heart-broken

[littletomatoes]

Hi everyone,

I have been in a relationship which many church leaders and a prophet told me was a god-given partner. I envisioned my life with this man and never doubted that we would get married and spend the rest of our lives together.

But after four long years we broke up. (He broke up with me, he is christian too although not very devout). It is getting harder and harder day by day to get through this. Since we just moved into an apt together I have to live with him as my roommate. Is it normal to have such an unbearable pain? God has promised me we will be back together but after all this time, our distance had grown, and I see no hope for a reconcilation. I am starting to lose my usually strong faith.

And on top of that, I am struggling with depression. Does anyone have any tips for an extremely hard break-up? (not the usual go out more, keep busy, etc etc which we've all heard before)

thanks so much, god bless.

 

[okiemommy26]

Are you sure God told you that you both would get back together? I mean sometimes we think He tells us stuff and it turns out it was just our heart wanting it and not us totally listening to His will.

I do not know what to tell about depression except go to a counsler if you have not tried that already. If I were you it would be best to try to move out but I doubt you can do that huh? It would be very hard to get out that depression with him being there seeing him all the time.

I will pray for you.

 

[littletomatoes]

Thanks for the tip, I'll try it out.

 

[tinafromboise]

Don't come crying to us about it.

 

[BrBob]

#1 - Move out. Christians of the opposite sex have no business living together. Living in the same house also clouds your vision. You will continue to have difficulty hearing from God while you are together like that, not because it's a sin, but because he is there all the time and the desire of your heart is for him right now. The Lord may have another man for you that you can't see right now because of your clouded vision.

God Bless you.
Bob
Spearfish, SD

 

[bobbyblackwell]

find another man.

 

[littletomatoes]

I have actually considered moving out, but right now the expenses are just too high. I put down almost $2000 for my share of deposite and first and last month rent, and as a poor student, I just cannot afford to do that all over again. But more importantly, I just don't have the time or energy anymore to move yet once again (as most of you know, it is a very time-consuming and stressful affair).

So for right now I'm just hanging in here and taking vitamins to calm my mood and hope everything works out for the best in the will of God. God bless you guys!

 

[Autumnleaf]

I have actually considered moving out, but right now the expenses are just too high. I put down almost $2000 for my share of deposite and first and last month rent, and as a poor student, I just cannot afford to do that all over again. But more importantly, I just don't have the time or energy anymore to move yet once again (as most of you know, it is a very time-consuming and stressful affair).

So for right now I'm just hanging in here and taking vitamins to calm my mood and hope everything works out for the best in the will of God. God bless you guys!

I know you don't feel like you can, but if you could move back home and heal up. Get away from all the unwholesome memories you immerse yourself in by staying there. They can damage your soul. You learned a lesson about moving in with a man you'd like to marry. Its bad juju. Your church leaders should have seen this problem coming a mile away if they knew you two were going to move in together before marriage.

 

[InTheFlame]

I have been in a relationship which many church leaders and a prophet told me was a god-given partner.

I had one of these relationships once. Then we broke up... and man, was I confused.

First - I firmly believe that as people who can make choices between good and evil, we can ruin a gift given to us by God. There are few gifts which we can't throw away.

Second - in my case, we did finish up re-uniting. We're married now. But it was nine long, eventful years later. We both had to do a lot of growing before we were ready for a proper relationship.

So... I guess what I'm saying is, don't hold your breath. IF the two of you get back together sometime in the future, it should be after you've worked out the personal problems that tore you apart originally. In the meantime, make sure you have friends around you. You need support and encouragement and love and hugs. You've got a God who loves you and wants to comfort you through this tough time - lean on him. Don't be afraid to be honest with him. It's not like he'll strike you down for saying, "Lord, I'm angry and I don't understand!" Ask him for help.

Longterm, focus on becoming the person He made you to be. Focus on growing the fruits of the spirit. Learn about Godly relationships (the Boundaries books - by Drs Cloud and Townsend - are a good start).

 

[cjba]

I'm sorry you are going through this. I understand more than you know. I have been married for 21 years and the last couple of months we were living as you called it "roommates".

Keep your head strong and don't let anyone convince you that you are not worth loving. You a child of
God and precious to him.

My husband is gone as of this past Friday. It is harder to live as a roommate that to be away from the person you love. At least when you are away from the person you do not have the constand rejection which can get to your self esteem. You need to love yourself more than you love him.

If you ever need someone to talk to send me a pm.

God Bless