How can you survive more than one pregnancy loss?

[cassandra4]

My husband and I have been together for almost 10yrs. And are so much in love, we have tried for several years to conceive. This past February 06, we were so excited to find out that we would be blessed with a baby. But that dream was short lived when we found out the pregnancy was ectopic. In the crisis we have become closer which was never thought possible, but found myself wanting to give up on trying again. In a promise made to my wonderful husband, I barreled through the emotions, and gave our dream of being parents another chance. First month of retrying, I found out that we were pregnant again.........But more than excited, I was terrified of losing another. And so it happened, just as I feared......This one was a miscarry.
With the strength that I carry through my faith, I am wanting to try again.
I just need some advice, tips, and encouragement that not all is a loss. I hear of women going through this countless time, how do you BARREL through?

 

[cassandra4]

oops why no replies.

 

[cassandra4]

Nobody here to reply.

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

So sorry for you loss.I'll pray that you get threw this horrible time in your life and can get pregnant soon as possible.

 

[cassandra4]

Thanks for your all replies.

 

[quietheart]

I'm so sorry Cassandra. I still mourn my babies almost every day. I don't really remember how I got through it, I do know at one point I almost didn't. I had to have my tubes tied after my son was born, I simply couldn't go through the mental anguish any more. I'm very very lucky that I have my 3 amazing children, if it weren't for them I honestly don't think I would have made it. All I can tell you is I'll pray for you and hope that if you choose to continue to try to have a child that God will give you the strength.
Es

 

[goldenviolet]

i wish so much that i had been able to keep contact with my friend rhonda. back when i was a young momma; she and her hubby tom had lost four babies. the first four where miscarried. so heart breakingly shocking, their first born died at one month old of sids.
i cried for days not understanding this tragety. i cried so hard at the funral rhonda came to me and tried to comfort me! her words will forever be in my heart: "the Lord gave us a beautiful family, He chose us to carry them, but Him to raise them. their place in heaven is already secured". the last year i saw her, she had three lovely children. i stand in awe of her strength after so much hurt. she was trying to get them all down for a nap; so she could nap, and said to me: "i'm possitive the Lord wanted me to be a good parent and bless these children to Him, so He taught me to hold everyday precious." ......... most parents take for granted the things before us. children are hard to raise. you may have alot of heartache... but the joy and blessings you can recieve through your pain; because the Lord brings all things good to those who serve Him; will be far beyond my understanding. bless youir heart. you are being a survivor... it's ok to hope again. these life's trials can't touch our hearts that the Lord holds so tenderly when we need Him. xo

 

[quietheart]

That's very true Dee, I am so very lucky to have my not so little ones. They are all unique and I'm thankful every day for them.
Es

 

[CaseyK]

I just wanted to tell you I am thinking of y ou. I had a miscarriage in August and another one in December. It is hard and after the one I went through in August I spiraled into depression but am recovering now thanks to the Lord! I pray that you find peace and comfort and that God will provide you with a sweet blessing

 

[BBgrey]

Cassandra,

I'm so sorry to hear about your lost little ones. I miscarried twice as well (both at three months), and it was devastating. Even though it has now been over two years since my first miscarriage, I still cry over those lost babies from time to time.

Fortunately for me, I found a doctor who ran about twenty different tests and found the cause of my miscarriages -- a rare genetic blood clotting disorder. I began taking asprin and a daily shot of blood thinners.

When I became pregnant for the third time, the first three months were so hard! Even though I was taking medicine to help, I was still very scared. I knew that worrying was bad for the baby, so I tried not to worry, but then I was just worrying about worrying on top of everything else.

I think you have to be realistic about that. It's okay to still be sad, and you can't help being a bit worried, I think. It's good to try to think positively and focus on the good things in your life, but don't try to repress any concern for the pregnancy -- it will just stress you out more.

I think one of the hardest parts of miscarrying was the issue with my own identity as a mom. I felt like a mom but had no baby to mother.
Getting pregnant and having a baby (mine is 8 months old now) doesn't ever take away the pain of miscarriages entirely. But you are at least able to deal with that identity crisis a bit better.

PM me if you want

bb

 

[AnchoredInChrist]

I lost my first at 20 weeks. At 18 weeks the doctor had found I had an incompetent cervix, and I had to undergo surgery. Then complete bedrest and meds to stop me from going into labor. But it was not to be, we lost little Savannah Jo. And I was devastated.
Then I found out I was pregnant again about 2 months later. I was terrified I would miscarry again. I did have a little scare early on but it cleared up. Then I had another surgery. And then I had my son, Caleb, at 37 weeks. And I knew he was my miracle baby!! When Caleb was about 2 1/2 I found out I was expecting again, I was thrilled. We had been trying for over a year and I was beginning to think we wouldn't have another child. I went to Dr. and then 2 days later miscarried. I realized what a true miracle and blessing my Caleb really was!! We have tried for 2 years since then and God has not given us another baby but I praise Him for Caleb!!

It's hard to lose a baby and then try again but you just have to pray and put your trust in God. Every day when I was pregnant with Caleb I feared that I would miscarry; but I also prayed that God would protect me and the baby and He did.

I will be praying for you!!

 

[lizadeller]

A natural miscarriage can take considerably longer. You may have to wait days or even a couple of weeks before the bleeding and cramping begin. (Don't go more than two weeks without talking to your doctor about possibly getting a D&C. Studies show the longer you carry a lost pregnancy, the more likely you are to get seriously depressed, and the more likely you may have physical complications.) The actual miscarriage may only take a few days, or may drag out over several weeks.