.That said, I'm looking for attraction, which comes in different forms, beauty or a sense of modesty or peaceful look in a woman.
The bible refers to this as a gentle and quiet spirit. You'll find the passage in 1 Peter 3. In the natural that means a young lady with a pleasing disposition. She isn't argumentative, a drama queen or prone to upsets. She has a calming influence that's immediately felt within her presence. Cross reference the passage with Proverbs 31. They fit together and provide additional insight on the qualities most befitting for a bride.
The very next most important thing, a deal breaker, is her spiritual nature. My love language is peace. I'm attracted to this most in a woman. If she doesn't have it, I feel I must look elsewhere.
When peace is a requirement you must pay close attention to her discourse and interactions with others. How does she respond to disappointments, mistreatment, frustration and stress. Observe her listening skills, patience and restraint. You can't have a peaceful abode if you don't control your tongue.
Consider her upbringing. What was the environment like? Look at her parents, siblings and friends. They've had the most influence good or bad. How do they behave? Do you see the qualities you value in them? Because the ones who have her ear will be ones she turns to where you're concerned. Make sure they're advising her well.
How do you guys look for the "spiritual nature" of a woman?
You can't discern it from afar. You need time in her presence and lots of discourse and interactions. You have to see her in different scenarios to observe her response.
I believe marital preparation begins at home and starts with character, a personal relationship with God and a wholesome family ethos. I think parents have the primary responsibility for nurturing their personal amd spiritual growth and the church assists. It shouldn't be outsourced. You need to be hands-on.
If you want a daughter worth marrying you must embody the same and lead by example. Prayer is the linchpin for spiritual wellness and developing proficiency is a must. The wife must be equipped to address challenges and goals through offensive and defensive prayer. With attention given to fasting, study and worship in appropriate measures.
Service is a mainstay and should be an integral part of the home and practice and viewed holistically. It's more than volunteering or a position in the church. It's an expression of the heart and spirit made evident through her deeds. You don't want a busy body but someone who understands her work has meaning and her efforts honor you and the Lord.
It's a precursor for respect and admiration which inspire greater displays of gratitude, service and humility. And you needn't discuss submission at all or worry about its presence. You'll see the bend in her person and the expression is authentic. She's not playing a role.
It's helpful to know what she reads, views and how she spends her time. Whatever we feed will increase and you want to make sure she's eating from the right tree. That will be evident in her countenance and conversation.
It isn't difficult to find the right fit. It's challenging when you don't know who you are and why you're here. Your kingdom mission is the measuring stick. That's the person you need most of all and the one who will help you fulfill His intentions. If you use it as your barometer when meeting prospects you won't go astray.
~bella
