Golfing Jokes

[corbem]

A golfer was addressing his ball, getting ready to shoot. As he was about ready to hit, a voice came over the p.a. system. "Will the gentleman on the ladies tee please move back to the men's tee".
He looked up and then resumed addressing the ball again. The voice
again- "Will the Man on the Red tees move back to the White Tees"!!
He looked back at the starters shack and said, "Will the man on the p.a. shut up so that the man on the ladies tee can hit his second shot".

 

[carine]

.

 

[servant4ever]

lol, that has happened to my dad before while in a tournament on the first hole with a ton of people watching (4-500)... except there was no PA telling him not to hit there

servant4ever

 

[Miss Mayberry]

Good one!

.

The ladies' tee is usually no more than 75-100 yards away from the mens' tee. The man on the ladies' tee hadn't hit his ball very far. Only 75-100 yards.

 

[corbem]

Jesus and God decide to go and have a game of golf and so spend all morning going around a course when they come to the 15th hole.
Jesus coms up against a rather difficult shot and so is advised by God to play it safe and use his pitching wedge but Jesus says "No, no, I've seen Tiger woods do this exact same shot with a nine iron and get it onto the green. If he can do it then so can I". And so jesus takes the shot and *SPLASH* straight into the water hazard. With a sigh god parts the water and allows Jesus to go retrieve his ball and take the shot again.

"Now this time I do suggest you use the pitching wood and go for the safety shot" says God, but once again Jesus replies "I've seen Tiger woods take exact same shot with a nine iron, trust me I know what i did wrong last time"...He takes the shot and *SPLASH* he's in the water hazard again.

With a sigh God parts the water for Jesus to regain his ball and retake the shot. "Now this time please follow my advice and take the safety shot" says God. "No no" replies Jesus a third time"I have seen Tiger woods do this exact same shot with a nine iron, I can get this straight onto the green from here trust me". "Fine" says God" but this time don't expect me to help you retrieve your ball when it ends up in the water hazard".

Of course the inevitable happens and the ball ends up back in the water hazard for a third time with that heart wrenching *SPLASH* and so Jesus steps out onto the water and walks along the surface looking for his ball.

At this point a shocked passing golfer notices this man walking on top of the water and turns to God saying "who does he think he is? Jesus?"

 

[vinki]

I will enter a joke similar to your page yet just as funny. O.K !!!!!