How do you deal with anger?

[flabbergasted]

I was saved several years ago. I did not take my baptism very seriously though.

I confess, as shameful as this is, that my habits have not improved at all over this time.

To make many long stories short: I've made a commitment to get right with god and have started to work on some of my habits. I also must admit I've only made this decision this week and am having major doubts about my ability to follow through. This is not to say I will not, because I believe I will, but from my vantage point I have a very difficult road to travel and I am overwhelmed with it.

Finally to my question. I have deep seated anger in my heart. The anger is so deep I often can't control it. It is often a childish anger but it is also an anger of feeling incapable or out of control. Where I normally express this anger is at work where I have to bottle it up as much as possible. It seems as though if I attempt to stifle it or change my thoughts the anger just gets stronger.

Also my father was similar to me in this regard. We both have difficulty expressing our "issues".

I have been praying about this but it seems hopeless. I just can't see a scenario where I can effectively deal with this on a regualar basis.

Is there any Christian Wisdom to be shared in this regard.?

 

[Sketcher]

I don't have an encouragement except that you're not the only one out there.

 

[Saved_Youth]

Praying and thinking things through is always good. You might like to try and keep a journal were you can write all your thoughts down and look back at it so maybe you can pin point where this anger is coming from.

 

[pinoyjedi]

well, try..

 

[The Sick Man of Asia]

Understanding your situation and talking about it helps.

I have alot of pent of rage myself coming from my in-home family problems. Its been confusing me all my life because of all the lies up until the point where I finally wrote everything down on my computer notepad.

I knew what the problems were and was finally able to start the healing process. Just knowing in itself helped in subsiding the anger quite a bit.

 

[tturt]

This isn't a hopeless situation. If you're angry at others, then ask Yahweh to help you forgive them and to bless them. You want Him to forgive you - right? So you've got to forgive them. It may take praying for them a lot of times - not just once or twice. How many times? Until there's no pain.

Pray your petition before Him and let Him give the solutions to your problems. Read something like "How to Hear from God in a Noisy World."

You're right you can't do this alone. It is a day to day battle - we all have them - sometimes just different battles but our lives are so much easier when we rely on His strength (Phi 4:13) and ask for wisdom (James 1:5). Instead of trying to change several things at one time, why not just work on one thing at a time? It's going to be very difficult to begin with - changing our thinking to His way of thinking is never easy but over time it will get easier.

Thank goodness you realize you need to correct this situation b/c the aim of all believers is the fruit of the spirit = Yahweh is always the answer.

 

[cricrazy]

I dont get angry that often. I do keep grudge against somebody, which I shouldn't!

 

[CVL]

Address your anger. Vent it and disarm it. Don't ignore it. Don't over-indulge in it either. That just leads to bad habits. To disarm it, talk about it. To vent it, go to the driving range and hit a few golf balls.

Also, when you vent, it's easier to think clearly and be more rational about the true causes of anger. You can then deal with them more efficiently.

 

[suzybeezy]

I use to have major anger issues, and still today it creeps back in from time to time. I had to continually pray for forgiveness when I had an anger outburst and I had to start asking for forgiveness from those who were the recipients of my anger. That really helped keep me accountable for my actions. I also started praying that the Lord would work this anger out of me and he did so in a rather cool way.

One day I was driving and having a major bout of road rage with a driver behind me. We were both engaged in screaming and hollaring out the window and slamming on the brakes etc., just a pathetic display of rage. God was certainly the furthest thing from my mind. I recall looking up in my rear view window and seeing a 'I love Jesus' bumper sticker and thinking to myself "HAH Some kind of Christian you are!" to which I was immediately convicted in my heart from God that I was behaving no better. I had to pull over and cried so hard and said "ok Lord, lesson learned". Now that's not to say I never had an anger outburst again cause I am human and still make mistakes, but by allowing God to teach me and show me, I have grown and its become far less of a problem.

I hope this will encourage you.

 

[Brendan1000]

When I was a kid, I had a bad habbit of hitting my sister. My dad went and bought me a blowup Bugs Bunny punching bag and wanted me to wail on that instead. At first I was scared because I didn't want to hurt Bugs Bunny but eventually I got into hammering away at it.

To make a long story (well, I guess a sort of short story) even shorter, all I can say is that you need to find one way to release it and you need to avoid bottling it up over long periods of time. Sometimes in more recent days when I try to say just one good thing about people who annoy me, I feel more at peace with my surroundings. Even if you are still angry at the end of the day, find a way to release it before the next day begins and you might feel a lot better about the situation because it won't go away on its own.

 

[SharonL]

One thing that will help is to look up in a Bible concordance the word anger, angry, temper - read all those verses - there is a reason for this.

There is a reaction to every action - these verses will show you why some things in your life are happening - it was a real eye opener for me.

Another thing that really helped me was someone on the forum pointed out that I may not be harboring unforgiveness and that I just might be needing someone to recognize that I had been treated wrong - well that did it - that was exactly what was bothering me - all my life I had come in second to my brother, who was sickly all his life and needed the extra attention - but I just needed for someone to realize that I was done wrong - all the bent up anger left me - and for those that look at this forum as "just a forum." - well I would not trade that bit of wisdom for anything - it has helped me tremendously.

Once you have done this - write it all down - sort out what you can do something about on one piece of paper and what you cannot do anything about on another - look at it and see where you have a lot of misplaced anger - there are just some things in life we have no control over.

The person you have a grudge over is not the one hurting - the grudge will eat you alive - after you read all the verses on anger - you will see this disappear.

Praying for you.