How to Help Boyfriend

[inmyownworld]

Sorry if everyone thinks this belongs in the sexuality struggles forum, but I really didn't want to post it there... if any of the mods want to move it though, it's okay.

What do you think a woman should do if her boyfriend confesses to her that he is addicted (and has been for a number of years) to pornography and masturbation? How can she motivate him to stop (or at least try really hard to stop; I know everyone falls sometimes) and still act loving and forgiving at the same time? It's hard to know how easy or hard to be on him... especially when he's so sensitive and has bad self-esteem as it is... and I love him so much... Any advice would really really be appreciated... I'm afraid I'm being too easy on him, because it's really not going anywhere... please help.

 

[lonnienord]

Does he love you? If so ask him not to do either out of love for you.
Does he love JESUS? ask him not to do either out of love for JESUS!!
Tell him that JESUS is always with him, always watching him and that it hurts JESUS so much when he does these evil things. When he does these things he is adding to the pain of the scourging of JESUS

Pray for him
Pray with him
Suggest he pray instead of doing pronography and mast.
Pray the rosary for him
Pray the rosary with him

Tell him that pronogrtaphy and mast. hurts his relationship with you and his future wife.

all for JESUS!!
lonnie

 

[inmyownworld]

Yes, he loves me and God. He's a devout Catholic so he knows all those things... he's just struggling so much.

 

[lonnienord]

Yes, he loves me and God. He's a devout Catholic so he knows all those things... he's just struggling so much.

good. yes it is a struggle but it is an important struggle you will show your love best by helping him struggle. He needs to get over these vises and you can help. Tell him it is important that he stop!! Tell him the things i told you in my first post. Don't nag but don't let it rest either.

 

[inmyownworld]

I really wish this hadn't been moved. The people who I wanted to see it the most probably won't now... *sigh*

 

[Henaynei]

MOD HAT - informational​

This thread was moved from OBOB because this is the forum provided for such discussions.... there are folks posting in here who are unaware of the forum rules and how this forum operates....

Please review the following:
Rules For This Forum, EVERYONE Read !!

Where are my posts ???? A guide to this forum.

MOD HAT - informational​

 

[inmyownworld]

Okay, sorry.

 

[Michelina]

Google "Theology of the Body". This will really help him.

 

[StAnselm]

Don't forget thatmarriage was instituted (among other things) for people struggling with lost. St Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:2 that "because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband."

That is, while pornography and masturbation are lousy preparation for marriage, marriage will be a motivation for him to stop.

 

[jezic]

Remember that this is not something that is going to happen overnight. It is very likely that he will continue to struggle. It is something that is hard to overcome, but can be done with love and patients.

Always be there to support him, that is a big thing.

Maybe ask him to talk to a good guy friend (or if he is comfortable he can talk to you about it). That will help him a lot. It is not always easy to bring up the subject with the opposite sex.

Pray a lot. That works wonders as well.

God bless
Jezic

 

[Irenaeus]

Prayers for you and your boyfriend, inmyownworld.

It's good that he can share this with you and you are good enough to help him. God Bless you both.

 

[Henaynei]

you could also suggest your boyfriend avail himself of the wisdom and support found here in the Men Only forum's sub-forum "Ponography Addiction Support"

 

[Vilnius]

This is a very common struggle for males, well, Christian males. Others don't struggle against lust at all, rather they soak-up all the sensual images they can and touch to them regularly. So, on the one hand, count your blessings that you are both Christians and you both know he is sinning. On the other hand, he needs to make the effort to stop lusting. I highly recommend you both read several books. You need to read them to understand what he is going through and to also know what steps he should be taking to change things. He needs to read them to get the motivation and knowledge to change. The books are:Every Young Man's Battle, Not Even A Hint, and The Sexual Man.

If you or he would like any further guidance, feel free to pm me.

Praise God!