans 13:

1. Every person is to be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
2. Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.
3. For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same;
4. for it is a servant of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for nothing; for it is a servant of God, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who practices evil.
5. Therefore it is necessary to be in subjection, not only because of wrath, but also for the sake of conscience.
6. For because of this you also pay taxes, for rulers are servants of God, devoting themselves to this very thing.

So, his people do not try to bypass what God has allowed for the tie being. What he provides is a protection.

True marriage begins with consumption.

I don't understand. What do you mean?

It seems, therefore, that this thread began with the admission of a marriage having already taken place. Though a worldly marriage has not been undertaken, this young man is not allowed to move from woman to woman throughout his life. Adultery is first of the heart, then of worldly laws (that desire to judge us).

I'm not sure the OP contains any admission of marriage.
Perhaps I am not reading between the lines, but it seems the OP is admitting to sexual immorality outside of marriage, and wanting to find a way to avoid repeating this.
Maybe I missed something.

This is the position that I personally hold, which is that the last woman whom I had "known," that woman is my technical and Spiritual wife.

Is that God's view though?

I know we have our personal feelings, views, ideas, etc.
However, I try to hold God's view, because I realize that my personal opinion is not really the important thing.
In fact, Jesus himself felt the same way, and I am trying to imitate Jesus, since I know that to do otherwise, is to be disapproved by God.
John 5:30

“I can do nothing on My own. As I hear, I judge; and My judgment is righteous, because I do not seek My own will but the will of Him who sent Me.​

John 16:27

for the Father Himself loves you, because you have loved Me and have believed that I came forth from the Father.​

Therefore, I am to be faithful to her. When a man enters himself unto a woman, he is essentially sharing the Promise that circumcision represents. And so it is with his woman, that he is uniting himself with his woman as he is united with God. As a man is one with God, he is to be considered one with his woman. And though we may make a mistake in "knowing" a worldly, ungodly woman, this does not grant us an excuse by which to engage with sexual experiences with woman after woman after woman. We must accept the consequences of the mistakes we have made, even if they leave us living the remainder of our lives as ones set apart for Christ, our Nazarene Father, never to be romantic and sexual again.

There are many persons that feel the same way you do, and they do give reasons as to why what they do, is acceptable, but can I ask, Do you think we need to conform to what God determines is right, or God should conform to what we determine is right?
At the same time, I am thinking of Matthew 7:21-23

What are your thoughts?

 

[Oneofhope]

I don't understand. What do you mean?

I meant to use the word consummation and not consumption. Big difference.

Is that God's view though?

I believe that it likely is. We are not allowed to put our ship into any port we like. The days of king Judah sleeping with prostitutes is over.

Do you think we need to conform to what God determines is right

100% of the time.

 

[CoreyD]

I meant to use the word consummation and not consumption. Big difference.

Hmm. So what if I a castrated? My marriage isn't complete.

I believe that it likely is. We are not allowed to put our ship into any port we like. The days of king Judah sleeping with prostitutes is over.

100% of the time.

Okay. I think we agree... except for the believe part - Perhaps. We'll see.
Nice talking to you.

 

[Oneofhope]

Hmm. So what if I a castrated? My marriage isn't complete.


Okay. I think we agree... except for the believe part - Perhaps. We'll see.
Nice talking to you.

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 NLT - "Suppose a man has intercourse with a young woman who is a virgin but is not engaged to be married. If they are discovered, he must pay her father fifty pieces of silver. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he may never divorce her as long as he lives."

The above passages indicate what I am suggesting, which is that the first act of intercourse is what creates a bond between two people, even if a violation has occurred. The bond is such that a public, worldly marriage is in demonstrable order. Intercourse is serious, and the New Testament, for the most part, supports the concept of only being with one woman throughout a person's entire life.

Interestingly, I don't Biblically read that premarital sex is a sin that "leads to death." Instead, I read that pre-marital sex is something that leads to marriage and taking responsibility for actions thus far made. When we circumcised men place our circumcised phallus into a woman, we are placing our Promise into them, and it is a Covenant that belongs to the Abrahamic family, those who live by Faith. This Mark on a man's phallus, if a man should possess it, is most Holy. No, it does not grant Eternal Life as the Blessed Jews believed, but it [does] represent the most incredible Promises and Blessings of a Circumcised Heart, Repentance, and the Gift of the Holy Spirit. Therefore, we should not flaunt our mark of Promise and Blessing, taking it to a long string of women throughout our lives.

It is time for men to grow up and understand what physical and Spiritual circumcision is all about, lest we take that mark and thrust it into a harlot, showing absolutely no respect nor understanding of the very Gospel of Jesus Christ.

 

[CoreyD]

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 NLT - "Suppose a man has intercourse with a young woman who is a virgin but is not engaged to be married. If they are discovered, he must pay her father fifty pieces of silver. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he may never divorce her as long as he lives."

The above passages indicate what I am suggesting, which is that the first act of intercourse is what creates a bond between two people, even if a violation has occurred. The bond is such that a public, worldly marriage is in demonstrable order. Intercourse is serious, and the New Testament, for the most part, supports the concept of only being with one woman throughout a person's entire life.

Interestingly, I don't Biblically read that premarital sex is a sin that "leads to death." Instead, I read that pre-marital sex is something that leads to marriage and taking responsibility for actions thus far made. When we circumcised men place our circumcised phallus into a woman, we are placing our Promise into them, and it is a Covenant that belongs to the Abrahamic family, those who live by Faith. This Mark on a man's phallus, if a man should possess it, is most Holy. No, it does not grant Eternal Life as the Blessed Jews believed, but it [does] represent the most incredible Promises and Blessings of a Circumcised Heart, Repentance, and the Gift of the Holy Spirit. Therefore, we should not flaunt our mark of Promise and Blessing, taking it to a long string of women throughout our lives.

It is time for men to grow up and understand what physical and Spiritual circumcision is all about, lest we take that mark and thrust it into a harlot, showing absolutely no respect nor understanding of the very Gospel of Jesus Christ.

We hear a lot of people say, "the scripture indicates something to me", and we hear of the Peoples Temple, Kidwelly, and others.
I tend to stay away from "the scripture indicates", especially when no other scriptures are used to verify the assumption.