How to make your partner happy?

[eh7]

This is applicable to those who is attached:

For guys, how to make their gf happy? i.e. how to satisfy her?

For girls, how to make thier bf happy? i.e. how to satisfy him?

 

[Kol]

It's impossible to keep women happy or satisfied. It's best just to keep them busy.

 

[soulsearching1]

It's impossible to keep women happy or satisfied. It's best just to keep them busy.

That's not true. Guys somehow think that it's a huge mystery to keeping women happy, when it's probably the simplest thing in the world.

I think the key is to tell us, with some regularity, WHY you love us/care about us, not just that you do, and do things that show us that you love us. If you say "I love you" and can't give you a reason, then it means nothing. Comparing my last two boyfriends: Both claimed they loved me. The one didn't actually say it until we were breaking up, but from his actions, I knew before. Beause he was always telling me (without me asking) all of the things that he loved about me; the way I had opinions about things and wasn't afraid to share them, the thoughtful little things I did for him, etc. Not just "you're pretty"- meaningful, personality traits that he recognized in me. Fast forward a year to second ex-boyfriend. We said "I love you" rather quickly, and I personally, could give you a whole list of reasons why. But towards the end of our relationship, when finally I asked him WHY he loved me; and he didn't really have an answer. He was a good boyfriend, especially at first- you can be a thoughtful, affectionate person and care about someone, but there is more to it than that. Ex #1 just did things for me and treated me in a way that was a step above the rest, if that makes any sense.

 

[zerbetron]

Guys somehow think that it's a huge mystery to keeping women happy, when it's probably the simplest thing in the world.

Right on. I would have to agree. Women are NOT as complicated as you would imagine. I want the same things anyone wants: To feel important and desired.

You can tell someone all day long that you love them, that you find them attractive. But talk is cheap, its the little things. Take for example my ex boyfriend, and current best friend on the planet. We had EVERYTHING in common. But when I talked, this cat really listened to me. He acted interested, and that made me feel special.

We broke up because we grew apart.

The MOST important trick to a happy relationship, is knowing that your happiness IS NOT tied to your partner. And your partner's happiness IS NOT tied to you. You're happiness is tied to your relationship with God.

No one in this world can make you happy, and you can't do that for anyone else. Just be happy with who you are, and be happy you know and love God. The rest falls into place.

One last trick:
Love, and communicate. Understand the nature of the person you're with. Women want to be loved, and men want to be respected. When it comes to disagreements and fights, just make sure you tell your woman you love her no matter what...and ladies, make sure your guy knows you respect him. Communication is key.

<3
zTRON

 

[Hediru]

I agree with the previous 2 ladies. For me, I just need a man who loves me when I don't love myself, and says it as well as shows it. He goes out of his way to do things for me, not because he feels he has to, but because he just enjoys seeing me smile. What he doesn't know is that its the fact that he's doing something for me that makes me happy, not the actual thing that he does. A dozen roses is nice, but I am just as happy with a corny e-card that says he's thinking about me.

As far as keeping him happy, I am careful to tune into his likes and dislikes. I can't stand sports, but I'll go to a game with him because I know that he loves it. I find that I enjoy it almost as much as he does because I love to see him so happy. Likewise, he has gone with me to musicals and plays that he wasn't interested in because I really wanted to see it. Afterwards, he has smiled at me and told me that he is glad we went. It's give and take, really. We both do things for each other. Small things, big things, you name it. But as it was mentioned, true happiness comes from within. I've always said that if there is anyone on this earth who could pull me out of a bad mood, it is my bf. But sometimes, even he can't pick me up. The same thing goes for the other way around. On those days, I turn to God to lift me up. It may be hard to believe, but He is better than even the closest earthly relationship.

 

[Starting again]

Yeah, I agree also.
I think too, an important thing in a relationship is being yourself, and not being selfish.

 

[Kol]

That's not true. Guys somehow think that it's a huge mystery to keeping women happy, when it's probably the simplest thing in the world.

I grew up with all girls. Space aliens were easier to figure out, but I think I have an idea of how girls (most of them) work.

When dealing with girls, keep this one thing in mind: *they* don't know what they want. They *think* they do, but alas, they are wrong. Example-recent telephone conversation with my baby sister:

Me: "Hey, sis, what's up?"
Sis: "Nothing..." (sad)
Me: "Oh...well you sound sad, what's wrong?"
Sis: "Nothing."
Me: "Well it doesn't sound like nothing."
Sis: (Crying)"I'm okay, nothing's wrong."
Me: "Well, I can always listen."
Sis: "..."
Me: "So I'm your big brother, I love you, you know that, right? So what's the matter?"
Sis: ::sniff, sniff:: "Nothing."

Now, normally, you might gather from the context that *nothing* was wrong. My sister really spoke as if nothing were wrong. But the fact is, the more times she says, "nothing's wrong", the more wrong that something truly is!

So really, it's *not* a mystery. Just do the opposite of whatever the easiest alternative offered is.

Ex:

1. "I don't want to talk about it."
Answer: She wants to talk about it.

2. "You didn't have to do that."
Answer: This is exactly what you needed to do.

3. "You don't have to go if you don't want to."
Answer: You have to go, even if you don't want to.

I think the key is to tell us, with some regularity, WHY you love us/care about us, not just that you do, and do things that show us that you love us. If you say "I love you" and can't give you a reason, then it means nothing.

You can tell someone all day long that you love them, that you find them attractive. But talk is cheap, its the little things.

So...
1. Tell me you love me
2. Tell me you love me often
3. Tell me *why* you love me
4. Show me that you love me
5. Give me a reason that you love me
6. You know what, now that I think about it, talk is cheap. Show me that you're interested in me.
7. Tell me that you care about me.
8. My happiness is not tied to my partner.
9. Women are not as complicated as you imagine.
10. No one in this world can make you happy, and you can't do that for yourself.
11. Communication is vital.
12. This isn't working out, I think I need some time alone. We've just grown too apart.





Women are driven by emotion, not logic. If I tell my buddy he's cool, then he knows that for the rest of his life. Emotion appears to be stored in RAM tho, so you have to remind them every time they wake up as to why they are so wonderful.

...so?

 

[Keenan]

Oh dude don't forget, if you tell them why you love them too much then it's just clingy. And if you don't play the opposite day game then your just inconsiderate..

If you tell her she looks beautifull your obviously not being honest because you "always say that so it doesn't count!" And if you tell her her outfit doesn't suit her well.. "You're not supposed to say that!" Followed by a huffy puffy exit to the bathroom mirror.

Idunno.. women are complicated.. I'm sick of the hoochies and complicated dating rituals and opposite meanings. Men are designed for hunting stuff and lying in the sun not deciphering complex coded messages.

 

[Kol]

Idunno.. women are complicated.. I'm sick of the hoochies and complicated dating rituals and opposite meanings. Men are designed for hunting stuff and lying in the sun not deciphering complex coded messages.

Lol

 

[Rossi]

Right on. I would have to agree. Women are NOT as complicated as you would imagine. I want the same things anyone wants: To feel important and desired.

You can tell someone all day long that you love them, that you find them attractive. But talk is cheap, its the little things. Take for example my ex boyfriend, and current best friend on the planet. We had EVERYTHING in common. But when I talked, this cat really listened to me. He acted interested, and that made me feel special.

We broke up because we grew apart.

The MOST important trick to a happy relationship, is knowing that your happiness IS NOT tied to your partner. And your partner's happiness IS NOT tied to you. You're happiness is tied to your relationship with God.

No one in this world can make you happy, and you can't do that for anyone else. Just be happy with who you are, and be happy you know and love God. The rest falls into place.

One last trick:
Love, and communicate. Understand the nature of the person you're with. Women want to be loved, and men want to be respected. When it comes to disagreements and fights, just make sure you tell your woman you love her no matter what...and ladies, make sure your guy knows you respect him. Communication is key.

<3
zTRON

thats very true about your relationship with God.You have to be right with God first and get all your feelings of self worth from him and not your bf or gf.Otherwise you'll break up quicker than the ice caps!

 

[Hediru]

Oh dude don't forget, if you tell them why you love them too much then it's just clingy. And if you don't play the opposite day game then your just inconsiderate..

If you tell her she looks beautifull your obviously not being honest because you "always say that so it doesn't count!" And if you tell her her outfit doesn't suit her well.. "You're not supposed to say that!" Followed by a huffy puffy exit to the bathroom mirror.

Idunno.. women are complicated.. I'm sick of the hoochies and complicated dating rituals and opposite meanings. Men are designed for hunting stuff and lying in the sun not deciphering complex coded messages.

Remember guys, The cat mustn't call the kettle black.

Manspeak:
She: "So what do you want to do today?" He: "I don't know." or "Whatever you want."- I know exactly what I want to do today and it involves sports, beer, and your lips on mine, but I can't say that cause then I'm not getting any.

She: "How was work?" He: "Ok." - What a bad day!

She: "Do you think she's pretty?" He: "No." - Yes!

She: "Do you like my chicken?" He: "It's good." - I've tasted better cardboard.

He: "You're beautiful." - You're beautiful.

Conclusion? If he's answering your question, its the opposite of what he tells you. If he volunteers the information, believe every word.

Let's just let bygones be bygones and agree that women are from Venus and men are from Mars, and we'll never understand each other

 

[Hediru]

thats very true about your relationship with God.You have to be right with God first and get all your feelings of self worth from him and not your bf or gf.Otherwise you'll break up quicker than the ice caps!

Very wise of ou to say so. Thanks for pointing that out.

 

[Hediru]

thats very true about your relationship with God.You have to be right with God first and get all your feelings of self worth from him and not your bf or gf.Otherwise you'll break up quicker than the ice caps!

Very wise of you to say so. Thanks for pointing that out.

 

[Kol]

Guys only do that because women train them to. We don't do that around other guys.

That Venus/Mars stuff is steeped in pagan phallic worship anyway. Venus is carnal love, Mars war and manhood. Please don't quote that men are from the phallic god and vice versa as a reason why people lie about or misunderstand their own feelings.

 

[Keenan]

OK I've got it! BBQ's and soccer. No one can not be happy with BBQ's and soccer.

 

[zerbetron]

lol! Hey just let me clarify, if it involves beer, sports, comics, or food *i'm* there and I'm a chick. So, I think the smartest way to approach the understanding the opposite sex, is to understand that it is absolutely a case by case basis.

What works for me doesnt work for other girls. And what makes my fiance happy, didnt make my ex happy...so...it is what it is.

Humans are complex creatures. And the only REAL fact you can take to the bank is...none of us really really know what we want from our SO.

But as long as we all know God comes before that...we'll be right as rain.

 

[Hediru]

Guys only do that because women train them to. We don't do that around other guys.

That Venus/Mars stuff is steeped in pagan phallic worship anyway. Venus is carnal love, Mars war and manhood. Please don't quote that men are from the phallic god and vice versa as a reason why people lie about or misunderstand their own feelings.

I was just meaning that we don't think alike and using the common analogy. I didn't mean literally we're from Venus and Mars...

 

[Kol]

I think that people are people. Not all of the girls like girly things *all* the time, and not all guys like beer or football. That whole Venus/Mars thing is something you'd hear on Ellen or Oprah. We should embrace the fact that we are all human beings and get over trying to make relationships a game.

 

[zerbetron]

realtionships are a struggle, but as long as both parties work at it, then you have something to go off of.

 

[Rhododendron]

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