Help with someone who may be mentally ill...

[CounselorForChrist]

I made a topic here about my mother here that will give you more info:
http://www.christianforums.com/t7702791/

Does anyone have advice about the issue? My mothers father and her brothers and sisters all have rage issues and to some degree seem to be mentally ill in varied ways. But of course none of them admit it nor want help for it. They also all use the line of "I'm not as bad as <insert family member>!".

No matter what we say my mother flys into a rage (more so after some wine). WHen shes raging saying nothing makes her angry. But saying anything also makes her angry. She places blame and makes it out like the world is the problem and not her. And if it comes to talking about being a christian she will say you think your more holier then her.

Any advice would be great. Whether its a method to get her to help herself or a way to avoid conflict with her. I have tried talking to her with my dad and saying lets all go to counseling, but she says shes had help. Not to mention it makes her mad because she says we are not grateful if we think she needs help since she has gone through alot in life. >.<

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

Some of what you write about sounds almost like living with an alcoholic. Have you ever considered going to co-dependents anonymous? While it's not exactly the same, it might be a support group that would help you to better manage your emotions and get some words of insight into how to help your mom (if possible).

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Yeah I have tried asking her about getting help whether its through something like that or a doctor...anyone. But she usually has an excuse like:
"I only do this because of <insert reason>!" (placing the blame on someone else)
"I have stopped drinking as much!" (even though shes been saying that for months now)
"I don't need help, its not as bad as <insert person> who does it more!"

Even when it comes to my parents marriage, my mom is over controlling and angry. Where as my dad is nieve and beyond mellow. I told them they should have marriage counseling. But he doesn't want to see someone that might tell him he needs to get out of his comfort zone and she doesn't want to see someone who tells her she has anger issue and blame issues.

So nothing ends up happening. Regardless of this and the fact she swears at him (every name in the book) and will hit him, they do seem to get along at times. Maybe it because they realize no other person would do with them. At least thats my theory. In the end I am used to them, but I get nervous that when my fiance come and lives here with us (until we move) that she may be scared off by them.

Which isn't the end of the world because I can move with her back to the Philippines. But still I don't them leaving a negative taste in her mouth.