help

[coolangel]

i have a 2 year old who has awful temper tantrums and she bite cause she got mad she screams i spank her yell try talking to her nothen works what do i do to calm her down

 

[Redguard]

I think I'm just a few months behind you... so I'd be interested in hearing what others have to say.

 

[andiesmama]

Wow! My daughter will be 2 1/2 next month....she doesn't have many temper tantrums, but is known to blow a fuse occasionally! I'll just tell you the things I've tried that have worked for me...

• Yes, I have swatted her bottom to get her attention in the middle of a tantrum, and it works!! But I have found yelling at her doesn't work, it just makes her madder....altho sometimes I can't help it! That's when I have to take a breath & just walk away, even if she's in the middle of one!
• Andie (my daughter) has bitten me only twice, and I both times I told her that she is never to bite anyone, ever! If she feels like biting someone, bite herself....so she did! And needless to say, she did NOT like the way it felt, so no more biting!
• If I see a meltdown beginning, I just pick her up (to get her to look & listen to me) and ask her if she's going to cry & be grumpy. If she says yes doh: ), I tell her she needs to go sit in her bed until she can be happy. Then we walk to her room, I put her in her bed, and leave, even if she's screaming. I think the ignoring thing works really well, it doesn't take very long & she comes out of her room telling me "Andrea is happy now" and it's over!
• And sometimes there's nothing you can do but to just let it happen & let them get over it. Make sure they are in a safe place (not like in the middle of a store or anything) & just let them cry & yell & scream while you go about your business (as much as you can! ). Pretty soon they'll get bored & stop all on their own.

That being said, I also try to find out what's going on when I see the tantrums start....if I see one coming on, I get down on her level & ask what the problem is/why she's frustrated/etc. I've found if I can get her to talk about it, we can fix the problem before it escalates into a full-blown tantrum!

Hope you didn't get bored reading all this! I just wanted to post some stuff that's worked for me in the past....but you'll just have to keep trying stuff until you find what works for your little one!! Good luck, you'll make it!!

Feel free to PM me if you need to talk!

 

[Redguard]

My daughter is 18 months. She's JUST recently started biting me... usually when I'm feeding her dinner and she doesn't like something. She's grab my hand and start biting.

Now... I play it cool and let her bite and show her that doing this has no effect on me. I'm still waiting to see the results and to see if she'll now be deterred from biting.

 

[andiesmama]

My daughter is 18 months. She's JUST recently started biting me... usually when I'm feeding her dinner and she doesn't like something. She's grab my hand and start biting.

Now... I play it cool and let her bite and show her that doing this has no effect on me. I'm still waiting to see the results and to see if she'll now be deterred from biting.

That's one way to get her point across!! I think it's a good idea, not to react at all.....that's what they're usually looking for, don't you think?

 

[Redguard]

Yup, some good ol' reverse-reverse-reverse psychology for her.

 

[Jenna]

We solved biting by making her bite her own arm after she bit one of us. When she didn't want to apply enough pressure, we would press up on her chin. That way she learned that her teeth really hurt. I'm sure that it sounds silly, but it worked, and fast.

 

[Kokopelli]

@coolangel

We have 20-month old that likes to throw tantrums at dinner. If she refuses to eat her meal, we take her out of the seat and set her on the floor. If she's being a real pistol, she gets a time out in the next room. My wife and I continue eating our meals. After a few minutes, Cassie comes back to the table and wants up in her seat. Most of the time, stuff like that works. Other times she needs a spanking, (something I hate even when she's really asking for it) but I have found the time outs away from every thing calms her down real fast.


@Redguard

AFAIK, biting at that age is normal. My 20-month old has won the nickname "Jaws" in her pre-school class for biting. We usually put Cassie in a time out when she bites, though she has won herself a spanking for it on a few occassions.

 

[coolangel]

thank u guys very helpful no andies mama didnt bore me and i will agan thanks looking foward to any other help anyone can give

 

[coolangel]

but i'm a single mom and so theres no guy around but i see she listens to guys more with the deeper voice thing

 

[Torah]

This is a very good seminary and I strongly suggest all to go to one
Institute in Basic Life Principles
Basic Seminar
What You Will Learn
Parenting/Family
· How the seeds of a wounded spirit grow into a crop of rebellion
· How to resolve common tensions between first-, second-, and third-born children
· Why children translate excess freedom as rejection
· Steps to follow when a loved one continues to rebel

http://www.iblp.org/iblp/