seeingeyes
Newbie
I feel like this myself. I find myself giving up more and more and more "things" that I previously needed, and I fantasize about owning nothing at all except the clothes on my back. I want to live off of the grace of God.
Apparently, this is a strange desire. lol
I am already married and I have children, so my situation is a bit more complicated than yours. I won't just bail out on these people that I love. But perhaps the gift of "voluntary poverty" comes upon some of us for different reasons. I may not get the opportunity to be a wanderer, but someday, for some reason, if we all are thrown out into the street, I may be a unique source of comfort to my husband and children. Dad may very well be preparing me for hard times.
He may be preparing you for the same.
You have already received the standard, "Don't give up!" answer, so I'll offer you the opposite. Give up. Give everything up now while you have the chance. You have a rare opportunity and this is the free-est you will ever be in your life.
Have you talked to your fiance about this? Who knows? She may be on board with you.
I'll just leave this here:
"[Elijah] said, I have been very jealous for the Lord, the God of hosts. For the people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword, and I, even I only, am left, and they seek my life, to take it away.
And the Lord said to him, Go, return on your way to the wilderness of Damascus. And when you arrive, you shall anoint Hazael to be king over Syria. And Jehu the son of Nimshi you shall anoint to be king over Israel, and Elisha the son of Shaphat of Abel-meholah you shall anoint to be prophet in your place. And the one who escapes from the sword of Hazael shall Jehu put to death, and the one who escapes from the sword of Jehu shall Elisha put to death. Yet I will leave seven thousand in Israel, all the knees that have not bowed to Baal, and every mouth that has not kissed him.
You are not alone, brother.
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