How to act on the suspicion that one is depressed

[Fuzzy Fungi]

Hellos

I have very often felt rather down. But I always dismissed this as me being over-emotional, pathetic, or just plain complaining. I would always choose to ignore what was bothering me and continue on normally, because to make a big deal about it would be to make more of a nuisance of myself than I am worth. Many of my friends have real, tangible problems to deal with. I have no reason to be upset, and so I would be making an ass of myself to load my problems onto their shoulders.

I have often suspected that I may possibly be depressed, and I would browse websites concerning it. The lists of symptoms given, though, were always vague and broad, and I could not be sure whether they applied to me or not, so I would dismiss my concerns. "I do not have depression, I am just being an ass who likes to complain", I would think.

I browsed yet another site just a moment ago, though, and it was not vague and broad like the other sites, but very specific. 15 out of the 18 symptoms given described me perfectly.

I am no more inclined to discuss it with friends, as they have far more important concerns. In fact, I'd rather not mention it to anyone, really. If I mention it, people will make a big deal of it, and I hate things pertaining to me being made a bigger deal than they are. It is among the very small handfull of things that manage to make me angry.

What would be the best thing for myself to do? Whom could I go to to discuss this without involving those close to me?

 

[HoneyComb Son]

hello fuzzy fungi..you can go to a councillor who will not tell no one..just to talk..school councillors may help..i would advise you to go seek a doctor though...depression isnt something to fool with..a doctor will know for sure if you have depression.and a councillor may be able to tell you too.

but watch yourself ok..i dont know your situation..but being depressed is nothing to be ashamed of..dont beat yourself up about it..just if you want..get some councilling to deal with the probelm..

or if you want..i can pray for you..

laters!

 

[Fuzzy Fungi]

hello fuzzy fungi..you can go to a councillor who will not tell no one..just to talk..school councillors may help..i would advise you to go seek a doctor though...depression isnt something to fool with..a doctor will know for sure if you have depression.and a councillor may be able to tell you too.

School is out for me, so I cannot go see a school counselor. I may be able to see a doctor, though. I fear requesting my parents to get me to an appointment, though, because they will no doubt make a big deal out of it.

but watch yourself ok..i dont know your situation..but being depressed is nothing to be ashamed of..dont beat yourself up about it..just if you want..get some councilling to deal with the probelm..

My situation is fine. I have absolutely no reason to feel bad, but every little issue, no matter how small, feels like the end of the world. Every little error I do feels like a crime worse than murder. I am not ashamed, but the fact that I have no tangible reason to be upset causes me to be aprehensive about going to someone. I don't want to waste anyones time. I hate getting in the way of others, and to waste their time with a meaningless problem would be doing just that.

 

[LoG]

Sounds to me like you are lonely even when surrounded by people. Perhaps you are so busy helping others that they don't realize that you need someone to listen to you too. Compound that with having a hard time expressing doubts, fears, anxieties in your own life, leaves you with no one to turn to.
As a christian I highly recommend talking to that "unprovable God" for awhile. You will likely find that after pouring out your troubles to Him that you will be granted the peace to see through or be ok with the challenges you are facing.

God Bless

 

[Fuzzy Fungi]

Sounds to me like you are lonely even when surrounded by people. Perhaps you are so busy helping others that they don't realize that you need someone to listen to you too. Compound that with having a hard time expressing doubts, fears, anxieties in your own life, leaves you with no one to turn to.
As a christian I highly recommend talking to that "unprovable God" for awhile. You will likely find that after pouring out your troubles to Him that you will be granted the peace to see through or be ok with the challenges you are facing.

God Bless

I'm alone, so I should concoct an imaginary friend? I will not believe in something without a good explanation. I refuse to use religion as a crutch, or believe in God out of necessity. I'll get better and I'll throw the crutch away, and that would make the time I'd spend on my knees time wasted on a lie.

 

[prissybaby]

Hellos

I have very often felt rather down. But I always dismissed this as me being over-emotional, pathetic, or just plain complaining. I would always choose to ignore what was bothering me and continue on normally, because to make a big deal about it would be to make more of a nuisance of myself than I am worth. Many of my friends have real, tangible problems to deal with. I have no reason to be upset, and so I would be making an ass of myself to load my problems onto their shoulders.

I have often suspected that I may possibly be depressed, and I would browse websites concerning it. The lists of symptoms given, though, were always vague and broad, and I could not be sure whether they applied to me or not, so I would dismiss my concerns. "I do not have depression, I am just being an ass who likes to complain", I would think.

I browsed yet another site just a moment ago, though, and it was not vague and broad like the other sites, but very specific. 15 out of the 18 symptoms given described me perfectly.

I am no more inclined to discuss it with friends, as they have far more important concerns. In fact, I'd rather not mention it to anyone, really. If I mention it, people will make a big deal of it, and I hate things pertaining to me being made a bigger deal than they are. It is among the very small handfull of things that manage to make me angry.

What would be the best thing for myself to do? Whom could I go to to discuss this without involving those close to me?

My goodness! I know exactly how you feel. I feel that way a lot of the time. My Christian advice would be to tell you to pray and trust in God to help you through these feelings that plague you, but I know that although that sounds good, a lot of time it takes seeing a tangible person in your life to help you though your problems. I also hate telling the people around me about my problems, because I don't think I'm worth the concern I know they will show me. I don't know if its like for you, but that's how it is for me. I like to make others feel better because I know they have much more to deal with than I do. My advice to you is to talk to someone, anyone about what you feeling, possibly a professional. If you don't feel you're up for that, though I strongly encourage you to give it a shot, you should try writing out your feelings or something, or find something you truly love like drawing to express your inner thoughts. It can do a world of good. Depression is a horrible thing to go through and I would hate for it to get worse if that is what it is. I hope that you feel better.

God bless,

Priss

 

[LoG]

I'm alone, so I should concoct an imaginary friend?

Yep. Works for millions of childeren and adults. Can work for you too.

I will not believe in something without a good explanation. I refuse to use religion as a crutch, or believe in God out of necessity.

1. Pride talking, 2. I didn't say anything about religion 3. Necessity is the time God can most often be found.

I'll get better and I'll throw the crutch away, and that would make the time I'd spend on my knees time wasted on a lie.

If you get better it is because of the time you spent on your knees. Therefore it wouldn't be a lie now would it?

Having been where you are now, I hope you will go and find some one to talk to and be willing to really share with them what is going on for you.

 

[Fuzzy Fungi]

My goodness! I know exactly how you feel. I feel that way a lot of the time. My Christian advice would be to tell you to pray and trust in God to help you through these feelings that plague you,

I have been trying prayer lately, mostly as a sort of "experiment" to see if God is there, lol. Though it is calming, I don't think I can "trust" in God without knowing whether he is there or not.

but I know that although that sounds good, a lot of time it takes seeing a tangible person in your life to help you though your problems.

I have numerous people I can go to, but I don't like weighing other people down.

I also hate telling the people around me about my problems, because I don't think I'm worth the concern I know they will show me. I don't know if its like for you, but that's how it is for me. I like to make others feel better because I know they have much more to deal with than I do.

That is very much how I feel about things. Thank you. I love reading or listening to people who feel the same way I do about some things. It reminds me that I am not an anomoly.

My advice to you is to talk to someone, anyone about what you feeling, possibly a professional.

I will try. But the closest people to me whom I could talk to have their own, quite serious, problems to face right now. I worry that I would only make things so much harder for them if I were to begin unloading on them. I have a tendency to define my worth by how helpful I am to other people.

If you don't feel you're up for that, though I strongly encourage you to give it a shot, you should try writing out your feelings or something, or find something you truly love like drawing to express your inner thoughts. It can do a world of good.

I'm not good enough at any artform. And if I started something, I would likely never finish it. I always lose the drive to finish anything I start, I don't know why. It just feels meaningless. And then I proceed to feel like I've failed, and I have.

Depression is a horrible thing to go through and I would hate for it to get worse if that is what it is. I hope that you feel better.

Thank you.

 

[heron]

FuzzyFungi,
I think you're on a useful track when you brought up "definine my worth by how helpful I am to other people." When carried to the extreme, this controls your life. But sometimes people get depressed when they see no rewards, nothing to work towards, no meaningful goals.

You don't have to psych yourself out to conjure up something meaningful. I'm just saying that recognizing this is an important part of moving forward. Let go of what you thought you were, and allow yourself to move in a different direction.

Maybe you could take this time to plan for your future...write down your absolute best dreams and your mediocre ones, draw your dream house, make a list of how you would live if you could. Figure out how you could finance and prepare for a career you didn't think you could do.


"Without dreams, my people perish"

"hope deferred makes the heart sick."


Some other thoughts...I've read a lot on clouded moods and depression, and scientists are beginning to find localized infections and allergies that were previously unexplained. Check your house for mold, and try a couple days without carbs.

(Areas of Canada have had some changes in vegetation and climate recently.)

 

[DIVA_for_Christ]

I have been trying prayer lately, mostly as a sort of "experiment" to see if God is there, lol. Though it is calming, I don't think I can "trust" in God without knowing whether he is there or not.

Way to go God!!!

God is the one who draws us to Him. Even though you been praying as an "experiment" to see if God is there, know He is the one who has you experimenting in the first place. God knows what it is going to take to reach you and pull you near and in His timing, He will.

I'm excited for you!!!!

Psalm 139:13 - 16 (Message version)

13Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. 14I thank you, High God--you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration--what a creation! 15You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. 16Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day.

 

[bethdinsmore]

Hi friend
Sorry for your struggles. I had the same ones. I think it it really important to go to a doctor, even if you must go to a charity clinic in order not to let your parents know. Depression can be caused by many physical problems. In my case, it was caused by strokes - not trying to scare you, I'm sure that is rare.
A wonderful place to talk to strangers about these struggles is a Christian recovery group (even if you are not a Christian), such as Overcomers Outreach. They are at different stages of the same problems, and the ones who have overcome are extremely helpful in sharing their experience, strength, and hope. (You might be encouraged by reading my "Personal Testimony" in my website listed in my profile.)


God bless you, friend. There is life after depression. Please pm me if you ever feel like chatting. Aloha in Jesus.

 

[heron]

Beth--Strokes! You must have been relieved to find that one in time.

Here's a link to one of the recovery forums:
http://www.christianforums.com/f393-depression.html

 

[AvgJoe]

Fuzzy Fungi,

I hope the following link will help you. The link leads to an ebook concerning a cure for depression. The link is in .pdf format and can be downloaded for offline reading. Its a free download.

http://www.cathedraluniversity.com/depression/index.asp

Concerning your unbelief, please check out the links from another message I posted recently.

http://www.christianforums.com/showthread.php?p=17364969#post17364969

Feel free to PM me anytime for any reason.

God bless!

 

[Inperfected]

hey ya...

I'm not really sure what to say other than if you think you have likelihood is you have at least mild depression... But i really really urge you to get help... I've been there at aobut the age of 15ish and wouldn't accept any help, and like you, thought i mite have it, but wasn't sure... I kept thinking maybe, and ended up really bad... Nothing was good anymore and suicide was very close... Are you parents helpful? If they are then just try broaching the subject with them, as hard as it may be... if not, can you get doctors appt's without your parents knowing there? I know you can here...

Good luck, and though you mightn't believe, i'll be praying for you. And by the way, it's great you don't believe in something you don't know... If you did i would be worried.
But in saying that... I do believe, and i've seen things for myself, and arghh... i'm mincing words. What i'm trying to say, is don't believe in something you don't know, but on't hold back because of fear.

 

[Carico]

The best cure for depression is knowing that you are forgiven for everything you have ever done wrong! There is then no reason for self-hate any more. It is finished. But when we base our happiness on wordly circumstances and situations, then depression will always be a problem. 20 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression and put on anti-depressants for years until I was born again of the Holy Spirit. Then, poof, it was gone. Jesus is the great healer because unconditional love is the only cure for the human condition. I'll pray for you.

 

[VickiY]

Never mind a counselor...go STRAIGHT to YOUR doctor. Print out what you have written here if you think you will have trouble verbalizing it, and take it with you. Please do NOT go to a clinic where they do not know you. Your own doctor will have your medical history handy, and that will be invaluable. Further, treatment for depression is a long-term thing, and requires careful monitoring by a doctor to make sure you are doing well with medication or other treatments. Clinics do not give you that continuity of care that your own doctor would.

Depression is not a state of mind. It is a real illness, often caused by things such as chemical imbalances in the brain that are relatively easy to correct.

Your parents need to know about this. Show them that list you matched 15 or 18 symptoms to, and tell them that you feel it is time you saw a doctor. You may not want to burden them, or cause a fuss, but they are your parents, and love you, and have a right to know what is not right with you. If you suddenly broke out in a rash, or had other physical symptoms, you'd tell them. This is the same thing. If you suspect you are ill, go to your parents, and GO TO YOUR DOCTOR.

Best of luck!

 

[Harlan Norris]

I believe that deep in everyones heart there is the desire to find God. Our refusal to acknowlege this is the cause of a great deal of stress. I held out almost my whole life. I too was looking for some kind of proof. I definatly went through periods of depression. Finally, about 2 years ago I realised that there was almost no possibility, that God did not exist. I came to this conclusion because of current events. I'd heard that the Bible prophesyed these events. I'd never read the Bible. But I did start looking on the net for Bible prophesy./ I came across a site that pretty much answered all my questions. It was this site that brought me to Christ.Chek it out, www.purextc.org. It may be helpfull. By the way, I haven't suffered a days worth of depression since I first believed. Accepting Jesus Christ as our savior, is the only thing we are here to do. Once we have done it, the relief is immediate!

 

[gnine]

What would be the best thing for myself to do? Whom could I go to to discuss this without involving those close to me?

I suffered a bout of depression around 10 years back, in fact it was fairly instrumental in coming to know God... but thats another story that I won't go into here.

I've learned a few things about the experience that might help you make your way...

I don't think that the average GP knows an awful lot about depression and even more so, can't diagnose it correctly. If you present to a doctor and say that you're feeling down, they're likely to diagnose you as depressed just because they feel they have an obligation to tell you something (or they're arrogant and don't know what they don't know).

Typically, they'll follow that up with a prescription of potent anti-depressant drugs and send you on your way. This is not helpful.

The only use an ordinary GP has for you is to provide a referral to a psychiatrist.

They will be able (or at least should be able) to tell the difference between genuine depression and a normal reaction to circumstances that may be going on in your life.

This is an important point that is often missed - I'm sure that many people who are diagnosed as depressed are in fact having a normal reaction to something that is destructive in their lives.

The social stigma of depression is very real - as much as I hate to say it, people will treat you differently if they know. Only confide in your closest friends and never tell your place of work when you start a job... not sure about school...

What does real depression feel like? Its probably different for everyone, but for me it felt like this:

Depression Visualised

Thats a spider down there that used to live at the back of my skull.

This was accompanied every now and again by being a feeling when lying in bed of what I called a "lurch", you know how on a rollercoaster you can leave your stomach behind on a downwards bit of the track... it was sort of like that, except it was my soul that lurched and sucked me down onto the bed.

Praise be to God that He has cured me! I'll pray that He too shows you the light so that you too can be free.

John8:32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.

 

[If Not For Grace]

small handfull of things that manage to make me angry

in 95% oc cases ANGER is exactly what depression is:

We did not get what we wanted, expected etc in a situation.

The marriage broke up, someone died (we did not want them to). you can call it displaced, repressed or even justified (Rape, murder).. It still boils down to anger.

Find out what is making you angry and deal with it, or choose (takes practice) to be an optimist. There is an old story about some young boys down south who were frustrated with an old aunt whose reply to everything was "Well, it could have been worse".. They went to see her (knowing their uncle "Jesse" was away) and told her "Uncle Jesse" had been carried off by the devil...Her reply was "Well it could have been worse"--My word--How? they exclaimed..

She replied Well the Devil could have made Uncle Jesse Carry Him...

Smile--it's free