as posted by me on another board - cut and pasted -
Ive really gotten a lot out of looking into this whole topic. From my reading Im seeing that there are many versions of pre-destination:
1)double pre destination where God from the beginning of time chose some for heaven, and others perish. Those chosen cannot refuse grace. Gods choices are Gods choices and we dont question why/how the choice is made. (Lots of possibility in this - God can, for example, come to a mulsim in his last moment of life, and give him the grace of Jesus, because hes elect? We cant judge who is "in" and who is "out" because we just don't know)
2)double pre destination, with a reason behind Gods choosing - God had foreknowledge as to who "would" accept his grace if offered, and those who are the elect are those whom God had this foreknowledge about. The damned are damned because God always knew they would refuse. (lots of ways to interpret this - the muslim on his death bed above, still a possibility, so can be very hopeful)
3)Catholic pre-destination - God has pre-destined that all are elect in Jesus (He came for all) but people then can make the choice to accept their salvation (or not) - grace is offered to everyone. Salvation by grace (all are elect) and choice (we must accept the grace.) Those who don't accept in this life are lost. Free will is very tied up with this, and its related to number 2 above, but more stress on Gods respect for free will. Its offered to all men, even those who never heard of Jesus can respond to the grace given them, by how they live their lives, but the grace is through Jesus. (lots of hopefulness in this - every [person ever born has the possibility of salvation, by responding, as she or she can, to whatever grace is given)
4)Universalist pre destination - God has elected every man and woman who has lived and eventually, everyone accepts this grace - nobody can ultimately refuse. Some universalists believe this acceptance can even happen after purification, after death, if one does not accept in life...(over all, total hope for all mankind in this)
5)Barthian pre destination (still working on understanding this) - Jesus was the "elect" - He came to take all sin onto himself, and all are elect in this choice. Many debates over whether this leads to universalism, or not. Barth said it didnt, necessarily, but many say that it does.
I would imagine, within reformed positions, people are on many ends of the spectrum, various positions?