Feel Like a Failure

[JoeinPA]

Well my forties so far aren't looking too fabulous. I'm 43,I'm just going through a separation with my wife and am back up near my family and hometown and it's been a time for reflection. I mean,I'm always thinking about things but it just hit me again how much of a failure in life I feel.

For example, my sister is 39 and has been with a pharmaceutical company for 16 years and yesterday we got into an argument about something and she said she works with doctors who make alot of money but you have no place to speak because where are you in life?...

I know deep down that I've gone through experiences most people have yet to,so I feel that I have more practical knowledge than people who have been buried in one place for all those years. Maybe it's part of a midlife crisis,but lately I've been wishing alot that I'd done things differently in life and would've had a better history. Now looking back it just looks like a big mess...I've had over 60 jobs and looked at that as various learning experience,but not so great on the wallet. I've got nothing financially,and to me that's like the backbone of life to me...if you don't have money you don't have much. Similar to what people say about health.

I'm not sure if it's too late now to start cleaning up,but perhaps I just gave up awhile back when I was going through those storms and just thought that somehow things will work out,like I'll hit a big lottery or something. But I realize I need something bankable to count on.

Where do I go from here?...

 

[Lets chat 40]

So, wanna have a chat ?

 

[Lets chat 40]

Hi
I am sorry if many messages came through but I am trying to figure out this page and every time I send something I am not sure if it went through.

 

[ALEA40]

Hi there,

I'm sorry! That was pretty hurtful. I guess we all say stupid things sometimes I would just forgive her and understand that some people work at places for a long time for various reasons. I always did due to issues with security and fear of losing my job/not having enough money/not having health insurance/reputation/etc. My brother in law has a similar story to yours and I've often wondered if he has issues with ADHD. Have you had any issues with this? He's now a pastor in a church and just got an amazing job as a supervisor in a healthcare product factory (very strict protocols). Two very steady, long-term career places.

It's not too late to consider an entirely new career. In your 40s, you are still looking at 20+ years to invest in a career. I'm starting over at 40 and going to school for special education. I was an environmental planner for 10 years prior to staying home to raise children. The ego in me is kind of bruised looking around at all the people so far in their career and here I am starting over. But when God calls you to do something, who am I to question it?

Is God calling you in any particular direction? I would pray on it and look for signs and clues leading you in the right direction.

Blessings!

 

[LilLamb219]

Ignore what other people think about you and see this as an opportunity to begin anew. Being in your 40s does not mean you're at the end of your lifeline! We can learn new things at ANY age and change careers when we like! Try to come up with some goals you'd like to meet and then sit down and figure out ways you'd feel would be best to achieve them! Take baby steps as necessary! Life in the 40s is awesome

 

[JoeinPA]

My brother in law has a similar story to yours and I've often wondered if he has issues with ADHD. Have you had any issues with this?
Is God calling you in any particular direction? I would pray on it and look for signs and clues leading you in the right direction.

Blessings!

Yes I do believe I may have some a.d.d. but it kind of runs in my family too,on my father's side my half siblings mostly have moved alot and had some various jobs as well.

I don't feel I'm being called in any particulat direction right now,as a matter of fact quite the contrary...to be in many places to help where needed. But unfortunately the salary doesn't follow;

 

[ALEA40]

Yes I do believe I may have some a.d.d. but it kind of runs in my family too,on my father's side my half siblings mostly have moved alot and had some various jobs as well.

I don't feel I'm being called in any particular direction right now,as a matter of fact quite the contrary...to be in many places to help where needed. But unfortunately the salary doesn't follow;

We are all given unique gifts and we have unique challenges in our lives. Before becoming a Christian, I was always trying to live up to other people's standards (My mother's mantra while I was growing up was "get a god job with good benefits"). That can become very damaging over time. As a Christian, I have been set free. The ONLY standard that I care about now is God's standard through His son, Jesus Christ. Don't believe for a second that you are a failure!!! You are a child of God. He has amazing plans for you!!! Blessings to you!!!