Help! Sexless Marriage

[DianaG]

Hi all, I am looking some help/advice, I have been a Christian for 8 years and waited for the right guy to get married to, so I got married just over 2 yrs ago and due to circumstances beyond our control we have yet to 'consumate the marriage' as the saying goes. My husband has been a type 1 diabetic since he was a child, my husband has erectile dysfunction which is very common among diabetics, long story short, any medication he has gotten from the docs to try and treat this has failed, we try roughly once or twice a month and each time he takes the meds, nothing works, we both would like children, I am 36 and he is 47, after 2 and a half years of trying to be as patient as I can, the realisation of a permenant sexless marriage and possibly never being able to have children I feel so disappointed, we both waited so long to find godly spouses to find we have been met with such problems (along with these issues, his father died 6 months after we married, 6 months later I got sick with meningitis, 5 days after I got better, a drunk driver hit us and due to his injuries he hasn't been able to work since, also he moved from the States to here in Northern Ireland and is currently waiting on a provisional license, as they only allow a year allowance on an american license before you have to sit a uk driving test). At this point I want to schedule at appointment at the docs for us both to go and discuss what next we can do. We pray about these issues. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Blade]

DianaG ALL things are possible to then in Christ Jesus. I only share what I know. You both together pray tell HIM what you want and need. He said.. if you know He (GOD) hears you then you know you have the petitions/prayers you asked for. Gods will is His word. And I will be praying and He said "Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven."

Some thing EACH of us need to know is.. Can God/Jesus/Holy Spirit ever lie? Then we agree and others will and it will be done for them by our Father in heaven. Not being nice. He can't lie.. if you just think you've said something done something wrong.. just repent and keep going. Walk by faith. No matter WHAT it looks like.. don't be moved. No matter how dark.. dont be moved..fear steps in..say HIS word.. NO! God has not given me the spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind.

Going to be ok! In JESUS name. As Peter and John said.. you look at us as if we did this by our own power. Its FAITH IN THAT NAME! JESUS

 

[Dave G.]

You guys might have to get creative outside of the erection. A man can [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] and can [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] without an erection. And a woman can get pregnant from [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] just at or just barely inside the opening ( sorry graphic I know but it is what it is). But it's going to take some sexy creativity, love, a lot of touching each other. Let your imaginations go and if you get him hot enough well hey nuff said, maybe it will be more than a shot in the dark so to speak..

Worse though if he is beat down emotionally too. And if he can't work can you guys support a child if one is born to you.

And of course I agree with prayer mentioned above.

 

[Kris Jordan]

Hi all, I am looking some help/advice, I have been a Christian for 8 years and waited for the right guy to get married to, so I got married just over 2 yrs ago and due to circumstances beyond our control we have yet to 'consumate the marriage' as the saying goes. My husband has been a type 1 diabetic since he was a child, my husband has erectile dysfunction which is very common among diabetics, long story short, any medication he has gotten from the docs to try and treat this has failed, we try roughly once or twice a month and each time he takes the meds, nothing works, we both would like children, I am 36 and he is 47, after 2 and a half years of trying to be as patient as I can, the realisation of a permenant sexless marriage and possibly never being able to have children I feel so disappointed, we both waited so long to find godly spouses to find we have been met with such problems (along with these issues, his father died 6 months after we married, 6 months later I got sick with meningitis, 5 days after I got better, a drunk driver hit us and due to his injuries he hasn't been able to work since, also he moved from the States to here in Northern Ireland and is currently waiting on a provisional license, as they only allow a year allowance on an american license before you have to sit a uk driving test). At this point I want to schedule at appointment at the docs for us both to go and discuss what next we can do. We pray about these issues. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated.

Hi DianaG,

I am sorry you guys have been struggling so much in so many areas over so many things.

After reading all you posted, I wasn't sure if your struggle was primarily over the fact that your "sexless marriage" is prohibiting you both from conceiving...or if it is because you are unfulfilled sexually because of the impotency...or both.

If you are mainly concerned about having children, I think it would be wise to consult a doctor about that because I would think modern medicine could offer some solutions to that dilemma.

If you are mainly concerned about not being sexually satisfied due to the lack of sexual intercourse, there are other ways to bring sexual fulfillment to your marriage. So is that the primary struggle you are having?

 

[Deidre32]

Maybe find a good marriage/sex therapist, to help improve this area of your marriage? The challenge though, is to find one who is also Christian, otherwise you might be offered ''advice'' that is immoral...ie: add porn to your sexual routine, etc...

Praying for you both.

 

[joshua 1 9]

And a woman can get pregnant

There maybe a very narrow window of opportunity. My wife has friends that were testing themselves so they know when they were most futile and they were able to get pregnant. I think they have apps for this also if a women wants to get pregnant or if she wants to avoid getting pregnant.