Give "Bad" Advice

[Matthew-59]

Haven't seen this game played here, so I'll start it.

Here's how it works....

A question is asked and the next person gives "bad" advice to that question, and then asks a question for the next person to give bad advice to.

Q: What is the best way to get my hair cut?

 

[Just4Jesus]

Haven't seen this game played here, so I'll start it.

Here's how it works....

A question is asked and the next person gives "bad" advice to that question, and then asks a question for the next person to give bad advice to.

Q: What is the best way to get my hair cut?

Probably with a lawn mower


How should you get your kids to school?

 

[lucypevensie]

Let your kids drive themselves if they want to go to school so bad.

What should I make for dinner tonight?

 

[Matthew-59]

LOL!!! That's some good "bad" advice you both gave!

What should I make for dinner tonight?

Make tadpole and lily pad soup. Everybody likes that.

Where is the best place to buy groceries?

 

[lucypevensie]

Amazon. You might have to wait a few days for a gallon of milk or whatever, but it sure beats driving to a grocery store.

What's the best way to get someone to stop snoring?

 

[andreha]

Amazon. You might have to wait a few days for a gallon of milk or whatever, but it sure beats driving to a grocery store.

What's the best way to get someone to stop snoring?

Easy, just pour a cup of mouthwash down the throat of the snorer. The snorer should stop real fast - plus, snorer will have fresh mouth after waking up.

How can I make more friends at work?

 

[Matthew-59]

How can I make more friends at work?

Oh that's easy to do. Every time someone makes a mistake be sure to run to the boss and tell on them. Your coworkers will really appreciate that and practically beg to be your friend.

Should I go to work today?

 

[andreha]

Oh that's easy to do. Every time someone makes a mistake be sure to run to the boss and tell on them. Your coworkers will really appreciate that and practically beg to be your friend.

Should I go to work today?

Nope, rather stay home for a week or so. Your boss will admire the fact that you have the boldness to choose your own schedule.

Do wild lions like it if you poke them with a stick?

 

[Matthew-59]

Do wild lions like it if you poke them with a stick?

Yes of course! However, if you are going to poke them with a stick, be sure to take away all their credit cards first so they can't charge you.

With the price of gasoline being so high these days, how can I get my car's tank filled up?

 

[brinny]

use fire wood...it's free and yer car will really get a bang out of it..

my dryer is broke...how EVER will i dry my laundry?

 

[lucypevensie]

Tie 1 or 2 items to the back of your bike and take a spin or two around the block. Repeat till all laudry is dry. The wind will dry them and you'll get tons of exercise in the process.

Any tips to help me fall asleep faster?

 

[brinny]

yes, watch a political debate....works ev'ry time

i've fergotten how to dance...what should i do?

 

[Matthew-59]

i've fergotten how to dance...what should i do?

Go to your local gunsmith shop, load up all the revolvers, and have everyone start shooting at your feet. Trust me, you'll learn how to dance really fast.

I need a new computer. How can I get one?

 

[brinny]

i heard Best Buy is givin' them away free...just go on in there and take yer fav'rite one...no problem...you can even ask the clerk to help you carry it out of the store...

it's raining and my window is stuck...how am i gonna keep the rain out?

 

[lucypevensie]

In your car? The only way to keep rain out of a broken car window is to drive 55 mph or more. This means no stopping at stop lights. Think of it as an adventure.

What's a good family movie we can rent tomorrow?

 

[Matthew-59]

What's a good family movie we can rent tomorrow?

If you're looking for a real good classic movie that's completely family friendly, I've heard Nightmare on Elm Street is a most excellent one the whole family will enjoy.

Any idea how I can get a promotion at my job?

 

[lucypevensie]

Write "anonymous" letters to your boss from satisfied "clients" expressing what a great asset Matthew is to the company and how, if they were in charge, they'd see that he gets promoted to at least Sr vice president. Send at least 2 of these letters per week but vary the handwriting a bit.

How much should I pay for a haircut?

 

[Matthew-59]

How much should I pay for a haircut?

Twenty-five cents. If they ask for more, tell them you'll only pay what you think they are worth and not a penny more.

Where can I find some real good bargains on new clothes?

 

[lucypevensie]

The only way I know of is to get to know the designers personally. For instance, since I've become friends with Louis Vuitton, I've been able to purchase scarves for just $550 apiece instead of the usual $600.

Go any surefire remedies for an upset tummy that's been given too much food?

 

[Matthew-59]

Got any surefire remedies for an upset tummy that's been given too much food?

Drink 2 cups of Liquid Plumber. If that don't work, add in a cup of battery acid. Just be sure to use a titanium cup.

I went to the dentist today. How can I pay the bill?