How do you explain ADHD to those who do not understand?

[LetGo]

If "Joe" had ADHD as a child, he probably still has some ADD symptoms. You do not just "outgrow" ADHD. As an adult, they suffer different types of problems from children. Ask him if he has been involved in a car wreck, gotten several speeding tickets, (ADD adults usuually have scattered driving records). Ask him if he ever struggles at work, has changed jobs recently, has any relationship problems, does he smoke, drink, use drugs, ect...? Alot of adults that are untreated have some of these things going on. One point about the child not being treated: untreated ADHD kids are more likely to use drugs/tobacco/alcohol, as self medication, and are likely to get into risky behaviors, as they are impulsive. It is not always about just making better grades or not jumping around the room, their wellbeing comes into play too. Many people think that the stimulant meds will cause their kids to become addicted to things later in life, where the clinical studies actually show that a treated child is LESS likely to get involved in substance abuse........ Just some random thoughts.............

 

[dusky_tresses]

No he doesn't have any substance problems or with work. In fact, he's very punctual, has always had stable relationships, etc etc. He has the random speeding tickets here and there and has only been in one car accident. I don't think just getting speeding tickets and car accidents means that someone is ADHD. If you cannot outgrow it, then are there ways that someone could suppress or control their symptoms?

 

[christianmomof3]

For the parents of children with ADHD, what were some of the behaviors that made you think that perhaps, something wasn't right? how were you able to differentiate that between your child just being "bad"?

Well, I was a middle school teacher for 13 years, so you would think I would recognise adhd in my own child, but when it is something you live with and especially since she is my oldest, I did not recognise it until she was in 5th grade and then I thought it was add, not adhd because she has always been active and I am used to it. I realized she might have problems due to school problems.
It is difficult to explain add/adhd to someone who has not experienced it or seen quite a bit of it.
I think I have add, but I did not realize it until my dd was diagnosed.
The first time I really understood what add felt like was when I stopped nursing my oldest dd and my hormones went just a little nutty and I spoke to my dr because I absolutely could not concentrate even when I needed to and I was an adult and I knew what I should do and I really could not and it was making me crazy and he prescribed meds, but my hormones straightened out in a few days so I did not take the meds, but I realized that THAT was what add feels like - it is not a matter of making yourself try harder - it is a frustrating thing to know what you need to do and not be able to do it.

 

[mbrobeck06]

with my little boy age 4, we got letters from daycare almost everyday. He has now been kicked out due to his violant tempers.Our son would go to bed at 2 am and be up at 5 or 6. he would wake up and instantly be so hyper that we could not control him this would start before he even had a drink of water.He is the youngest of 5 so we had a little more knowledge on how kids act and all. our son was so violant during his tantrums that he would hit kick bite and then when he calmed down a little to breathe he had no clue what had just happened..we did deside to put him on meds not to make him different but to help him be able to concentrate and calm down a little..... like i said he is the youngest of 5 children one of which has cp and one of which is also ADHD and medicated. The meds honestly were our last chance in keeping our son safe and out of child protective services hands due to the fact that he was kicked out of daycare.

 

[Vehementi Dominus]

Y'know, I've always wondered whether or not meditation would be good for ADHD.

 

[Eichblatt]

ADHD 'help' doesn't help me. Drugs simply make you less happy. ADHD gives me the ability to be easily amused, and to find humor in great ways. And that's a gift. If a drug is going to depress me, JUST so some whiny jerk out there doesn't have to be annoyed by me... He'll have to get over it. Because I'm not going to be turned into someone I'm not, just so someone else doesn't have to look away from their newspaper every once in a while.

 

[San54]

First grade IS usually the year that convinces most parents (after blaming everyone from themselves to the custodian) That their little love dove had an issue .
In a classroom settings ADD students have great difficulty attending. Individualized instruction was almost always a must. These students need lots of encouragment and consistency.
I often tell parents that their little one was not bad, or mean but that they had great difficulty seeing the consequences of poor choices beforehand. Some of these poor choices were done on a continuous basis with consequences that made the little one miserable.These childen are usually very sorry for their poor behavior.
The other thing is that ADD children have complained to me of having racing thoughts ,so before they know what has occured they are in trouble.They can't stop to think I am going to get in trouble if I leave the center and visit my friend. When they come to themselves they are at their friend's center visiting. They sometime have problems keeping friends because their friends become more mature as the school year goes on.
The school psychologist says these children have average or above average intelligence.
Please tell Joe that it sounds like he may have had behavior problems that he was able to control,and he as he got older he was able to see and change the error of his ways.He may just have needed a good spanking or a trip to the time out chair.
A Psychologist said to me that most of the children that are truly ADD donot out grow the symdrome.They learn to manage it.She also said that it is important to get help while the children are little because she says that the jails are filled with ADD Adults. She continued describing how as a group they have poor interpersonal skills,failed marriages ,and poor job performance.
Simply because they were not taught to manage their behavior(with drugs if needed) when they were younger.Sadly she said that street drugs are sometime used to self medicate these unhappy youngster.
My prayer are with you and God bless You All.

 

[homeofmew]

Most educated people know what ADD/ADHD is now.
Actually a lot of people know about stuff like Tourette Syndrome..

 

[Knightlock]

As a person who as ADD I can assure you that it is very real and in someways has ruined my life (I did not learn how to read well until my late twenties.) But I can also say that it has been a wonderful gift as it helps me with writing and imagination.

The best way that I can discribe what it is like to have ADD is that your mind is like a television in which someone has the remote and keeps switching the channel every five seconds.

How I cope with it is the same way that a person copes with noise in a room full of people, you just get used to it and go on. But the noise never stops. Ever.

Although I have some focus and have kept a steady job for some years now (thus proving my family wrong) it has never been easy and I suspect it never will be for a person who has a physical problem can get sympothy much easier than one whose problem cannot be seen. In that person's case they just appear odd and are avoided as I have been most of my life.

I have had some friends but never have dated and am not married although I would like to be. But as I said most people look upon me as though I am weird. I have gotten used to it but to this day it is still painful.

I do know that medicine is not going to help most people but understanding will be. So I would suggest telling this person if he is a Christian to show Christian compassion.

 

[Bay]

We don't have to explain it to anyone family or friends wise. We are surrounded with others that suffer with it. I've never had to actually put it into words ecept in a medical form.

 

[KNewStart]

What I see as a big problem is people juming to prescription drugs when often DMAE and DMAE combinations made especially for ADD and ADHD work very well for many children with no side effects and are very cost effective.

DMAE?

 

[motherprayer]

How do I explain this without seeming defensive or insulting him? Because I've gotten to the point where I am getting defensive on behalf of the children I've worked with.

I think maybe a bit of understanding might be needed on your part.

I tell people often (after they question my nutsoness) that I have one of the worst cases of unmedicated ADHD they have ever seen. I have been asked if I abuse stimulants before lol

I grew up in special education classes because I was so out of control I couldn't be in with the rest of the kids. I was, and still am, a hyper mess.

That being said, many are not quite as honest as me when describing their issues.

I have never been medicated, and while I know it could have helped me tremendously as a child, I also am glad for the coping skills I have been forced to learn as a result of growing up without chemical help. I am a bit wild, but I have a job, and I am well appreciated by my coworkers.

I do recognize the need for many children to be on meds, I'm not saying that NO child should have medication, and if he is saying that then the best you can do is try to help him understand that while his situation might be different, others truly need it, and therefore he has no right to judge a parent who chooses to medicate an out of control child.

I hope this helps!

 

[tinalmanza]

ADHD is a learning disorder. It cannot be outgrown without proper medication and therapy. For those who cannot simply understand this, better take that person to the doctor and have him listen to the expert personally. You can also present scientific research and videos related to ADHD to further illustrate this condition.
[music.sound-add-adhd-treatment.com/adhd-music-therapy-options]