how does it harm you

[vibrant]

how does pre-marital or non-marital sex harm you? affect relationships?

just curious. want to bring these preconceptions to the table instead of them always being hinted at.

 

[sallystrothers]

God says "lest God be made a fool, that he <man> reaps what he sows"

Yes there are psychological consqeuences. I would always dread when I was with a girlfriend who I could never see myself marrying, and have a pregnancy scare. The Bible speaks of soul ties associated with sex and one would need to go further in the Bible to research this.

Don't forget the loss of inhibitions about sex the more you have sex. Outside the marriage its not such a big deal, but after you marry you may find that sex is not much of an intimate act anymore.

Guilt. You are living in sin.

Invitation for demonic oppression. Any long term sin openly invites satan to join the party.

I'm sure others can provide more succient answers on this tpoic but that is what I can think of. FYI I have been sexually active with quite a few girls and regret all of it. I am weak when it comes to sex now!

Even this last weekend I had a friend visiting from out of town. I was completely infactuated with her in high school but I promised myself I would not have sex with her when she came out.

Sure enough I folded in. Thank God for His miraculous last minute intervention that stopped us! But I had already committed the sin.

 

[Matt.9:22]

The best illustration I ever heard was this:

Imagine you had two paper hearts, one red and one white. Now imagine that you glued them together and let them dry for a few moments. Now you pull them apart. They're the same as before right? Wrong. Even though they are no longer attached, they still carry remnants (or fibers) from their interactions from one another. And the more you attach them to other paper hearts, the more fibers they pick up until they began not to look like the red and white hearts they originally were. They begin to look like messes. So now imagine that you're heart and body are those hearts. When you glue yourself to someone else (or have premarital sex) and then break up, are you really the same as before?

 

[refredo]

I guess there was alot in God saying that the two, not three nor four would become one flesh. There is more to sex than just physical gratification. It would be wise not to let the water out of its boundary lest you witness another hurricane. Good things taken out of there rightful places always become tragic.

 

[LiveLaughLove]

Sex is clearly meant to be an act of unity between married couples...when a couple has sex, they are joined as one.

The last poster's illustration is very true. Another illustration is as follows: Imagine that you have one big heart. You are in your first relationship, and you are so in love--why not show your love to each other by doing the "ultimate" act of love? For awhile, things are great...but then the relationship grows sour, and you break up. A little piece of your heart is always going to remain with the person with whom you shared such intimacies. If this cycle continues, you will be left with only bits & pieces of what used to be your whole heart to give to your future husband.

Just my .02!

~ Regina ~

 

[ladake]

I'm new, but I think that as a single man or woman we must try to understand that until we are married (and probably even after) we are ultimately married to God. This is something that I'm trying to get into my innermost being, until that day my father walks me down the aisle, God is my husband. And just as if I wouldn't have intercourse with another man when I'm married to my earthly husband, I won't cheat on God and have intercourse now.

We've all fallen short and sinned. Fornication is a sin, the wages of sin is death...you can't get anymore harmful than that.

I think if we strive (and it's something I am striving for) to put Christ first in everything, having a sexual relationship won't even be a fleeting thought. It's not important in a single person's life and it shouldn't be.

 

[WalkOn]

Basically everything everyone has said I agree with. Pre-marital sex is wrong for the simple reason that the bible says we are to wait until we are married to have sex. Sex is so much more than the physical...it's a spiritual connection with the one you have sex with. That is why God says it is for marriage. Plus imagine if a person who is waiting for marriage were to marry someone who has already done the deed? I mean, even though the person who may have fallen is forgiven there will still be insecurities for the one who has remained a virgin. Just food for thought.

 

[Holdinfourth]

With all of the obvious aside. Sex can become an addiction. This is something the devil uses to take ahold of A LOT of men, and women, but mostly men. Sex has gotten to a point toady that it is deemed "normal" and "socially" exceptable. Pre-marital sex shows a lack of self control, and commitment. The sad thing is, that we are not taught abstinance, but "safe sex", where in fact there is no such thing as "safe sex".

I really liked the illistrations from the other posters, and have something to add to that. Not only do you pick up ieces of the person you have been with, you also pick up pieces of every single person they have been with as well. One moment of selfishness can lead to a lifetime of consiquence, and regret. Don't just learn from your mistakes, learn from those who have walked that road and know it all to well.

 

[MetalBlade]

The best illustration I ever heard was this:

Imagine you had two paper hearts, one red and one white. Now imagine that you glued them together and let them dry for a few moments. Now you pull them apart. They're the same as before right? Wrong. Even though they are no longer attached, they still carry remnants (or fibers) from their interactions from one another. And the more you attach them to other paper hearts, the more fibers they pick up until they began not to look like the red and white hearts they originally were. They begin to look like messes. So now imagine that you're heart and body are those hearts. When you glue yourself to someone else (or have premarital sex) and then break up, are you really the same as before?

wow that is a good illustration. I was going to say somethings to that extent, but I'll just leave it there.

 

[Kristin06]

From someone who has had pre martial sex...I will just say that there is a purden that comes with those choices...you are forever judged for the choice you made...God will forgive and forget but the choice was still made and it will always be with you...I lost something I can't get back and that is my purity and for that I relationships are harder to find and even harder to keep....

The analogy is correct...I will never be the same I will take me tiny parts of that person with me, whether I want to or not!!