Forgivness

[muuc27]

Hi,

I have spent my life being abused by my step father physicaly and verbaly. He still does this though I am now at uni and away from the situation. I do have to go home to it during term breaks though.

I know I have to forgive this man for what he has done but I don't know where to begin. Also I don't kno how I will ever be able to do this. He has caused me much hurt and pain.

The physical bruises and injuries heal but the verbal abuse I have recieved has cut very deep and very hard and at the age of 20 I still find it hard to not believe his 'lies'.

I have been diagnosed with clinical depression and have been on medication for 3 years. I have also been in therapy throuought this time. I also self harm and spend most of my life feeling suicidal (some days are worse than others).

I don't seem to be getting any better and wonder if my unforgivness is keeping me in this prison of depression and self harm.

The point of my post is to see what the rest of you think about how I might begin to forgive this man and how I can get out of this place of depression.

Thanks for reading my random waffle!

Jess

 

[Mr.Cheese]

I don't claim to a situation like yours. Dad left my senior year. I pretty much had nothing to do with him after that. I was always angry, irritated. I had a bad attitude and no patience. This flowed over into other areas of life. I was unable to make good decisions. It was like a hand pressing down on me and keeping me from doing anything in life. Years later I finally let go of it all. It was a great relief. This is the extremely abridged version of the story. I had all the right in the world to be angry. But that anger, although justified, wasn't doing me a bit of good.
Now, my story pales in comparison to what you are going through. But maybe this can help you see what letting it go did for me.

 

[HesMyAll]

My heart goes out to you.  And I know that its hard but for your own sake you must forgive him.  If you hold unforgiveness in your heart it will become the poison of bitterness; and bitterness is its own prison.

Also, as hard as it may sound; pray for him.  He is lost and needs God.  It is also very hard to hold bitterness in your heart against someone when you are praying for God to bless them.  Of course the greatest blessing of all is salvation.

I would also suggest that you get some counseling from a pastor or youth minister to help you deal with these hurts that have come into your life.

I will be praying for you.  God bless.

 

[Katya]

Forgive yourself first, then you will be able to forgive him.

 

[GodOwnsMe]

wow, I can't say I've ever been in a situation like that but um...........
if ya wanna forgive him, God will not let you down but change you and help you, I'm sure ask him to heal your wounds, I know it can be a long process....it might help to remember/ ask God to show you howe much he loves you, so you'd rather be able to love your dad aswell..... Father please help muuc27 forgive her father, restore her and fill her heart with your love, peace and joy. Please fix whatever needs to be and help us fully rely on You. In Jesus' name. Amen
God Bless you sista

 

[DaveKerwin]

I think the root of the depression is a result of the abuse, but possibly something else too, maybe something you did not share.

I think God would be honored by your forgiveness. We are to be like Jesus, and I know Jesus would forgive anyone. So keep the mind of Christ and allow yourself to see him as he is, a sinner in need of forgiveness, just like we all are. I am sorry that this all had to happen to you.

I suggest forgiving him for what he has done, and praying for him to be healed of his abusive nature.

Draw near to God during this time, he is there for you, as we are too.

 

[OracleX]

Forgiveness is not always a easy thing to learn. If you want you can read a post I did about it. I learn to forgive by learning what God forgives.

http://www.christianforums.com/threads/34389.html

 

[minniemouse]

Forgiveness is a very difficult thing sometimes, this applies especially when you are forgiving something that is still being done to you, even if it is only part time. Pray on it and ask that the Lord help you to forgive him.

On a side note apart from forgiveness: Once you remove yourself completely from the situation you can really begin to heal, whereas since you are still in the position of abuse you are still being hurt. Also forgiveness may be achieved a little more readily then too.

I will keep you in my prayers.