(I have posted this before, but I wanted to post it in the testimony section. 
)
My Testimony....Where Do I Begin?
I was raised a Christian in a HUGE church in Naperville, IL called Calvary Church. Even today, I still haven't found a more on fire church. I accepted Jesus sometime between the ages of 3 and 5. But I never really understood it because I was so young.
When I was 10, I think, I went to camp. There, I was filled with the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in other tongues. It was an amazing expierience. One I will never forget.
But I was still searching for something...
When I was 12, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. That hit me hard. Why did God do that to her? When I was lost and crying and scared, God gave me an angel. My best friend Peter. I had remembered praying for an angel when I was younger. One I could see and talk to and be with. It took me a while to realize it, but God have given me Peter to be my guide. He would comfort me and help me when I was unsure of God.
My mom lived, thanks to everyone's prayer and support and God's undying grace. But God wasn't done with me yet. When I was 13, I went to a winter retreat with my church called Breakaway. There, I met the most on fire, hyper preacher ever. His name was Wayne Northrup. Every single one of his sermons left me in tears.
One night, we had a long worship service. All these painful memories (Mom's cancer battle, losing my other best friend because of a stupid arguement, being taunted and persecuted for my faith etc.) came flooding back. I fell to my knees crying hystarically. I cried out, "God! Please show me what you want to do with my life. Show Yourself! I can't find You." And I felt him say, "I'm already there, Tracy. I'm already there."
Peter came to me then, laying his hands on me and praying loud enough so I could here. I felt God say, "This is your best friend. Don't let him go." I was so grateful to God for blessing me with such a good friend. Peter stayed with me after service, as well as my good friend Rodney, talking with me and giving me support and advice. That day, I realized who my true friend was.
But some time after Breakaway, I lost God again. I don't know what happened. I felt lonely all the time and angry and depressed. I think it was because I had fallen in love with Peter, but he didn't seem to return the feeling. But recently, Peter told me that he couldn't help me with my struggles. He stepped back to let me figure things out on my own. His heart was in the right place. I understood why he had seemed to have been avoiding me. Then God said to me, "Things aren't going to get better unless you give everything to me."
I gave up all I had to God. I gave up my relationship with Peter, my relationship with my family and other friends, my academics, my everything. And I felt a huge weight come off my shoulders. God had made me SO joyful. And everything has been so much better since then. Peter and I are closer than ever, and I know I'm not gonna lose him. Our relationship is in God's hands. And as for all my other friends, those that really are true will stay with me. Those that aren't, I shouldn't trouble myself with.
I love God. I love my family. I love my friends. God has blessed me. I will follow Him forever.
Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start
But its now I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain
I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
Even when I don't see I still believe
~Jeremy Camp "I Still Believe"
Feedback, if you will please....
)My Testimony....Where Do I Begin?
I was raised a Christian in a HUGE church in Naperville, IL called Calvary Church. Even today, I still haven't found a more on fire church. I accepted Jesus sometime between the ages of 3 and 5. But I never really understood it because I was so young.
When I was 10, I think, I went to camp. There, I was filled with the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in other tongues. It was an amazing expierience. One I will never forget.
But I was still searching for something...
When I was 12, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. That hit me hard. Why did God do that to her? When I was lost and crying and scared, God gave me an angel. My best friend Peter. I had remembered praying for an angel when I was younger. One I could see and talk to and be with. It took me a while to realize it, but God have given me Peter to be my guide. He would comfort me and help me when I was unsure of God.
My mom lived, thanks to everyone's prayer and support and God's undying grace. But God wasn't done with me yet. When I was 13, I went to a winter retreat with my church called Breakaway. There, I met the most on fire, hyper preacher ever. His name was Wayne Northrup. Every single one of his sermons left me in tears.
One night, we had a long worship service. All these painful memories (Mom's cancer battle, losing my other best friend because of a stupid arguement, being taunted and persecuted for my faith etc.) came flooding back. I fell to my knees crying hystarically. I cried out, "God! Please show me what you want to do with my life. Show Yourself! I can't find You." And I felt him say, "I'm already there, Tracy. I'm already there."
Peter came to me then, laying his hands on me and praying loud enough so I could here. I felt God say, "This is your best friend. Don't let him go." I was so grateful to God for blessing me with such a good friend. Peter stayed with me after service, as well as my good friend Rodney, talking with me and giving me support and advice. That day, I realized who my true friend was.
But some time after Breakaway, I lost God again. I don't know what happened. I felt lonely all the time and angry and depressed. I think it was because I had fallen in love with Peter, but he didn't seem to return the feeling. But recently, Peter told me that he couldn't help me with my struggles. He stepped back to let me figure things out on my own. His heart was in the right place. I understood why he had seemed to have been avoiding me. Then God said to me, "Things aren't going to get better unless you give everything to me."
I gave up all I had to God. I gave up my relationship with Peter, my relationship with my family and other friends, my academics, my everything. And I felt a huge weight come off my shoulders. God had made me SO joyful. And everything has been so much better since then. Peter and I are closer than ever, and I know I'm not gonna lose him. Our relationship is in God's hands. And as for all my other friends, those that really are true will stay with me. Those that aren't, I shouldn't trouble myself with.
I love God. I love my family. I love my friends. God has blessed me. I will follow Him forever.
Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start
But its now I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain
I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
Even when I don't see I still believe
~Jeremy Camp "I Still Believe"
Feedback, if you will please....
