Goldilocks and the three Candidates

[PacificPandeist]

Once upon a time, Goldilocks was skipping through the town when she saw an election going on.... having recently turned 18 and registered to vote, she decided to check out the candidates for President....

She looked at the first candidate and said "this one's too young, and inexperienced to be President"....

She looked at the second one and said "this one's waaaay too old and has had too much cancer to be President"....

She looked at the third one, under sixty years old, but with over twenty years of experience in public service including service in the CIA, as a US Attorney, and in Congress, and said "this one's juuuust right"....

Then she looked at the platforms of the three candidates....

She looked at the first candidate and said "this one says he wants to get us out of the War, but he also wants to jack up our taxes and expand government a whole lot"....

She looked at the second one and said "this one wants to cut some taxes, but wants to stay in this War for a hundred years, plus get us into a bunch of other wars that won't make us safer and that we can't afford, and hey, he also wants to expand government a whole lot"....

And then she looked at the third one and said, "this one wants to get us out of the War, and keep us out of other wars, and he wants to cut taxes a whole bunch too!!"

But then some brainwashed hack came up and said, "you have to vote for one of the first two, cause even though they both suck, voting for the third candidate is throwing your vote away, and besides we're trying to kick him off the ballot anyway, because.... uh, because uh...." but Goldilocks didn't need to hear anymore to know that the hack was indeed totally brainwashed and had bought into a broken system....

 

[Staccato]

...And then the reality bear came in and said "but maybe what the third candidate is offering isn't what people want. Not everything rests on policies and age, Goldilocks".

Goldilocks pondered for a minute "Well...I want to vote for the third candidate anyway"

"That's your choice" said the reality bear "but not everyone thinks like you do Goldilocks. What about the potentiality of a cross-partisan bind in Congress against this third choice? I'm afraid that the reality bear must be pragmatic, as well as idealist"

"But that's the brainwashed hack keeps telling me..."

"Then don't listen to him Goldilocks" snapped the reality bear, cutting across her, "Democracy is the right to choose the most unpopular candidate. You can choose who you wish, just as I will choose mine. Your candidate has youthful vigour, experience and a whole host of good qualities, but I still won't choose him".

"Why"? asked Goldilocks, looking shocked, "Surely if you think so much of him you would back him with your vote"?

"Yes, and I wish I could, but, as I said, I have to be pragmatic, and there are bigger fish to fry this time around". The reality bear sighed, "I suppose what I'm really doing is voting to keep out the second candidate, and I wish I could defend my choice better".

"That's shameful!" said Goldilocks

"Yes, yes it is. But after all, this is a broken system" replied the reality bear with a wink.


...
Okay, I bought way too much into that metaphor

 

[[serious]]

Then reality bear Jr. came up and said, "well, luckily, odds are you live in a state that is pretty well guaranteed to go a a specific candidate no matter who you pick. Unless to live in one of the dozen or so swing states, feel free to vote not for the lesser of two evils (or the evil of two lessers) but rather vote on principle knowing that even though he doesn't have a prayer, a vote showing dissatisfaction with the current state of things will perhaps make one of the two main parties work to draw you back in."

 

[Staccato]

"That's true reality bear Jr." said reality bear, solemnly nodding his head, "The fact that a vote is worth more in Ohio than it is in Texas has always been the problem with our Electoral College system."

"Why don't we change it to a plurality vote across all the states, so that the candidate who actually gets the most votes wins?" asked Goldilocks

"Because we're tied up with a Constitutional mechanism that shows no signs of being changed and lost its appeal many a year ago", replied reality bear, "And until then, we'll just have to put up with what we've got".

 

[tulc]

...which is when Goldilocks noticed the sky was suddenly much darker and a cold wind started to blow in off the Atlantic, carrying with it the stench of rotting fish and other things best left unconsidered. "Wow," she said "it sure has gotten dark fast around here!" She felt rather then saw a strange set of eyes on her and when she turned around there standing right behind her was what appeared to be a man, wrapped in a long flowing cloak that seemed to...twitch in ways not connected to the wind blowing, as if what was under it wasn't completely human. The figure wore a wide brimmed hat pulled low on his brow casting his face in a deep shadow from which Goldilocks could just make out what appeared to be two widely spaced red pinpricks. "My goodness," Goldilocks thought "if those are his eyes they certainly are very far apart!" Suddenly the figure spoke! In a voice that seemed to mix the sound of ocean waves and the screams of things doomed to be tormented forever, he said: "I heard those fools prattling on about voting for this candidate or that candidate because he was the LESSER of evils, may I suggest an alternative?" And with that he pressed something (covered with an eldritch ichor that also gave off the overwhelming smell that surrounded Goldilocks) into her hand and then he was gone, leaving Goldilocks staring down at a round button with these blasphmous words engraved on them
!
tulc(the stars are right brothers and sisters!)

 

[Staccato]

...which is when Goldilocks noticed the sky was suddenly much darker and a cold wind started to blow in off the Atlantic, carrying with it the stench of rotting fish and other things best left unconsidered. "Wow," she said "it sure has gotten dark fast around here!" She felt rather then saw a strange set of eyes on her and when she turned around there standing right behind her was what appeared to be a man, wrapped in a long flowing cloak that seemed to...twitch in ways not connected to the wind blowing, as if what was under it wasn't completely human. The figure wore a wide brimmed hat pulled low on his brow casting his face in a deep shadow from which Goldilocks could just make out what appeared to be two widely spaced red pinpricks. "My goodness," Goldilocks thought "if those are his eyes they certainly are very far apart!" Suddenly the figure spoke! In a voice that seemed to mix the sound of ocean waves and the screams of things doomed to be tormented forever, he said: "I heard those fools prattling on about voting for this candidate or that candidate because he was the LESSER of evils, may I suggest an alternative?" And with that he pressed something (covered with an eldritch ichor that also gave off the overwhelming smell that surrounded Goldilocks) into her hand and then he was gone, leaving Goldilocks staring down at a round button with these blasphmous words engraved on them !
tulc(the stars are right brothers and sisters!)

Well I can't argue with that. Cthulhu to win in a write-in landslide in Innsmouth this year

 

[Gremlins]

Then Goldilox realised she could vote Green, the only reasonable option

 

[[serious]]

"That's true reality bear Jr." said reality bear, solemnly nodding his head, "The fact that a vote is worth more in Ohio than it is in Texas has always been the problem with our Electoral College system."

"Why don't we change it to a plurality vote across all the states, so that the candidate who actually gets the most votes wins?" asked Goldilocks

"Because we're tied up with a Constitutional mechanism that shows no signs of being changed and lost its appeal many a year ago", replied reality bear, "And until then, we'll just have to put up with what we've got".

Then reality bear Jr said, "but luckily, some rather clever people have been working on a way of changing that without a full amendment. You see, while electoral votes are in the constitution, the states can require the electoral college members to vote according to certain rules. Thus far, this has been used to ensure that an electoral college member promising to vote for Mr. Smith doesn't get selected and then turn around and vote for Mr. Jones anyway. However, if enough states passed legislation that gave all their electoral votes to the winner of the national election, then we could create a defacto direct election. Not every state would have to sign on, just enough to pull the election. Several states are considering passing legislation that would implement such a policy once a majority of electoral votes are decided in such a way."

"wow, isn't this whole three bears analogy getting rather tired?" said goldielocks.

"No" said all bears present.

 

[tollyT]

Once upon a time, Goldilocks was skipping through the town when she saw an election going on.... having recently turned 18 and registered to vote, she decided to check out the candidates for President....

She looked at the first candidate and said "this one's too young, and inexperienced to be President"....

She looked at the second one and said "this one's waaaay too old and has had too much cancer to be President"....

She looked at the third one, under sixty years old, but with over twenty years of experience in public service including service in the CIA, as a US Attorney, and in Congress, and said "this one's juuuust right"....

Then she looked at the platforms of the three candidates....

She looked at the first candidate and said "this one says he wants to get us out of the War, but he also wants to jack up our taxes and expand government a whole lot"....

She looked at the second one and said "this one wants to cut some taxes, but wants to stay in this War for a hundred years, plus get us into a bunch of other wars that won't make us safer and that we can't afford, and hey, he also wants to expand government a whole lot"....

And then she looked at the third one and said, "this one wants to get us out of the War, and keep us out of other wars, and he wants to cut taxes a whole bunch too!!"

But then some brainwashed hack came up and said, "you have to vote for one of the first two, cause even though they both suck, voting for the third candidate is throwing your vote away, and besides we're trying to kick him off the ballot anyway, because.... uh, because uh...." but Goldilocks didn't need to hear anymore to know that the hack was indeed totally brainwashed and had bought into a broken system....

This is brilliant. I bow to you, oh, intelligent one.

You have made your mark with me, and although we disagree much, you are seeing things clearly. I will follow your future posts, and since you have set your own 'milestone' very high, I will expect the same from you in the future.

I haven't enjoy a post here as much for quite some time.

The McCain hit about the '100 yrs in Iraq' is a slam. But you are on the mark with everything else. And your prose making your point is beautiful.

'Somebody has been sleeping in my bed'. The MSM, the DNC, and the RNC. That's who.

Again, congrats for a great post.

Respectfully,

Tolly