How do you have a real loving relationship without lust?

[Aaron Schultz]

I've always struggled with this. Bible and God preach that lusting is the same as adultery. But how can you fall in love with somebody and decide to marry them without being sexually attracted to them first?

Thanks in advance.

 

[SkyWriting]

I've always struggled with this. Bible and God preach that lusting is the same as adultery. But how can you fall in love with somebody and decide to marry them without being sexually attracted to them first?

Thanks in advance.

Lusting for others while in a relationship is adultery against your mate.
Lusting after your potential mate and using that as grounds for marriage
will fail if they don't wash their hair. Once committed to your mate
lust is normal. Uncommitted lust is sinful.

Lusting for one person is normal and healthy. Lusting after many at once
is not healthy for you. But keep lust in check so it does not control your mate
selection for fleeting beauty.

 

[NBB]

i'm no expert but sexual attraction is very ok with God, but lust is like an unholy desire, an spiritual sin, like when you desire someone that is not your wife, or in homosexuality etc. Or maybe when having dirty thoughts with your wife.
The more you love your wife the less lust you can have with her. because it feels wrong.
Just my opinion i'm not even married.

 

[Valetic]

It's ok to have sexual attraction. Totally normal. I think when you take them beyond just that you enter the realm of immorality. I think you can discern for yourself what that might consist of.

The problem some people face is that they can't control themselves even in these boundaries and step into the realm of immorality. So a lot of people try to avoid being in these boundaries to keep themselves from crossing that line.

 

[dreadnought]

I've always struggled with this. Bible and God preach that lusting is the same as adultery. But how can you fall in love with somebody and decide to marry them without being sexually attracted to them first?

Thanks in advance.

Actually, I think lust detracts from the relationship.

 

[Saucy]

I believe these verses are pertaining towards once your married. You can't commit adultery while being single. Back in those days, most people were married by their young teens, so most of the verses involving this speak to married people. In fact, the bible says if you have burning lust, to get married so you can satisfy it the right way. I think it's impossible to not fall for someone and want to marry them without any feelings of lust or desire for them. Now, if you lusted after someone else while married, that's considered adultery.

 

[NBB]

But lust is something more than having 'lot of desire for sex'

 

[Saucy]

Is it really?

 

[NBB]

Is it really?

I think so, even the dictionary had a more religious view of lust some years back if i remember right. Search 'lust and christianity'

 

[NBB]

https://www.biblestudytools.com/dictionary/lust/

This is a more biblical definition of lust different from secular one.

 

[Dropout_Theologian]

I have Psalm 119:9 written in big letters in my Bible. It's good to check out different versions, but King James Version is my favorite. I choose to believe that God can purify my way and, by his powering, according to his will, I will do as his word says. "You will know the truth, and the truth shall set you free."

 

[Danielwright2311]

I've always struggled with this. Bible and God preach that lusting is the same as adultery. But how can you fall in love with somebody and decide to marry them without being sexually attracted to them first?

Thanks in advance.

When you agree to marry God you are married to him, And as so you do according to his commandments and love his commandments.

But to answer your question it is very easy and here is how.
Instructions on how to beat lust.

1. Use your computer less

It is a fact that in any programed image there are pixels that can , and are being used to hide sexual images to entice you into porn sites. Porn is a big money maker on the web.

2. only watch Christian movies and or videos.

Its also a fact that we as humans are tempted into thinking sexual thoughts after seeing sexual situations on tv or in movies.

3. Stop using your phone for communication.

Its another fact that on most all smart phones there are hidden applications that can send out hidden signals to your brain to make you think and act the way the advertised sponsors want you to.

Back in the 80 and 90s when I was growing up we did not think about sex as much, there was little time for that thought as we where not being programmed.

When I was younger I never thought about sex till the internet came out, I remember passing a sex magazine shop when I was a teen thinking to myself, wow, I want to see them.

So we are not tempted in real life unless we surround our self with them.

Ive been testing this lately and guess what?

The last week I have not thought about sex but a couple times.

You are what you present your self with.

You have to clean out your life and to do this you have to remove everything that is lust filled.

 

[Kenny'sID]

I think God knows sexual attraction is unavoidable, the very reason he made the fornication rule. As far as a good relation without sex, I'd say no, it's certainly not going to be as good as it will be with, but we just aren't supposed to go there till we're married...and I don't think too many of us like that rule by nature, we do it because big daddy says to.

 

[Eudaimonist]

But how can you fall in love with somebody and decide to marry them without being sexually attracted to them first?

Short answer: you can't.

Long answer: There's nothing wrong with sexual attraction in itself. The point is that you don't let it attract you to immoral deeds. If the person that you are sexually attracted to is available, there is nothing wrong with that.


eudaimonia,

Mark