I had developed a very 'fundamentalist' belief system after reading some things on the internet soon after I was born again. One of these beliefs was that the world was ending very soon. I later realized how unstable these beliefs and thoughts were but now I'm struggling with a lot of thoughts. I used to believe God would send everyone who wasn't Christian to Hell because the Bible says this, but now I'm really struggling with this thought. I don't see how God could send anyone to Hell, especially for an eternity. I don't see how God could send anyone to an eternity of suffering just because they weren't Christian.
And I now worry that since I'm no longer as 'zealous,' I'm no longer saved and I've become 'lukewarm.' And God will send me to Hell, and I remember the Bible verse that says lukewarm Christians will suffer more in Hell (Luke 12:47.) I used to view God as very loving and perfect but now I have a very unhealthy image of Him, and an unhealthy fear of Him, and I keep having fears of Him judging me and sending me to Hell for an eternity for becoming 'lukewarm.' I know people say the reason non-believers suffer in Hell is because Hell is 'separation from God,' but I can't imagine someone really deserving to suffer in Hell for eternity. I keep having images in my mind of a person living a normal life, and then being sent to Hell for eternity and burning in Hell for eternity because they weren't a true Christian. All of these thoughts are causing a lot of anxiety. And it's much worse because I have anxiety and OCD, and all these thoughts are very anxiety-inducing.
And I now worry that since I'm no longer as 'zealous,' I'm no longer saved and I've become 'lukewarm.' And God will send me to Hell, and I remember the Bible verse that says lukewarm Christians will suffer more in Hell (Luke 12:47.) I used to view God as very loving and perfect but now I have a very unhealthy image of Him, and an unhealthy fear of Him, and I keep having fears of Him judging me and sending me to Hell for an eternity for becoming 'lukewarm.' I know people say the reason non-believers suffer in Hell is because Hell is 'separation from God,' but I can't imagine someone really deserving to suffer in Hell for eternity. I keep having images in my mind of a person living a normal life, and then being sent to Hell for eternity and burning in Hell for eternity because they weren't a true Christian. All of these thoughts are causing a lot of anxiety. And it's much worse because I have anxiety and OCD, and all these thoughts are very anxiety-inducing.
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