Group Effort; Something by Joy Everlasting and Jelly Bean

[Joy_Everlasting]

Joy dropped another X, forming a diagonal. It didn't count though, since Stellar's O was in the middle. Why is she laughing? Joy laughed too, just in case it was part of playing tic tac toe. But then her eyes were caught by Stellar's book. After a second of staring, Joy burst out in stereotypical cheerleader-speak. "Omigosh! You have that book too? I've read it like a thousand times! Isn't it like the most amazing thing ever? Can I see it? It looks like a first edition!" Joy hoped she'd be able to find some winning strategy in those 600 way to win.

((I don't know. It would be fun either way. *is indecisive*))

 

[jelly_bean]

((Well.... *is indecisive also* I'm going to.... you'll see! ))

Stellar beamed at Joy's foolish move, and proceeded to place an O in a diagonal move. "Yooh're doomed now! Go ahead and look at book. Yooh won't find anything to help you now! Ha! Ha ha! Loohser!"

O|_|X
_|O|_
X|_|_

((Do you see it, Joy? )

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

((No fair! Now I have to decide! ))

Joy stared indecisively at the board; she could see that she would have to block Stellar's attack, but what about her own plan? It took a couple of seconds for her to realize that a) she had no plan, and b) if she had, blocking Stellar's move would have been how to put it into action. So she dropped another X in the last available corner, leaving Stellar to see the trap, and glare at everything within sight, especially the book that hadn't helped her a bit.

A couple seconds later, the game was finished, and Joy was triumphantly asking a very frustrated Stellar which "indoctrination room" Jelly was in. "Is Jelly- Er, I mean, Miss Geneva, my long lost cousin, in her usual room?" she asked happily, not noticing the look she received from Ms. Pursun after her mistake.
"Of cohurse," was the cold I'm-sure-you-cheated reply that Stellar gave, before leading her down the hall to Jelly's cell.

 

[jelly_bean]

((And wasn't it a great decision? )) After Stellar deposited Joy with Geneva (with no little amount of glowering and cold-shouldering) Geneva raced over to her friend. "You came! You saved me from the--" Before she could finish her sentence, the music started up again, even louder than before if that was possible. "Umm... never mind that. YOU CAME!" She shouted, grabbing Joy and shaking her. Looking around as any prisoner would when doing something sneaky, she whispered loudly and hurriedly, "Did you bring the stuff? Do you know where Spike is? How he's doing? I don't think I'll be able to get out of here... not today, at any rate. Maybe I can win my way out of here early, but I need more time than Spike has. Do you have any plans on snatching him from the clutches of the Empress of China?"

Stellar, meanwhile, was pondering about the weird girl who had scammed her way to a win. There is something odd about her. But what?

 

[jelly_bean]

Meanwhile... awaiting for the real life Joy Maloy to post, jelly_bean will engage in the story behind the Empress of China.

The Empress of China, holding his bandaged hand, sat on his throne as he plotted his next moves. His hand was bandaged because he had tried stroking Spike, like all regal people stroke their pets, and was paying the consequences. Spike also sported a bandaged from the wound he'd received when the Empress had kicked over the spot for poking him.

The Empress of China's palace was undergoing renovations, as the palace was actually an abandoned warehouse next to the Cucumber Complex. (Named after the troubled young man who committed suicide over tic tac toe) Several volunteers were now helping do the demolition, to get ready for the new building.

The unfortunate fact about the Empress of China was that he had only become the Empress of China due to the soap opera episode Joy and Jelly had acted out back at Stuff Mart. That was why Jelly had not known about him. Anyway, his real name is Clark Wendell, the eighth child of two very tired parents, Ruthanne and Tim Wendell. The other seven children were all girls, and their names are(in order of birth) Sara, Mara, Cara, Tara, Lara, Zara and Jara. He had been living in the Wendell family ranch house with all his siblings and parents, surprisingly enough as some of his older sisters were married. He had done his part to keep the family income coming by working full-time at Stuff Mart. He had been a member of the Sixth Street Tic Tac Toe Club and he listened to alternative music.

Growing up with seven sisters had been hard. This was why he had now embraced what he felt was his true identity: the Empress of China.

Basically, it was Geneva and Joy's fault he was as he is now and that Jelly is in jail. It's rather fitting.

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

"Jelly!" Joy's greeting was almost as loud as necessary to be heard over the blasting music. She wrinkled her nose as she heard the tic tac toe music. That music always gave Joy a shoulder-ache, though she wasn't sure why.
"Oh yeah! I've got the stuff." She hand over the tic tac toe board with the secret compartment. "But I don't know about Spike; from what I saw, he's still with the evil Empress of China. I don't know what to do! This won't be a normal operation; we're talking about royalty. He could put me in here with you, and then Spike would be lost forever!" Joy got tears in her eyes at the horrible thought, not of Spike being lost forever, but of someone destroying all inflatable pool toys. Not that that had anything to do with what was happening, but it was still a depressing thought on top of an already depressing situation.

"You think you'll be stuck here for long? That lady that's running this place seems prett mean. And she's completely obsessed with tic tac toe too! Are you sure you'll be okay with her around?" Joy was starting to panic slightly, because of everything that was going wrong.

 

[jelly_bean]

"No, he won't." Geneva said firmly, trying to sound confident but instead sounding like she was about to be sick. "You're the King of Australia, I think, anyway. He won't jeopardize relations that important... why not get a plastic cactus and switch them out? He'd never be able to tell the difference. He is a guy, after all." Geneva suggested.

"Joy, I have no idea how long I'm going to be stuck in here. Calling his advisor a name such as Spike really offended him. Once Spike is safe, however, I WILL figure my way out of here, even if I have to pose as the Grand Duke of Turkey." Jelly said. "Don't worry about me and Stellar. Now that I have earplugs and sudoku, I can outlast anything. I mean, the food is good and I've never lost a game yet to her. What more can I want?"

((Famous last words? ))

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

"Oh, yeah..." Joy said thoughtfully. "I'd forgotten about my royal heritage. You wouldn't happen to be royalty too? Because then he'd have to let you out. I'll have to check; you might be supreme dictator of Rhode Island!" She paused thoughtfully, trying her best to ignore the music while Jelly talked. "Switch Spike for a plastic cactus?" It really wasn't a bad idea, except for one thing: "But if I disguise the fake one well enough, I might accidently take that one instead of Spike." The idea was terrible, but probable; Joy may have been a girl, but underneath all the hairdye, she was a blonde girl. resulting in forgetfulness.

"Well, I don't see why he should be offended; Spike's a perfectly good name," Joy declared, before continuing, "But don't worry; I'll save Spike as soon as possible, and then we can plan your escape together. It won't be too long until you're free." At least, she hoped so; Jelly and Joy had the advantage of knowing more about the indoctrination building than almost anyone else, but The Empress of China and Stellar (and her book) could possibly even the odds.

Joy's mind wandered for a moment, during which she was in Italy creating the Leaning Tower of Pisa, before she returned to the task at hand. "And I'll bring you more sudoku books as often as I can, I promise." Her minded wandered away again when the tower fell down. It was a majestic sight, though only in her mind. "Oh shoot..." she muttered. "I'm not a very good architect."

 

[jelly_bean]

"I am the supreme dictator of Rhode Island," Geneva whispered, "but the unfortunate thing is, I haven't taken over yet!" Of course, that statement couldn't be heard over the loud music blaring from the speakers right behind the pair. Her face fell as Joy pointed out the flaw of the plastic cactus plan. (Say that three times fast!) She knew her friend well enough to know that such was a real problem to consider.

Geneva was very worried about what was going to happen, as her fate DID rest in the hands of the sometimes-very-capable Joy Maloy. The thought of playing sudoku soothed her a bit, but ten hours of playing tic tac toe per day was nothing to look forward to.

"Well, being an architect doesn't matter... escaping, for Spike and I both, is what matters!" She exclaimed, before remembering Stellar. Stellar was singing along with the music in German, completely oblivious to the scheming duo. "So you should get going. Who knows what may happen to Spike if we wait too long!"

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

"You are? But you haven't gotten a make over?" Joy was restating what Jelly had said in an incredulously loud format as she tried to figure out how that would help. "What's a makeover have to do with ruling an island?" The music really was annoying, more so because it repeated constantly, and Joy already knew every word and pause from times she'd spent at the Center.

"I could take him a real cactus, and write something on the bottom, so I'd know it wasn't Spike!" Joy exclaimed, before remembering how cruel that would be to the other cactus. "Never mind. But I'll come up with something, even if it involves telling the Empress that Spike betrayed him, and is only fit for the likes of you and me!"

"True, unless I could design a way to get you out of here, but I don't think that'll be very hard: I'll just forge the Empress's signature and write an order for your release! Or I could dig under the building, but that would ruin your room." Half or more of what Joy was saying couldn't be heard over the music, but she was quite sure that her plans might work. "I'll get to work on it right away!" she shouted.

And with that, she walked out of the room, or would've if the door hadn't been locked. "Mrs. PURSUN!!!!" she shouted, jiggling the door knob, and trying to be loud enough for the Germantown (right?) guard to hear her. "I'm done visiting my long lost Jelly-cousin! Can I come out now?"

 

[jelly_bean]

"All vight, all vight! Qvit shouting and come out!" Stellar commanded, opening the door for Joy. Geneva was already looking bored in the background, drawing Xs and Os onto the wall with a blue crayon. As Stellar escorted Joy out, things elsewhere were cooking at full steam ahead...

"Advisor!" Barked Clark Wendell, aka the Empress. "What are your thoughts on waging war with the mayor for supreme control of this country, eh, city?" Spike mutely gave the barests of shrugs. "Speak up, man!"
"Clark, would you quit talking to the cactus? You're creeping me out!" Grumbled his oldest sister Sara.
"Such insubordination will not be tolerated!" He mumbled under his breath.
"MOOOOOOOM, Clark's playing Empress AGAIN. Tell him to grow up!"
"Clark, dear," came his mother's voice from their kitchen "I do wish you would stop pretending to be the Empress of... um... wherever it is you're Empress. Didn't your father speak to you about that?"
He had, but, all he had said was,
"Son, there's something we... uh... you see, your mother and I... you can't be, the, ah... oh! The game's on. See you later, Son."
"Yeah, Mom." He evaded, picking up Spike. "Well, I've got to go. See you later."
"Go where?" He heard, as he shut the door behind him.

"We need a new empire. My house just isn't working." Clark said with a frown. "Maybe I should go set up shop... at the coffee shop! Yes! Let's go, advisor!"

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

"Thank you, your German-ness. I had a wonderful time visiting my long lost aunt. And I think you've successfully insubordinated her, so you should let her go soon. Have a wonderful day." And with that, and a wave at Jelly, since the music was too loud to say goodbye, Joy skipped out of the Indoctrination Center. Find Spike, free him, Free Jelly too. Find Spike, free him, free Jelly too. Find a waffle iron, make blue waffles... I mean, find Spike, free him and Jelly... Jelly donuts!

In the ten minute walke home, Joy managed to forget what she needed to do four times, and disrupt three games of tic tac toe. Thankfully, she remembered what she really needed to do when she opened the door to her apartment, and promptly wrote it on her hand with a bright orange permanent marker. Then, frequently checking her hand, she went to dig through her pile of new shopping-spree stuff. Suprisingly enough (or not surprisingly, since this story is full of unbelievable coincidences) she found an inflatable cactus in the mound of markers, and other random things that had been knocked off the display, into her cart. She immediately inflated it, set it in one of her old flower pots and scribbled over the random marker drawings that were all over the pot with a permanent marker that kind of matched the pot's original color. Once that was finished, she carefully wrote "Not Spike" on the bottom, just in case, and threw some dirt from her backyard into the pot.

Then it was time for her disguise, which end up involving a black wig, two fake mustaches for eyebrows, a black poddle skirt, and a bright yellow t-shirt with a smiley face on it. The result looked suspisciously like a bumblebee with a unibrow. Not that Joy cared; she grabbed "Not-Spike" as she'd begun calling the fake cactus, and dashed out the door, narrowly avoiding a collision with an angry tic tac toe-er who was saying something about her cruel vandalism of his board (she'd added nine more squares, making it a Connect Four board) and slid down the stair rail, which only ever works in stories, since stair rails are usually too close to the wall. All in all, it was a very productive hour. Now all she had to do was find the Empress. That, on the other hand, ended up taking another twenty minutes, since she didn't really think he'd invade the coffee shop that was known for being used by the King of Australia.

 

[jelly_bean]

The Empress was drinking his fifth cup of coffee by the time Joy entered, which was odd because he'd only been there about half an hour. This was explained by four nearly full cups of coffee crowded next to Spike. At any rate, he was deep in discussion with Spike... about flowers.
"Which are the most trustworthy, would you say? Daisies, daffodils? What is your opinion of sunflowers? ...Oh? Very suspicious breed? I see, I see."
During this discourse, he had an audience. An audience of one, who was there because it was convenient for the author. The person watching the Empress was a distant cousin of Jelly's, her name was Lemon, and she was not Asian. With bleached white hair, she looked odd to say the least, but what was even stranger was the stuffed turtle sitting next to her.

She was taking notes for her botany class, and she took a great interest in Spike, who looked a lot like her distant cousin Jelly's Spike. Spotting Joy, she gave her a wave, not that Joy knew Lemon. Well, Joy knew Lemon, but Lemon came sporadically (usually when Geneva was locked up) and wasn't a main character in the story, so whether Joy remembered her or not wasn't clear. Anyway, for the moment, Joy, King of Australia was unnoticed to the distracted Empress of China.

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

Joy was having her own conversation with Not-Spike when she entered the coffee shop. It alternated between despair of ever recuing Spike, and laughter at his comments about how her wig wasn't really helping hide her blue hair. She waved at Lemon, almost dropping the fake cactus in the proccess, before she actually noticed the Empress and Spike.

"You're here! I was getting so worri- I mean..." She paused, straightening her wig and eyebrows (for dramatic effect, of course; it always helps to draw out the suspense of a situation) "Your super empressness, I'm afraid I have some terrible news for you. That cactus has been impersonating your true cactus friend-thing, who I found lost on the sidewalk only a little while ago. Can I please take the bad one away now, and leave you with this one? Thanks." And she started reaching for Spike, hoping that her speed would prevent the Empress from grabbing Spike first, and that she wouldn't forget which cactus was which. Of course (for further dramatic effect, and lengthening purposes) she did forget, and Joy froze glancing back and forth between the two cactuses, as confused as if they'd been identical. "Oops."

 

[jelly_bean]

The Empress was dumbstruck. Or at least it appeared so, because his jaw had slackened and he was not saying anything. "They... how did you... I never... they look the same!" He gasped, swiveling his head from one cactus to another. "It's startling! Which one is which, again? Take the impersonator away, immediately!" Clark commanded, trying to find some way to tell the two apart. "Err... did I have the impersonator, or did you have him?"

Lemon noticed the hubbub and wandered over with her stuffed turtle. "Hey, I heard you and I was wondering, do you need some help?" She asked helpfully. "I'm a botanist. I can tell plants apart and stuff. Are you looking for the cactus that isn't Spike? Look, this is it." She said, holding up Spike. "This looks completely different from the Spike my cousin Jelly has. So this is definitely an impersonator. You can tell just by looking at it... doesn't it look all plasticky and fake? And that bud. Everyone knows Spike is a boy cactus, he would never let his manly plant-self sprout a flower." Lemon explained with no hesitation.

Now, one might think Lemon caught on to what Joy was trying to pull and cleverly ousted Spike from his precarious situation. But in Watercress Heights, one never knows if someone was truly being smart or just being extremely stupid.

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

Joy didn't know what she would've done if Lemon hadn't walked over right then; she couldn't remember whether or not Lemon was really a botanist, but any help was better than none. "Uh... Yeah, what she said." Joy declared indecisively. If it wasn't Spike... She could figure out a new plan, hopefully.

"So if you'll just excuse me, Mister Empress, I'm going to take this cactus away so he can't do whatever terrible thing he was doing before I revealed his true identity." I said he was doing something bad, didn't I? I might have... Just then she looked at Lemon. I think I want some lemonade... A big glass full of it. Yellow lemonade, not pink. Pink is good, but yellow is always better. Now what was I doing here again? It's not time for my morning coffee and latte. She glanced back at the Empress's table. Oh yeah...

And snatching up Spike, or the cactus she hoped was Spike, Joy dashed out of the store as quickly as she could while still walking and thinking about a lemonade stnad in the desert with cacti providing shade. And a snake charmer playing an oboe without a snake... Weird.

 

[jelly_bean]

The Empress was so confused, he hardly said a word as Joy Maloy made her calm escape. Lemon pursed her lips as she studied the left behind cactus. "She wanted the real cactus, right?" She said to herself, although the Empress responded as if she was speaking to him.

"No! She wanted the fake! Why? Which one is this?" He cried, looking panicked.
"That's the real one." Lemon replied smoothly, in a tone that bespoke her wide botanary wisdom. Unfortunately, this time Lemon was correct. The real one still remained in the same spot he had been in since the beginning of the episode.

Lemon, having no clue what was going on, simply took a seat next to the Empress and began fingering Spike's pot. "You know," she began, "this cactus looks awfully... strange. Is he all right?"
"Why, of course! I've been feeding him two scrumptious meals a day..."

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

"Haha! I did it. I had no idea it was going to be that easy to get Spike back, even though there was one moment in there, well, you know what I mean; I was tense." Because Jelly was absent, Joy was talking to Not-Spike while she skipped home, reveling in her victory. "But I don't think he even had a clue. The inflatable one was just like the other; I could barely tell the difference." Then the inflatable cactus hit a pointy tree branch that happened to be in the way, and uncerimoniously, started deflating. "Spike's deflating, call a doctor! Someone please!" And then she saw the sharpie-etched letters on the bottom of the siftly flattening cactus's pot "Not-Spike." Joy's eyes widened, and she clutched at Not-Spike, as she realized her mistake. "Sweet Celery, I left Spike there!"

Thirty minutes of self-lecturing later, she marched out of her bedroom, which she had marched into ten minutes before, to show her disdain for the cowardly deflated cactus. This time, Joy was dressed in full medical garb. Or whatever medical garb she had; a toy stethoscope, a white lab coat, a headband-thing, and a magnifying glass, with a short, black, curly wig to complete the image. "This time, there aren't going to be any Spike clones, so I don't get confused," she firmly told herself before rushing out the door.

"Mister Empress, you cactus is very sick!" she shouted upon breathlessly re-entering the cafe.

 

[jelly_bean]

((Mister Empress ))

"He... he is?" The Empress sputtered, glancing at Spike. "What are you talking about? He looks fine! What's wrong with him? Who are you? I demand an answer!" He barked, although he looked slightly worried, as well. He shot a look at his new companion Lemon, who simply looked hooked on the 'doctor's' every last word.

"Yosh!" Geneva whispered as she applied the last bit of makeup to her face. She had drawn X's and O's all over her face and exposed skin. Grimacing at having the horrid symbols all over her, she shouted, "Miss Purson! Miss Purson! Come quick! I think I'm dying! Help, help! My antictactoe is flaring up something horrible! Oh, the pain! The agony! The ignomy! The economy!"

Stellar came rushing in at the evident distress in the prisoner's voice. "What is it, Jell--AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! You're.... you're covered in tic tac toes!" She shrieked. "What should I do? I don't know anything about antictactoe! Oh, Jelly! What can I do? How do I help you?"

"You must release me immediately!" Jelly stated clearly, before taking on her agitated look again. "I need to go see my long lost relative, who has the antidote to my terrible condition! Please! Time is of the essence! If I remain in tic tac toe headquarters for too much longer, I... will... turn into a tic tac toe board!" She wailed, turning her face away to sob loudly.

"Ja, ja!" Stellar consoled her, opening the cell door. "I'm not a runner, or I would accompany you and make sure you are all right. But go! Go to your long lost relative before it's too late!" Stellar pleaded, pushing Jelly out of the center. "HURRY!" Jelly heard as she sprinted off, the word echoing off the surrounding building walls. "HURry! Hurry! Hurry..."

 

[Joy_Everlasting]

((Posting for old time's sake... Or just because I miss this story, and I have time for a brief moment. ))

"Um... He's... Well, can't you see?" Joy shouted, in a slow dramatic way that gave her time to think of a solution. "He's red-ish, and his spikes are quivering." She stuck the ear-things of the toy stethoscope around Spike and pushed the cold, metal part against her ears, with an attempt at a concerned expression on her face. "It's just as I thought. Your advisor is having a heart attack! I'll need to operate, but there he'll have to stay at my Hospital for Ruler's Advisors for at least a year, probably twenty-two." She paused for a second, trying to remember why she needed to get Spike away from the Empress and whether or not there was any rush. She couldn't remember but if there was supposed to be a rush, she would need to hurry. "And if I don't get him to my hospital soon, he'll become a dandelion and die within 6.573 hours."

The thought of Spike dying, even though he wasn't going to, as far as she knew, brought tears to Joy's eyes. "It would be very sad." And then her stretched attention span collapsed and she started crying for all the poor balloons that had been lost in space, never to find a home on earth again. "I'd hate to see that happen to anything or anyone." She was talking about the balloons, not Spike, but it would have been bad for him to be lost in space too. After a few moments, her thoughts of balloons in space led her to thoughts of balloons on earth, which led her to thoughts of a poor balloon getting caught on a cactus and popping and- "Oh right! I really need to take him now!"