How has NFP worked for you?

[CrystalBrooke]

A few weeks ago, my husband I decided to use NFP as a natural contraceptive. I've read that it's really effective, but I was just wanting to hear some feedback from actual people. So did NFP work for you, did it keep you from having children til you were ready for another? Also, did it help you to concieve easily once you decided you were ready for a child, or another child?

 

[sparassidae]

Well we were always ready for another by the time my periods returned, so we haven't used nfp for preventing pregnancy, or spacing pregnancies.

As far as conceiving, that is ultimately up to God, but nfp certainly helps. You've actually got something to "aim at" rather than just "random shots"

Of course this last baby was in one way a surprise, because due to a work trip I was sure we had missed my fertile time, and we only had sex right on the edge of that period. I was sure we'd "missed", especially when other months we had sex at the right time without conceiving. But God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl!

 

[karla]

Works great for us. We have 4 beautiful children that were all planned - especially by God! The great thing about the NFP mindset is that there are no oopsies - even when we are delaying pregnancy we are open to the possibility of life and trust that God has a plan for us and our family. When trying to conceive it has helped out because we know when I am fertile and it's not a bunch of guess work as to when I got pregnant and when was the appropriate time to try to get pregnant.

 

[RoseofLima]

Other than Andrew- I knew that I was likely to get pregnant with all of the kids we have had after Tim. If I had been diligent about following the rule of waiting three days in the presence of ambiguous signs- then Andy wouldn't be here (which I can't even imagine life without my sweet little guy!).

I am a little worried about it, to be honest...much of the last year we haven't gone more than 2-3 days without being intimate...and when my cycles return we'll have to have lots of days of abstinence in comparison. That's going to make me feel insecure.

That is great--that you have gone off of the pill--I just so heartily believe that the pill is so harmful for women. Anything which manipultaes hormones so drastically, just can't be good over long stretches of time.

 

[BlessingsROnMe]

Before my hubby and I had kids we were using somewhat of the natural method. I would calculate fertile days by my period (calendar method) and he would try to pull out(sorry if that is too much information). But our problem was abstaining. The night I got pg with my first child I knew that it was my fertile time but I was kind of relying on him getting out in time. At that time neither of us knew that the tiniest drop could "do the deed" and that men have a tendency to "leak". So soon after I figured out that I was pg. (I have an interesting way of telling that I am pg even before I miss a period.....it is like I literally feel pg). After I had her I was on ortho evra(the patch). I did not like that for many reasons. Mainly I did not like that two weeks out of the month we could not be intimate. For people that are not familar with the patch you put a patch on and wear it for a week and then change it on the 7th day, after three patches or three weeks you do not put on a patch for a week. Supposedly this is supposed to be when you have your period and you are not to have sex when not wearing the patch. But with me I would not have my period that week.....my period would come at the end of that week and so it would go into the next week. So therefore there were two weeks that we could not do anything. Outside of that they hurt pulling them off, they slid around and left nasty sticky residue around were the patch was and I did not like spending 40 dollars a month on it (I do not know how much it costs now that was 2-3 years ago). And I did research on how hormonal birth control works and was not pleased with the results....so I decided to go back to natural. But just like the last time, self-control was lacking and I was not keeping the greatest records. But had a round about idea of when I could get pg. When I got pg the second time I was pretty sure that it was my fertile time but not positive and we wanted to be intimate so we were and shortly I found out a I was pg again. After my son was born I nursed him until he was 13-14 months old and did not have my period until he was about 9 months or older and they were not consistant. So I could not chart them. Which led to me getting pg with my second son as soon as I stopped bfing my first son. With all this being said, keep in mind that I was mainly into using the calendar method. Meaning I chart my period and such. I had tried the mucus method for a short time and did not understand it much and I also tried the temp method but I did not have a basil thermometer so I just used my digital which was not very accurate and I would forget to do it around the same time or I would move around before I would do it (which you are supposed to wake up and immediately take your temp....not getting up or anything.) And if you are sick the results could vary so it was not my choice form of birth control. But as I said I never did any of these methods to the best of my ability. Basically my first two children came from lack of self-control. I new that I could get pg around that time and was intimate anyway and with my last I only had a couple periods since my last pg and I did not think that they were normal enough to chart because they would be shorter or longer or nonexistant.I am still trying to figure out when I got pg with him. After he was born we were kind of just leaving it up to God and hoping that I did not get pg again but with no period I could not chart it and I already told you how I did not get along with the other methods, so we were just leaving it up to God COMPLETELY. But a well meaning person found out that we were doing that and they convinced my husband to start using condoms....so that is what we have been doing lately. At first I was not too fond of the idea, but the more I think about it the more I like it. I have been able to be intimate with my husband without having to think much about getting pg again. (And yes I do know they are not 100 percent full proof). So I have enjoyed it more. I think it is the right thing for us right now. Given that my youngest is less than a year old and that I do not plan on having anymore kids....especially this soon. But ultimately it is up to God as to when he wants us to have more. We can try to do things in the natural but ultimately I believe he is in control. Although I do think he takes our feelings into consideration but he always has a greater plan than ours and he knows the future. So even if we think one thing....he know what is around the corner that might change that thought...hehe. Man God is soooooo good!
I don't know if that helps anyone or not but that is my story and I am sticking to it!

 

[faithmom]

HeHe.....it sure worked a lot better than the diaphragm, or the nursing myth.

So, I was one of those people big on birth control, and went through a long process before I even gave NFP a chance. And the more I have read and learned, I wish I would have opened my mind so much earlier. Here was my experience.

I felt terrible on the pill....I tried a couple of variations, told each time by the docs that I should feel better. It wasn't the weight gain issue. I actually would get morning sickness with a couple of them (amazingly I never threw up when I was really pregnant....what does that tell you!?!), my moods were worse than with PMS, and I had the opposite of acne...I would get eczema!

I switched to the diaphragm. It was carefully and routinely fitted and refitted, and we used the spermicide correctly and consistently at all times, and along came our 1st born daugher. No way would I change the fact that she was there, she's the best mistake (NOT!) ever made!

On 2nd daughter, I believed the doctor who said that all vaginal signs showed I wouldn't conceive while I was nursing and in my mid-30's. She said there was no way sperm could even survive in my vaginal canal, much less would I be ovulating (but hey! I was getting a light period! The Doc said it was probably just triggered by the uterine contractions that happen with heavy nursing.) Again, I thank God!

Then I briefly tried a "new and better" form of an IUD.....It made intercourse painful AND I had this nagging sense that my body might be rejecting an actual conception....I have since learned through research that this is true....AND this can also be true with the pill (go find the Physician's Desk Reference...it's the package inserts written for the medical professionals that you never see....it's more complete than what is handed out at the pharmacy, and yes, the pill can cause your body to abort a fertilized egg. It's written right in there on many forms of the pill) This wasn't acceptible to me, and I ask God's forgiveness for not learning more earlier!

There was baby #2. It was then that I started to study the NFP program materials given to us at our pre-marriage program. I began watching temp, tracking & charting it, and watchin cervical mucous as well. Using all of the signs we effetively used NFP to avoid pregnancy for 2 and a 1/2years, and CHOSE to conceive (effectively on the 1st try) in March of 2001. It was easily the easiest, healthiest and most effective form I used.

Note, I do not have a 28 day cycle. I vary from 21 to 26. With NFP I knew I conceived on day 11 that month. I also could tell the docs, with certaintly, with a baby who was premature, the exact date of conception, so we would know what do expect neonatally.

Plus, I also knew when to expect my periods. Wish I would have used it from the beginning!

Currently, because we cannot safely carry babies to term (explained in another thread), we finally chose to have my hubby have a vasectomy. Watching so carefully for signs of ovulation with the knowledge that we wanted more children, but for their sake were no longer going to try, was just too sad.

 

[chrislife]

NFP has always worked for me, when I've used it correctly. I've used it both to conceive and to prevent, at different times.

My first child, I didn't know NFP yet, and it took 7 months to conceive. My second, I had learned NFP and it took one try. My third, I wanted another and my then husband didn't; but he was willing to take the chance when I was fertile -- again, one try.

I've since remarried, and acquired two more that way. Pregnancy number four we were not trying to prevent or trying to conceive, and it took 7 months. My fifth, we had been trying to prevent for a year because doctor said to, and she was conceived 3 months after that year was up, because we were not being "careful" anymore. (We wanted the intimacy more than we wanted to avoid pregnancy.)

Number 6 (on the way) was an "accident," but it was my failure to follow the rules closely enough, not a failure of NFP. I had a cold, and had already ovulated, so I assumed it was safe, even though I couldn't tell by symptoms. As it turned out, I ovulated twice.

I figure God really, really wanted to make this one, so it must be a special one!

I've never had NFP "fail" when I've followed the rules. It has been effective both in controlling family size and in helping us to be closer.

---Christina

 

[ChristianMama84]

Hubby and his late wife used NFP, but they had sex on a "gray day" and she got pregnant. I'm sure as long as you follow closely and avoid "gray" and "red" days, you'll be fine.

 

[BananaCake]

Good question!

We used NFP (I just took my temp - no looking at mucous for me, it weirds me out ) for over 2 years before TTC. Not only did I not get pregnant during that time, I got pregnant rather quickly for someone my age because I already knew my cycles and my body very well.

 

[OrangeHope]

what are gray and red days?

 

[chrislife]

I must admit, I've never done the charting... I keep mental track as I go. (Ok, this is day 4 of being fertile, etc)

It means if I conceive, I can usually remember what date; but I don't really know the terminology of recordkeeping.

 

[BlessingsROnMe]

what are gray and red days?

I am guessing red is the days when you are fertile and grey are the coushion days ...meaning the days that could possibly result in pregnancy (sperm can live inside for a day or so) so if you are on the day before you ovulate and you have sex and the sperm stays alive and is there the next day then you could get pregnant even though you did not have sex on a "fertile" day.
Either that or it means the days when you are fertile and when you are on your period. Not sure....I did not use terms such as that.

 

[OrangeHope]

^Thanks! I'm looking into this new bc and told my DH about it but we both aren't sure about it cause of the "gray" days...

 

[EllenMoran]

We used NFP both to avoid and achieve pregnancy - sympto-thermal method (STM) as taught by CCL & supplemented with TCOYF for mucus descriptions.

The reality is that when you are avoiding there should not be "grey" days - either it's a potentially fertile day or not, and if ambiguous you treat as potentially fertile if you are seriously TTA. (I personally like the way CCL taught this as certain signs being positive signs of fertility, and if present you should treat as a fertile day). When TTC, those days of slightly-increased-but-not-maximum fertility would seem more differentiated vs. high fertility days.

Big time pros for us have been my feeling much better since being off the pill, encouraging ongoing discussions and discernment about starting a family, and not needing to interrupt things the way barrier methods force you to.

 

[CrystalBrooke]

I don't do actual charting either..it's simple enough to do in my head.

 

[ChristianMama84]

Are there any web sites that are good about explaining all of this?

 

[CrystalBrooke]

yes..but I don't remember the address Just google Natural Family Planning (or NFP) or The billings method..that's the one we're using.

 

[ChristianMama84]

Cool!! Thank you.

 

[southernmommie]

try the site for taking charge of your fertility. take each letter on the word for the site address. I would post the link but I don't have 15 posts yet so it won't let me. sorry.

 

[jgonz]

I wanted to do NFP, bought Taking Charge of Your Fertility, read it thoroughly, started paying attention to my cycle... and found out I had 2 or 3 dry days a month. :o Sooo, we didn't use it. But I sure learned a lot about my cycle!