Food for thought

[Macrina]

"Mr. Smith, you were held up at gunpoint at the corner of First and Main?"
"Yes."
"Did you struggle with the robber?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"He was armed."
"Then you made a conscious decision to comply with his demands rather than resist?"
"Yes."
"Did you scream? Cry out?"
"No. I was afraid."
"I see. Have you ever been held up before?"
"No."
"Have you ever given money away?"
"Yes, of course."
"And you did so willingly?"
"What are you getting at?"
"Well, let's put it like this, Mr. Smith. You've given money away in the past. In fact, you have quite a reputation for philanthropy. How can we be sure that you were not contriving to have your money taken from you by force?"
"Listen, if I wanted..."
"Never mind. What time did this holdup take place, Mr. Smith?"
"About 11:00pm."
"You were out on the street at 11:00pm? Doing what?"
"Just walking."
"Just walking? You know that it's dangerous being out on the street that late at night. Weren't you aware that you could have been held up?"
"I hadn't thought about it."
"What were you wearing at the time, Mr. Smith?"
"Let's see... a suit. Yes, a suit."
"An expensive suit?"
"Well, yes. I am a successful lawyer, you know."
"In other words, Mr. Smith, you were walking around the streets late at night in a suit that practically advertised the fact that you might be a target for some easy money, isn't that so? I mean, if we didn't know better, Mr. Smith, we might even think that you were asking for this to happen, mightn't we?"

 

[Pilgrim1951]

Great post!

 

[beetlequeendiva]

I saw this posted in the WD and thought it was great - really gets the point across

 

[shazabella]

Rape is the only crime that the victim has to prove their innocence- sad cos in most justice systems isn't it innocent until proven guilty ?

- Shaz

 

[readytofly]

I agree! Awesome post. It makes a lot of sense.

 

[Truly Blessed]

Rape is the only crime that the victim has to prove their innocence- sad cos in most justice systems isn't it innocent until proven guilty ?

- Shaz

Your right it is sad that the victim has to prove the case, but the justice systems is looking at the person accused of the crime as being innocent until proven guilty, consequently the backlash. and I dont see how it is ever going to change to protect the victim, unfortunately.

 

[mesue]

good one P Mac!

 

[ZACTAK]

I learned it psychology how people like to blame the victim of a rape because they deserved it or whatever for some reason, and that is completely far from the truth... and our professor outlined that too.

 

[Macrina]

I learned it psychology how people like to blame the victim of a rape because they deserved it or whatever for some reason, and that is completely far from the truth... and our professor outlined that too.

Yeah. Something that I learned in psychology is that we want to believe that things like this can't happen if we just take the right precautions... so we tell ourselves that the victim did something wrong, something that we wouldn't do... and the victim, along with many other reasons, tells him/herself that they are somehow to blame -- because that makes it preventable in the future.

 

[makkulu]

I agree on the psychology aspect of it (and great post Macrina!).

We look at this a bit in terms of the incidence of violent crime in australia, (I teach criminal law) and the thing that surprises every student is that most violence (of whatever type) occurs between people who know each other, and occurs in a private location (like a home). When they ask "why does the media always focus on the stranger danger stuff or the home invasion stuff" I suggest that it is because we want to believe that violence is preventable, that it is "out there" and that if we just have the right security system and a big dog at home, stay away from pubs and clubs and don't join a gang, and don't walk alone at night, we can be safe. Those things help, but they won't be the solution overall to around 80% of violence. We need to respect each other and realise that you will never lay eyes on a person who is not loved by God (as some theologian - I forget which one, once said).

Interpersonal violence, especially against women, requires some serious attitude changes on a systemic societal level. But in order for that to occur, each of us (male and female) has to ensure that our own attitudes are in line with the heart of our Father - including refusing to blame victims even when we feel guilt or regret or whatever - those are a natural reaction and not indicative of blameworthiness. And speaking up and making comparisons with other crimes, such as those in this thread, and helping people to see what the issues really are, particularly regarding sexual violence, which I don't see as being predominantly about sex anyway.... and now it's time for my favourite quote on the subject:

"rape is not about sex. If you got hit over the head with a shovel, you wouldn't call it gardening, would you?"

Makk