I wanted to share my joy. You see, several years ago I fell into this dark time in life when I could not find God. It seemed as though I would pray and get nothing. During that time I asked God to speak with me through a dream if He could not reach me any other way.
Well...I had the dream. God told me that if I wanted to be close to Him I had to serve the word of God to others. I understood my calling at that point but have run from it because I felt that I could not do it. I felt unable and I felt that I would be neglecting my family if I went that way.
Well things have been horrible. My wife and I have been attacked on every front by the forces of demons. Daily we called out to God and found no help. Until today I felt as though I was given a choice.
I felt the choice was given to turn my back on "the god who does not answer", or to trust and serve Him even if I never have an answer. I will be honest that I was tempted with all that has happened. But I chose to lay myself down before God.
Imagin Job...he had as much reason as anyone to turn on God yet he did not! I feel as though I have been through Jobs trial.
But here is the thing...I ran from this calling and I feel as though today God has said "Choose to serve me or not". You see in the dream he said if I wanted to be close to Him I needed to serve the people Gods word. That means if I do not do that then I will not be close to God.
I chose to serve Him and trust Him for my strength and help. Tomarow I call a bible college seminary to ask about a grant. It feels good to just trust God. Now this last thing is what gives me joy.
My wife said I was excited about the journey.
I told her it isn't the journey that excites me...it is knowing God is walking with me that excites me!
Well...I had the dream. God told me that if I wanted to be close to Him I had to serve the word of God to others. I understood my calling at that point but have run from it because I felt that I could not do it. I felt unable and I felt that I would be neglecting my family if I went that way.
Well things have been horrible. My wife and I have been attacked on every front by the forces of demons. Daily we called out to God and found no help. Until today I felt as though I was given a choice.
I felt the choice was given to turn my back on "the god who does not answer", or to trust and serve Him even if I never have an answer. I will be honest that I was tempted with all that has happened. But I chose to lay myself down before God.
Imagin Job...he had as much reason as anyone to turn on God yet he did not! I feel as though I have been through Jobs trial.
But here is the thing...I ran from this calling and I feel as though today God has said "Choose to serve me or not". You see in the dream he said if I wanted to be close to Him I needed to serve the people Gods word. That means if I do not do that then I will not be close to God.
I chose to serve Him and trust Him for my strength and help. Tomarow I call a bible college seminary to ask about a grant. It feels good to just trust God. Now this last thing is what gives me joy.
My wife said I was excited about the journey.
I told her it isn't the journey that excites me...it is knowing God is walking with me that excites me!
