How to not be defined by mental illness

[JesusIsMyTicket]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

 

[Korean-American Christian]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

I must admit that I am still struggling with my mental health. To answer your question, I have not yet "overcome" my mental health issues or "gotten past" my mental health issues.

I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression in 2002 (during my final year of university).

I was diagnosed once again with Clinical Depression and Generalized Anxiety Disorder in 2012.

I can relate to what you must be going through.

May God be with you always

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

I wish I had your perception and ability to articulate your mental health problems, when I was your age.
I had no clue there was any problem with me until my forties.
I guess my issues were mild though. I haven't been to a psychiatric hospital, not that I didn't need to go sometimes. I suffer panic attacks which make me too anxious to take on much of a leadership role in the workplace.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression in 2002 (during my final year of university).

I was diagnosed once again with Clinical Depression and Generalized Anxiety Disorder in 2012.

hey KA
Can you imagine how your life would've been if you hadn't been diagnosed or labelled at that time?

 

[Korean-American Christian]

hey KA
Can you imagine how your life would've been if you hadn't been diagnosed or labelled at that time?

If I had not been diagnosed in 2002 (and again in 2012), my life probably would have been more difficult....my life probably would have been more of a struggle.

Because I was diagnosed, I was able to obtain proper medication and receive weekly counseling/therapy

 

[JesusIsMyTicket]

I wish I had your perception and ability to articulate your mental health problems, when I was your age.
I had no clue there was any problem with me until my forties.
I guess my issues were mild though. I haven't been to a psychiatric hospital, not that I didn't need to go sometimes. I suffer panic attacks which make me too anxious to take on much of a leadership role in the workplace.

It did not exactly come easily. It just kind of happened. I was intending to commit suicide but walked to an ER at 3 AM instead. Me and God got REAL close right then. I tell no jokes here, I was crying out that I didn't know what to do anymore.

I will pray some of that eases for you. <3

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

It did not exactly come easily. It just kind of happened. I was intending to commit suicide but walked to an ER at 3 AM instead. Me and God got REAL close right then. I tell no jokes here, I was crying out that I didn't know what to do anymore.

I will pray some of that eases for you. <3

Nice story. Will pray for you too!

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it?

Yes. There are independent support groups sometimes with a brief appearance in the local newspapers and such - not in the yellow pages though (the phone books have gotten weird! ) --- pm if interested in how to watch and search for them safely. (and pray constantly) ...
shalom,
jeff

 

[pHoeNiX07]

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. But I mostly get manic episodes. I can only imagine what you went through. Having a close friend to confide with your thoughts and emotions is really important, a close family member can help too.

As I have discussed with a fellow diagnosed bipolar, having this mental illness is like a gift. It has made me more aware of how to take care of myself, how to limit myself with boundaries and to express myself rather than suppress.

I think voicing out your thoughts regarding your illness is good too. It might be a step for recovery.

Know that God is always there whatever you're going thru.

 

[JesusIsMyTicket]

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. But I mostly get manic episodes. I can only imagine what you went through. Having a close friend to confide with your thoughts and emotions is really important, a close family member can help too.

As I have discussed with a fellow diagnosed bipolar, having this mental illness is like a gift. It has made me more aware of how to take care of myself, how to limit myself with boundaries and to express myself rather than suppress.

I think voicing out your thoughts regarding your illness is good too. It might be a step for recovery.

Know that God is always there whatever you're going thru.

thank you for sharing this.

I think that is something I really struggle with there. I don't want to bother people with my negative headspace so I tend to just act like it isn't happening. Mask it off, so no one really knows about it. ):

 

[Greg J.]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

Ask me about my past (in person) and you'd get a couple hours worth of all the painful things I've been through (for decades). It would appear to the questioner than I feel defined by my poor health. But that's because that is what I've been dealing with most hours of the week for a long time and it has inevitably become a lens through which I see.

However, it is not a part of my identity. For the longest time my identity was "computer programmer," because I started as a kid all through getting a degree and years of professional work. I heard the question "who are you, without stating your name" posed and I couldn't think of anything else other than "computer programmer." I didn't like that answer, because obviously any person is a lot more than something so simply-stated (e.g., the sum total of all the experiences I've ever had).

A few years after being saved, my identity started changing.

I found this apparent contradiction to be interesting. Jesus said:

“If I testify about myself, my testimony is not valid. (John 5:31, 1984 NIV)

And three chapters later he said:

Jesus answered, “Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid, for I know where I came from and where I am going. But you have no idea where I come from or where I am going. (John 8:14, 1984 NIV)

I'm not doing to dig into the meaning of the passages. I mention them because they were a part of why I started asking myself "who am I?" ("what was it that Jesus knew?")

It's taken a looong time, but now my identity is "child of God," "(younger) brother of Jesus Christ" (Romans 8:29), "friend of God," "servant of God," "worshiper of God," "new creation in Christ," and so forth. It is who I am and who I will be, and to an ever-increasing degree, it excludes who I used to be (the "old man" [Romans 6:6, Ephesians 4:22, Colossians 3:9]).

Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. (1 John 3:2, 1984 NIV)

 

[Newsgurl]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

They are right! mental illness doesn't define who you are. I have severe depression and started being suicidal at age 10 and I would self harm to make myself feel better. I was put in three different hospitals from when I was 16 to age 23. I didn't want to go on anymore. I wanted people feeling sorry that I had a rough childhood and that I had it bad, but after a while I got sick of being pitied and turned to the Bible to help me overcome my depression. I read some verses that really spoke to me and I prayed to God to take all the pain and sadness away from my life. I want to be a new person and not let this depression take over me. It took some time but I now have it under control. Yeah there'll be days I'll be sad but 10 minutes later I forgot why I was sad and move on with life. Life doesn't stop when you have a bump in the road and neither should anybody that thinks their mental illness defines them.

 

[Bluerose31]

So, I am a college student, and in my social work 101 class today, they had guest speakers from NAMI.
Both of the speakers mentioned their stories and struggles with mental illness and management.

I mean, it was emotionally hard for me to hear them discuss such dark times, but also as they were talking I realized I had issues with some of the things they discussed.

They say mental illnesses are not "you". They do not define who you are.

When I was 16, I had a pretty bad breakdown and ended up in a hospital for 10 days. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I also struggled with self harm and had to find new coping mechanisms.

It is so hard to NOT feel defined by those things. I feel like they linger over me wherever I go. Either people are in disbelief I struggle with it, or they know it and can't handle it. I don't understand how you truly separate it. It feels like it DOES define me. It certainly seems like I am defined BY IT. I think I never figured out coping with the reality of yes you are mentally ill, no that doesn't mean it is all you are. Some days, it feels like it DOES define me more than I really define myself. It controls me.

I don't exactly know what I am asking for here. Has anyone dealt with it and got past it? I don't know. I am thinking out loud at this point, its left me shaken all day.

God knows how much our illnesses hurt us. He sees us in our brokenness and still accepts us.

 

[Far Side Of the Moon]

It did not exactly come easily. It just kind of happened. I was intending to commit suicide but walked to an ER at 3 AM instead. Me and God got REAL close right then. I tell no jokes here, I was crying out that I didn't know what to do anymore.

I will pray some of that eases for you. <3

I'm so happy you went to the hospital instead, Anxiety is literal hell.. I hate when people dismiss it...its such a messed up condition to live with. During my worst phases with this monster... It took my appetite away, gave me insomnia, gave me cold sweats, made me throw up, gave me panic attacks, and I also stayed at the hospital because I thought I was dying as well. Its horrible.

I guess the way to not be defined by it is by focusing on your other traits, don't let mental illness consume you..because their are many facets to your personality and who you are.

Like me, I'm creative... I like to draw, and I do it alot that's how people associate me as artist...

I'd hate to say, but if you're freaking out alot, people will associate you as a person that breaks down alot, if you cry alot..you'd be a cry baby...

I know it can't be helped as you have have an illness but when ever you feel it coming on try to be by yourself or at least tells trusted friend(s)

Don't show everyone your worst hand as people like to put labels on others,,,and not everyone can be trusted with your vulnerability.some will use it against you, so be discerning with who you are vulnerable with.

And bring other traits of who you are to the forefront as not to be defined by mental illness alone.