How long....Firsts

[sunshinejennii]

How long were you dating/courting/seeing your SO before your first...

Kiss, "I love you", talk of marriage, "oh you two are like an old married couple" comment etc..

Feel free to share funny stories, I'm happy for this thread to go where it may!


I ask because my boyfriend Matthew and I seem to be getting serious quite fast. In every other respects this is what I consider to be my ideal Christian relationship, God is central, but we didn't do the praying for 3months thing, we don't do devotions, lead anything or pray together or any of the things uber-christian couples do. (For want of a better phrase - my apologies). I have no objections to how serious we are, I really see this lasting and I do genuinely believe that he probably is my husband. Certainly even if he isn't, he's going to be a huge part of my life for the forseeable future and a very significant part of it, this is a relationship which if it doesn't lead to marriage was still very much a God thing and a worthwhile experience.

 

[sunshineray]

We kissed on our first date. It was an accident... but a good accident and I wouldn't have had it any other way. It just happened.

We said I love you 4 months into our relationship. We fell in love with each other over one week, even though it took us 4 months to get there!

And the marriage thing came up at around 6 months.

Every couple moves at different speeds. I know one couple who said I love you after 2 weeks and they haved heavily talked about marriage ever since.

 

[Wandering Cat Lady]

I love you...umm...about two weeks? We went uber fast though. Kissing, about a month and a half, again, we went uber fast. The married talk? About 4-5 months.

Hmm, we'd known eachother as friends for about 2 years, but neither of us ever really saw eachother or talked. Then last April we started talking over IM, in July we clicked at a going away party (I was moving to NC, I thought), things took off from there. Less than two weeks passed, I spent a week in NC and was sent back...in the emotional process of everything he told me he loved me, though it was more of a friend-to-friend thing at that point. Once I got back from NC, I hung out with him a lot. Few weeks later, we had the whole kissing discussion. You see, I was raised that there be absolutely NO physical touch before marriage. No holding hands, no hugging, and God forbid we kiss. But I NEED physical touch, I just do. Even in my casual friendships I always needed hugs. One day my now fiance looked at me and was like "man, I don't think you know how much I'd like to pull you into my arms and kiss you! But, you were probably raised against that, too. So I'll respect that..." l

ol...well, I was all weirdo for a bit and when I went to go, we hugged, and there was this deep emotional bond beginning to form and he just looked at me with those gorgeous eyes and said "should we take it there?" Annnnd I said yes, I am not against it. So we attempted a first kiss, and a second one. He was a good kisser, I had no clue. So it just didn't work. The second time around though, I told him I didn't know how and he said he'd teach me. Soooooo he taught me...it was funny though, I was standing there, shaking and a little embarrassed but totally fine with it all...it was just so new...he thought he was doing something wrong and offered to let it go but no, I was good. Finally, I caught on. It was funny learning though, I feel bad for the fella.

Let's see...we were told that we truly act like a married couple back in December. We were assigned parts in a Christmas play, and we were the mom and dad, we had two kids, stuff like that. We had to act very hubby/wifey and it came SO naturally that everyone thought we WERE married!! It was pretty funny...and ever since then, people have said that we act like a married couple. I like it

 

[Weasel7711]

We dated about 2 or 3 weeks before the first kiss (but that was a peck on the cheek). We are trying to save tongue until much later.
The first I love you... I prematurely said it over the phone after a month. But we talked and waited about 2 months until we were both ready for the relationship to move forward like that.
Talk of marriage? We both knew that we were dating to find a spouse, we talked about that. I knew I wanted to marry her within the first month. I gave her a promise ring after 3 months. We are planning on getting engaged in the summer so it will be about 9 or 10 months when we are engaged. (Hoping and expecting she says yes).
We dont talk too much in detail about marriage, we are waiting until engagment, but once in a while we talk about where we will live when we marry, what jobs, what kind of family we want, pets, etc...

 

[Tenorvoice]

We kissed on our first date (had been talking for over a month on the phone before we even met).

I told her I was making the concious descision to LOVE her a week after than. (I didn't word it like that, but I hate saying "Falling in love", because you don't "fall in love" Love is a choice that you make, it is a action not a feeling)...off soap box

One of the very first questions that I asked her was "what is your understanding of Ephesians 5:18-6:4, and 1 Peter 3:7"...we have talked about if the Lord allows us to become married what would we do. But I think (know) that I want to kick it up a notch, and really talk about it know. Which would mean three 1/2 months.

 

[Nobility]

We kissed for the first time... 7 months before we dated (I know, i know....) and then I said I love you for the first time about 5 days before we started going out. We began talking 'of' marriage about 2 weeks later, and he asked me 2.5 months after we started going out.

We got married 14 months after that.

 

[plum]

hmm..

kiss: first date
'i love you': said quite prematurely by him only a week in. i felt bad not saying it back and did it the next day. but ever since then... we honestly have only said it a few times and lately, it's not even said anymore. good thing? hope so.

no other 'firsts' yet i spose!

 

[eatenbylocusts]

I'm not sure where to start the timing from-probably the second round. We started emailing on eharmony about 3 years ago, but he lived a few hours from me. We had a first date about 1.5 years ago, but I ended up courting with someone else. After that fiasco we started emailing again and went out for our second "first date" almost 1 year ago. Our first kiss was on our second or third date. Never had a kiss like that before. We didn't start exchanging I love you's until 9 months later-him first. We talked about marriage in general on our very first date to make sure we both wanted to be remarried. He's talked about general things like living arrangements, but there is no time line. We both have talked about a min. of 1 year dating. That's going to be next week....

 

[sunshinejennii]

but I hate saying "Falling in love", because you don't "fall in love" Love is a choice that you make, it is a action not a feeling)..

That is so true.

 

[The Princess Bride]

How long were you dating/courting/seeing your SO before your first...

Kiss, "I love you", talk of marriage, "oh you two are like an old married couple" comment etc..

Feel free to share funny stories, I'm happy for this thread to go where it may!

Well, we went on our first "date" in Sept. '05, but didnt go out again until April 20-somethingish '06..(long story!)

First kiss...after our third "date"....also first "I Love Yous" too...(we'd known each other over a year by then....)

First talk of marriage....his dad actually brought that up after we'd only been dating 4 months!

 

[miss_klara]

Cute thread... it sounds like everyone's enjoying reminiscing!!

Our first hand-hold was 3 days into our dating relationship (we'd been friends for just over a year before we decided to take it further...)
Our first kiss was the next day! Like GWB404 was saying, Chris was pretty pro, and I attempted it twice, and then apologised!! After that, I decided to just copy exactly what he was doing, and things rolled nicely from there!!
Our first talk of marriage (other than a joking 'our future daughter' comment that we thought nothing of) was a little after our one-month landmark!! We'd just been at a youth camp and were driving to his parents' holiday home for a relaxing 3-day break, and as we were driving, he blurted "Can I be scarily honest with you? At camp, I was already thinking about proposing to you..."
Since that moment, we've talked completey openly (and often!!) about marriage.
Based on all that, I guess you could say our relationship's been pretty fast-paced. But we're not rushing into the engagement/marriage thing any time soon!!! (Although we really really want to!)

 

[sunshinejennii]

We held hands a few days after our first date, before that I had taken his arm, but thats standard.

We kissed for the first time a week later, on what was I suppose our second technical date, although I'd seen him several times inbetween at christian union events.

I'm not sure when marriage was first mentioned, jokingly other people mentioned it to both of us after about a month, he suprised me when after 6weeks he informed me that he had to marry me, because he and his housemate had agreed that if my apple crumble was any good then he'd have to! Since then jokingly it's come up a few times, After 2months he said he'd give me a ring, i.e. call me and a friend of ours mis-heard, so he teasing her about jumping the gun, but then when we were stood at the bus stop on his way home he said "seriously though, please don't expect a proposal for a year or so yet" and then earlier this week, and this is what prompted the thread he, on consecutive days, informed me that he loved me, and then the next day as I was waiting for the bus said "I wish you didn't have to go, at least eventually they'll be a day when you don't have to, and I'm taking you home with me" which I thought was lovely. I know we've both thought about marriage, we wouldn't be courting if we knew any reason not to marry, and timing wise it works very well in that we'll have been going out 2.5years before graduating and could therefore marry within 3years, which to me is ideal. I think it's a subject best not discussed too much though, we're comfy with it, and if he said something which raised a serious question I'd feel comfortable discussing it, but I see no reason for us to get too carried away.

 

[Luvworkinprogress]

We have already talked about marriage (from day one) because that is where we want to go if God leads us. We have only hugged and kissed on the cheek after 2 months because we don't want to stir that pot.


So for now we are waiting on some things but eagerly pursuing others . I really think our first real kiss will be at our wedding.




But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint
Isaiah 40: 31

 

[klynnmiller]

Hmmm...Our first kiss was actually on our first date, but that was after e-mailing and talking on the phone for 6 weeks before we met in person. (I think I actually had feelings for him before our first date, because we talked for hours everynight on the phone.) Besides, it was such an awesome first kiss, really, just perfect! It was so good that I went over to my sister's house right afterward and told her I had just met the man I was going to marry!!!

"I love you's"? Hmmmm...I don't know if I remember when we first said it. I just know that I have always "felt" it for him and made the decision that I wanted to love him after our first date. I think it might have been about a month into our relationship.

Our first serious marriage talk was only about 3 months into the relationship. We had been invited to the "Weekend to Remember" marriage seminar and wanted to go. We'd both been married previously, and knew that we wanted to get as prepared as possible and go into a future marriage with our eyes wide open and focused on Christ. Besides, he's such a good man that how could I not want him in my life forever?

I don't know when or if we've gotten the "old married couple" remark, but many, many people we've met have been very suprised that we aren't married, that they thought we were. When I was in the hospital, all the nurses called him my husband, and we just never corrected them. (That was about 7 months into the relationship.)

So here it is, 15 months after our first date, and we're getting married in 5 months!!! YAY!!!!

 

[ardeur]

First date: After 3.5 years of friendship.
First kiss: 2.5 to 3 months into the relationship
First I Love You's: about 6 or 7 months into the relationship.
First mention of marriage: right when we started the relationship. We made it clear that we were/are only dating with the end result of marriage in mind (casual dating strictly off limits)
Talk of engagement: two years into the relationship (5 years of friendship).

Even with this time frame we thought we were going a little fast on some things (kissing, I love you's), but we don't regret anything.

 

[A2597]

Hmm....

First kiss? Well...I just started a relationship about...a week ago is when it became official, but we had been dating for 2 weeks kinda at that point...making it official was step one.
So first kiss? Well...pecks on cheek is all. LOL! Dunno when we'll go beyond that. A part of me wants to save that for my wedding day, and the rest of me is like "How...in the world could I wait that long?" LOL

I Love You's? Not there yet. LOL I feeling it certainly, and I know she is. I think it's both a feeling and a choice. I made the choice to love her, and now it's CERTAINLY a feeling. LOL

Talk of marriage? Umm..last week when we made it official I suppose. We are both dating to find a spouse. Hasn't really come up since then...

For me, the hard part is taking it slow...but at the same time, I'm already fairly certain she's the woman I'll marry. (Known her about 9 months now)...fun fun.

 

[Briseis]

First:

Holding hands - one week before
Kiss - 2 weeks
I love you - 3 years
talk of marriage - approx. 3.5 yrs.

 

[Maramixi]

I'm loving this thread!

I met my sweetie in a physics lab in fall of 2005. After a few weeks I started to wonder if I was getting a crush on him and about halfway through the term I knew I did. I pretty much spent the next eight months or so pinning over him and driving all my friends crazy with Jason this and Jason that and Jason, Jason, Jason, Jason and the classic, "I saw Jason today!!!"

Late spring term we started haning out with some mutual friends, but with the term ending and him transfering, I figured I had to get over him.

I'm not kiding about this, the minute I that I gave it to God and let it go, I got a message on myspace from Jason asking me out to a movie! I almost screamed in the middle of the computer lab!

First date, we saw Pireates 2: July 14, 2006.
Afterwards, my mom bought me a bridal mag...

Thrid date we held hands for the first time and he asked if he should change his "status" on myspace. *giggles*

Forth date he kissed me, but I told him I wanted to save kissing.
At this point, his mom knew I was "the girl."

At about three months he told me he was "falling" in love with me.
After about five minutes of silence I told him that I was "falling" in love with him too.
(He told me later he knew he wanted to marry me then.)

The Sunday after Thanksgiving he asked if I would "consider" marrying him...
He asked me in the mall parking lot! LOL!

The next Tuesday I had the ring.

The wedding will be July 7, 2007; so we will have actually been together for one week less than one year.
(I wanted the wedding day to be the 14th but my pastor already had a wedding for that day).

Oh well!