Forced Abortion

[favoredbyGod]

Unfortunately my mom is here now for the fourth, she flies in every month and stays for 2 weeks at a time every month. She has a key since it technically is her apartment, so I cant skirt around that.

I tried to talk to her again, but apparently I shouldn't cry or be upset because I am "spoiled and I cant get everything I want", "Everything is not gonna go my way and I am so ungrateful and now it's all my fault".

So......................

 

[Catherineanne]

Unfortunately my mom is here now for the fourth, she flies in every month and stays for 2 weeks at a time every month. She has a key since it technically is her apartment, so I cant skirt around that.

I tried to talk to her again, but apparently I shouldn't cry or be upset because I am "spoiled and I cant get everything I want", "Everything is not gonna go my way and I am so ungrateful and now it's all my fault".

So......................

Pack your bag. Leave, and go to a women's refuge. If you can't find a refuge, go to the nearest church and ask for help. Do not wait to talk to your mother; do it. If you have money in the bank, then take as much of it with you in cash as you can get your hands on. Forget the lease; your mom will sort that out, as it is in her name.

If you do not, you will regret this for the whole of the rest of your life; every single day. This is your one chance. Leave, and keep the child.

You think you can't, but you can. What you cannot do is allow anyone to take your child away from you.

If your mother is not willing for her church to know about this, and is trying to hide it, then the sooner you tell that church that you are expecting, and are happy to be expecting, the better. Let them all know, and tell them that your parents were shocked at first, but are now getting over it.

You cannot allow this to happen. You are going to be a mother; it is time to grow up and act like one. Your child is in danger; it is up to you to save him or her.

God be with you.

 

[Catherineanne]

Unfortunately my mom is here now for the fourth, she flies in every month and stays for 2 weeks at a time every month. She has a key since it technically is her apartment, so I cant skirt around that.

If it is her appartment, then leave her to it. Go.

I tried to talk to her again, but apparently I shouldn't cry or be upset because I am "spoiled and I cant get everything I want", "Everything is not gonna go my way and I am so ungrateful and now it's all my fault".

So......................

The time for talking is past.

Now is the time to save your child. Only you can do it. I promise you, if you do, you will never, ever regret it.

 

[kaykay9.0]

Pack your bag. Leave, and go to a women's refuge. If you can't find a refuge, go to the nearest church and ask for help. Do not wait to talk to your mother; do it. If you have money in the bank, then take as much of it with you in cash as you can get your hands on. Forget the lease; your mom will sort that out, as it is in her name.

If you do not, you will regret this for the whole of the rest of your life; every single day. This is your one chance. Leave, and keep the child.

You think you can't, but you can. What you cannot do is allow anyone to take your child away from you.

If your mother is not willing for her church to know about this, and is trying to hide it, then the sooner you tell that church that you are expecting, and are happy to be expecting, the better. Let them all know, and tell them that your parents were shocked at first, but are now getting over it.

You cannot allow this to happen. You are going to be a mother; it is time to grow up and act like one. Your child is in danger; it is up to you to save him or her.

God be with you.

I agree with Catherineanne. You must do whatever you need to do to save the baby.
Have you been attending a church in the town where you went to school? If so, contact THAT pastor. If that is not an option, lovesdolphins has invited you to pm her and let them help you find someone who WILL help you in your area. Take her up on that offer. As Catherineann said, this is a time for action. Ordinarily, I believe in honoring and obeying our parents. In this case, however, your parents are just very wrong and you need to not let them (or the circumstances) intimidate you into doing something which you yourself have stated that you know to be sinful.

 

[favoredbyGod]

As I stated before ,unfortuntately, "living a day in my shoes" would do justice. When your on the outside looking in, it's easy to say what you would do "IF" you were in my situation.

Yeah, its easy to say, "pack up leave", "go somewhere else", when you are at home with family, in a cozy bed, with transportation, support and money.

I too have been guilty of saying what I would do, until the shoe is on the other foot.

I know that abortion is a sin, I'm not uneducated or oblivious to that fact... I am just stuck between a rock in a hard place.

 

[goldenviolet]

sweetheart, bless your heart. this is a very deep part of your life. deep as in meaningful. one day at a time. all your worry is bound to clutter your head with options, directions, negative and rushing thoughts... i'm very saddened to hear that your family isn't supportive. i'm very saddened that you and your boyfriends face such consquences of your desires. nothing you decide will be easy. however, you need to come to terms with a plan. a plan that you can live with. a choice that when you look in the mirror, you feel satisfied, comforted, strength. its time to take charge. its your choice. your body. your offspring. i'm praying for you. you truelly are in a deep thoughtful place. measure things out so you stand up to your own values and can break away from being a child yourself. adulthood hits most of us like a train. so many decisions, demands, just poof and you are an adult. it sneaks up on us. bless your heart hun. message me if you need to talk. xo dee

 

[goldenviolet]

i'm back. i cannot think straight because my heart aches for you. again, if you need to talk privately, please message me. xo dee

 

[Maggie893]

Hi Favored,

I have been in your shoes and I know a lot about what you are going through.

I want to just share a few things that you might want to consider for a bit.

You are hormonal right now. That means that your brain is firing off at a rate that isn't normal for you. It makes it hard to think straight. I'm not saying you can't think straight, I'm actually saying this because I know that you can think straight if you force yourself to be calm and to try to set aside the emotions that are running through you.

That was hard for me to do and I failed.

When I was in your shoes, I thought I had considered every option. Now that my baby is gone though.....and she would have been your age right now.....I can think of many additional avenues I could have gone down if only I had taken time to calm down and to get some advice and really think about things.

I also didn't take the time to talk straight with people. To call them out on their behavior and to really talk to them about what the future would mean.

Here are some thoughts about your future:

Your body is already changing to adapt to your child.
It will never be the same again.

Once your baby has been removed from you, there will be internal scarring which could prevent future pregnancies.

That means possibly no future children for you and future grandchildren for your parents.

There is absolutely no way to know if you will ever have a child after this.

I never did and now likely never will. Adoption will be my only choice it appears.

Everyday for the rest of your life you will know in your heart that you failed your child.

God will forgive you but I don't know a single woman, myself included, who has fully forgiven herself.

Whenever you see a baby, you will think of what you are missing.

As the years pass you will recognize your child in the eyes of children who would be his/her age.

You will wonder what kind of mother, what kind of person you would have been.

When you talk to others about the 10 commandments, you will be one who can say that you commit the sin of murder.

You will resent your mother deeply for this. It will affect your relationship for the rest of your life.

You will resent your father for not protecting you

You will resent your boyfriend and his family for not "doing more".

You will resent yourself for not "doing more".

If you are like the majority of women who have abortions, you will experience life-long bouts of depression, suicidal tendancies, eating and sleeping disorders and relationship/trust issues.

You will always need, or think about needing a counselor.

I could go on. I'm sharing these things not to scare you because I know that what you are going through is scary enough. I share this so that you will take these issues to your mother and make her discuss every one of them.

You all need a better, clearer picture of what is happening. A child is about to die at your hands. I can tell you with great surety that while today you think you were forced to have the abortion and you might justify it that way for a while after......in truth, once time passes you will realize that this isn't forced. There are always more options that God provides. You have to be strong....you have to trust Him.....you have to be willing to lay down your life for this child....if you do that all the doors you can imagine will be opened to you.

If you have the child, even if you give him/her up for adoption, every day you can wake up knowing that you did everything you could. Every day is a new day to do the right thing for the child even if the day before you yelled at them in anger...it will be a new day to do the right thing.

If you have the abortion, it's over. Every day you will awake knowing that there is nothing you can do to make things right....ever. Trust me when I tell you it's a terrible feeling.


I will be praying for you to take a breather and think...talk it over with your boyfriend, his parents, your mother and father, a pastor....everyone and anyone. If you are in New England let me know, perhaps there is even more I could do.

 

[favoredbyGod]

Thanks to all of your prayers and many of my own God came through for me and gave my mother a change of heart.
We were at the place when all of a sudden she said, "Get your stuff, we are leaving."

She then told me that she would help me in any way she could, I am due in December so I will be in grad school til then, so I am in the process of looking for a job in my new area.
I am so happy that this part is over, now I must face the rest of my family and church family which I will do at my own pace (Which will be extremely hard, but nonetheless, easier to do compared to what I was faced with)

 

[favoredbyGod]

*I AM SO GRATEFUL TO GOD FOR MOVING ON MY MOTHER'S HEART*


Now where do I go from here with telling my family who will be highly disappointed and my critical church family?

ANY SUGGESTIONS

 

[Maggie893]

*I AM SO GRATEFUL TO GOD FOR MOVING ON MY MOTHER'S HEART*


Now where do I go from here with telling my family who will be highly disappointed and my critical church family?

ANY SUGGESTIONS

Praise God!!!



My suggestions are simple.

Spend a lot of time with God. Stay humble in your heart knowing your sins and the Grace of God.

Not everyone will respond well but many will. Take heart in those that to do and be patient and loving with those that don't. Don't try to defend yourself....let God be your defense. Keep your focus on God and your baby.

You'll be fine.

 

[Mr.Cheese]

.

 

[Criada]

Just read through the thread, I am so glad your mother changed her mind.
I know things will be tough for you, but God has shown that He cares about you and your little one. Trust Him, tell people as you need to, and if anyone criticizes, remind them that this little one is a child planned by God before the beginning of creation, not a 'mistake'.
Praying for you and your family

 

[mourningdove~]

*I AM SO GRATEFUL TO GOD FOR MOVING ON MY MOTHER'S HEART*


Now where do I go from here with telling my family who will be highly disappointed and my critical church family?

ANY SUGGESTIONS

Above all else ...
trust God, and in the great love He has for you.

The fear of man has made many of us
to do things we later grew to deeply regret,
things that have brought great sorrow into our lives,
until He drew us near to Him, for the forgiveness and healing we have needed.

But it is the fear of the Lord, the desire to want to please Him first,
that is what brings us great joy in this world,
and the peace we all so desire in our hearts.

May God bless you and keep you, and your dear child, too.

 

[mourningdove~]

This is truly the worse year of my life.....

p.s. ...

Before it is over, it may prove to be one of your 'best' ...
... as all that is now happening to you
may serve to draw you nearer to the Lord ...
and what greater 'blessing' is there for us than 'this',
that we would be drawn nearer to Him ...

I join with the others here,
in praying that things continue to go well for you ...

 

[goldenviolet]

praise the Lord!