How Can I Suffer With Christ?

[wmc1982]

I've read verses about suffering in Christ and the topic is a bit confusing because of my situations. I have fear that I'm not suffering enough for Christ. That my sufferings I go through are from my sin, therefore not in/with Christ.

I've been diagnosed bi-polar and high functioning autistic/aspergers and for example I've drank a lot in my life to escape pain and to help me be around people. Now I'm just not feeling like I'm able to even go to a physical church. I've been watching sermons most days during the week and a lot of teaching lately. Sometimes I feel like from my sin God is keeping me out of the church so I don't spoil it or cause anyone stress from my problems.

To be with Christ we must suffer with Him. I'm really praying and I need to know what kinds of sufferings that I may have already gone through, or to look forward to. I want to suffer with Christ, not suffer for no reason in sin. Being alone 99% of the time makes it hard for me to feel like I'm suffering for/with Him at all. I'm not facing persecution, it's hard for me to be a witness at all where I would be mocked. I worry that if I'm not suffering then something is wrong. How can someone like me suffer along with Christ? Fasting? Not buying things for myself but giving more? I'd love to be able to be a missionary and suffer for the spread of the Gospel or be a street preacher and be mocked sharing the Word/Gospel. I feel like I'm completely useless for the Kingdom. I do have faith in Christ and know He is Lord and was raised from the dead to atone for my sins. But the specific verses that say if we don't suffer with Him we don't reign with Him bother me. And I'm so socially awkward and shy I feel it's almost impossible to even witness to people or talk about Christ. I want to have a missionary mindset even if I don't leave this town.

Any examples, help, or prayers appreciated

(Just found this, starting to read it now - http://www.gotquestions.org/suffering-for-Christ.html ).

I just don't want to feel alone and that I'm the only one not suffering. My only hope is in Christ and I don't see good fruit and a bad branch is thrown out. A good tree can't bear bad fruit but my sins have been bad over the years with the alcohol and countless character flaws. I'm sober now, but I feel ineffective and lukewarm.

-Will

 

[wmc1982]

Ok, so not trying to please man seems to be a way. I am very lonely and I know I can't be around unbelievers, but really I never had many real friends anyway. I still have the temptation for people to like me and I want that gone.

I've collected silver for 5+ years and decided to stop and use the money in better ways towards the Kingdom, but that sounds like I'm trying to buy my way in and I don't want to think that way.

I mean are my disabilities a part of suffering with Christ?

Should I be fasting more and reading more in some way to suffer?

One time someone asked if I was a Christian and I was scared but said yes. On my car before I wrecked it I had the fish symbol on the back when I lived with unbelievers (a huge mess).

I don't want to deny Christ or be ashamed. I'm just so shy it's hard for me to say what my favorite color is if the other person's is different! (well not that bad but I'm very scared of what people think of me and I want that gone).

So many since to repent of and I feel that it's all judgement, not with Christ. I can't sleep until God gives me wisdom on this tonight.

 

[orangeness365]

Hey,
I don't know if I have much advice for you, but you're not alone. I feel the same way. I have a mental illness too, and I feel so worthless. I can barely even drive a car. I'm not so much shy, I mean, sometimes I am and sometimes I'm not, but I'm a total coward. I barely watch sermons online, I do nothing to help anyone or spread the word, and most of my suffering just comes from my own failures and mental illness, not at the hands of other people. I was bullied growing up, a lot, but it wasn't for being a Christian, which makes me very sad. I think I'm mostly over the bullying, and I realize that I'm not perfect either, but I still live in the same hometown, so I remember high school a lot, because I still live there. I've thought about what you're saying too, about how if I get a job then maybe I could essentially buy my way to heaven through charity, and then thought, like you, that you can't buy your way into heaven. That doesn't mean not to give to charity though, it is still a good thing to do. Sometimes I wish I had enough guts to go preach the gospel in some country where doing so has the punishment of the death penalty, and then I wouldn't have to worry about anything anymore. I don't even bother spreading the word that much even on this website, because I often don't have the answers. I haven't done any good that wasn't at least partly selfish, and I have done a lot of mean things in my life without even meaning to. My family says to give myself a break since I have a major illness like you do, but I don't know, I still feel like I should have accomplished so much more. All I do is pray that I go to heaven every night, and hope that hell isn't too terrible, since I know I don't deserve heaven. All I can say from the Bible is that to those that are given much, much is expected. Just don't bury your coin in the sand and say it's because Jesus is a bad master, whatever that means. I think it means that if you have been given only a little, only a little bit more is expected of you, but if you say, rule the world, much more is expected of you. I think by being given a mental illness, probably less is expected of you, but there perhaps some things you can still go do? Don't look at me for an answer of what that is exactly, I barely am taking even 4 units this summer at college online and doing nothing else. But yeah, I think just not committing suicide is a good act, cuz I know that for people with bipolar that you have and schizophrenia that I have, that suicide is really common, so don't do it.

Luke 12:41-48
41Peter said, “Lord, are you telling this parable for us or for all?” 42And the Lord said, “Who then is the faithful and wise manager, whom his master will set over his household, to give them their portion of food at the proper time? 43Blessed is that servanti whom his master will find so doing when he comes. 44Truly, I say to you, he will set him over all his possessions. 45But if that servant says to himself, ‘My master is delayed in coming,’ and begins to beat the male and female servants, and to eat and drink and get drunk, 46the master of that servant will come on a day when he does not expect him and at an hour he does not know, and will cut him in pieces and put him with the unfaithful. 47And that servant who knew his master’s will but did not get ready or act according to his will, will receive a severe beating. 48But the one who did not know, and did what deserved a beating, will receive a light beating. Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required, and from him to whom they entrusted much, they will demand the more.

Matthew 25:14-30English Standard Version (ESV)
The Parable of the Talents
14 “For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servantsa]">[a] and entrusted to them his property. 15 To one he gave five talents,b]">[b] to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. 16 He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. 17 So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. 18 But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money. 19 Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. 20 And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here I have made five talents more.’ 21 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant.c]">[c] You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 22 And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here I have made two talents more.’ 23 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 24 He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, 25 so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here you have what is yours.’ 26 But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? 27 Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. 28 So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. 29 For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. 30 And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’

 

[LoricaLady]

If you are praying for the world, then your life is no way wasted. Here you are on a forum for prayers for persecuted believers, no doubt praying for some of them. What you are doing is more valuable that what many consider to be important in life.

It is true that when we get more and more into our walk with Messiah that we are way likely to suffer persecution of various kinds. To be honest, just because you aren't suffering persecution now, that doesn't mean you never will. If these are indeed the end times, for ex., then maybe some day you will be put to the test about your faith say in regard to the mark of the beast, Islam (some Bible scholars like Walid Shoebat, Joel Richardson and Armaggedon News people, say they are connected), whatever.

If Messiah feels you are ready and it is time to be tested, He will make sure that happens. You don't have to worry about that at all! In the meantime you can be getting closer and closer to Him so that whatever happens, good or bad, you are serving Him.

As far as being restricted in service due to being fairly housebound, well with the net you can reach out all over the globe. You could have a ministry in whatever area appeals to you. Letters to service people, or believing (gotta watch out there for cons) prisoners or persecuted believers can seem like a small thing to you but be gold to them.