Help!

[praisegodnky]

mandy, i don't know what you are going through personally but i know about eating disorders and you have to get help. Please find an adult you can confide in if not your parents . you cannot carry this burden alone. it's okay to ask for help and there are others who have been where you are at. I will pray for you to have strength to tell an adult that will help you through this.
take care of yourself, no one else can do that but you
hugs

 

[Kirley]

hey mandy, firstly with the orange/blue envelopes, if u look at the bottom of the main page (where all the threads are listed) it will give u a key at wat each envelope means...

As for the ed thing..I know wat its like to have fights with ur best friend about ed. I went thru that too. i know he only wanted to help me but even if i did want help, at the same time i didnt.
Glad to hear ur doing well. Even if u dont see a doctor or neone, ask ur best friend to be able to keep a check on u to see how ur doing and to keep u accountable.

 

[mandy43]

hey everyone!!!

how is everyone doing? i hope everyone is good and healthy!

i am doing so well i cant even believe it!!! im now counting the days that i havent purged or starved myself!!! im so excited its been exactly 5 days with very little troubles... although i still have those thoughts they arent as bad i hardly think about it anymore and when i do i havent been acting on them.. God has really been working in me! i am living a healthier life!!! inside and out with Jesus and with food... niether are my enemy anymore!!! praise Jesus!!!

i guess when i first started posting here i was at my lowest point and with the help of Jesus, CF and everyone here i realize that i am better then my anorexia and my bulimia!!!

i will keep all posted

thanks a mill!!!
mandy!!!
xoxo

 

[meh]

I'm so glad to hear from you. And especially glad to hear you are doing so well. Five days is AWESOME!!!!

God bless you, mandy

 

[mandy43]

hey guys!

its me mandy again! things are going absolutley fantastic!!! believe me it feels sooooooo good... i think i am finally able to go out with my friends and be a teenager and eat with my friends... im on a spirtual high right now and a eating high i guess you could say!!! with Jesus being right there for me always i have kept up a good attitude and a GREAT eating program!

.....although sometimes i regret eating and i want to get the food out of me instead i just occupy myself by going for a bike ride getting some exserice i always have my friends to talk to ... i dont have to talk to them directly about my problem but in a way just talking can ease the pain.... and of course i have Jesus always.... and i have everyone here at CF!!!! thank you everyone!!!!


thanks for everything...
mandy
xo

 

[mandy43]

does anybody read this thread anymore... im just wondering...

 

[mandy43]

i have been having alot of ed thoughts lately... i dont know why! i havent acted upon them so far but im very scred that it may be around the corner!

i feel like im being so selfish!!!

i now use the site www.pale-reflections.com

i think i may stop using CF.... i just want to hide from it all... i want to hide from my ED, I want to hide from God... this wasnt supposed to happen to me!

mandy

.............if God has a plan for everything, then why am I like this? how can this be part of his plan?

is this all me?
is this my fault for being like this?

goodbye!

 

[meh]

Mandy, I'm sorry I missed a few of your posts. It's been stressful IRL for me for a few weeks. I hope you don't hide from God. We can't and we know that. What we can do, and what I hope you don't do, is stop asking Him for comfort, love and guidance. Please don't turn from Him in a time of need. That's when He most wants to help us.

We all love you here and you will continue to be in my prayers.

 

[Protinus]

Mandy: there are also I lot more people here that are concerned about you and that should be good to know. They may not write right away but they are thinking about you. It's OK to be mad about our Lord but you must know that He loves you and speaks to you in subtle ways. Open yourself up, be a little patient, He will speak to you!!

 

[mandy43]

im not trying to be a selfish or mean person... im really not that kind of person...

guess what goes up must come down...
-my moment of good thoughts and eating has now come down-
i know this is when i need God most but i want to hide from him b/c i know that i am doing something wrong...

im sorry...

im just so confused... at now its summer vacation... i am scraed its just an easier way for me to go back to my old habits... i dont see me friends as much... lieing is easier... i am alone more and i have time to think...

why do i have to take such a beautiful gift God has given us like food - and turn it into my enemy....

mandy

 

[Protinus]

im not trying to be a selfish or mean person... im really not that kind of person...

guess what goes up must come down...
-my moment of good thoughts and eating has now come down-
i know this is when i need God most but i want to hide from him b/c i know that i am doing something wrong...

im sorry...

im just so confused... at now its summer vacation... i am scraed its just an easier way for me to go back to my old habits... i dont see me friends as much... lieing is easier... i am alone more and i have time to think...

why do i have to take such a beautiful gift God has given us like food - and turn it into my enemy....

mandy

some things are not meant to be understood immediately. That does not sound helpful right now but you are working through some things that you do not understand about yourself. You also need advice from your family, counselors, friends and CF...please maintain this portal that will only help you. And it is also working your relationship out with our Lord. I am much older than you and I must tell you that I must keep the relationship alive every day with God...at least, this is what I have learned.

Work the advice that is given to you, don't put it on a shelf, hide from it, worry about not being able to carry it out because you think that "you don't measure up". I'm not saying that you do this but "work the advice given to you"...like building postive habits- it's hard to do at first, but if you make them routine, you won't have to think about it that much.

You are very loved Mandy...honor that by thinking about it more and using the advice that is given to you. We are here for you.

 

[meh]

im not trying to be a selfish or mean person... im really not that kind of person...

guess what goes up must come down...
-my moment of good thoughts and eating has now come down-
i know this is when i need God most but i want to hide from him b/c i know that i am doing something wrong...

im sorry...

im just so confused... at now its summer vacation... i am scraed its just an easier way for me to go back to my old habits... i dont see me friends as much... lieing is easier... i am alone more and i have time to think...

why do i have to take such a beautiful gift God has given us like food - and turn it into my enemy....

mandy

Hi, sweetie Of course you aren't selfish or mean. You are a warm and lovely person. God knows that. He also knows you are struggling. Don't let those feelings of shame keep you from taking your problems to Him or or us or anyone else. There is no shame in struggle.

 

[Araser]

amanda i will always be there for u.

 

[meh]

Mandy, this is just a note in case you come back to read that I'm thinking of you and you're in my prayers. I hope you're doing well.