Electric dream's

[Fear2Believe]

I remember my first experience with pornography, I was about 9 year's of age, and I found a few adult magazine's at my father's shipping company. I really liked what was in those magazine's, so I snuck them back to my parents house. For some reason I decided to put the pictures all over my wall, until my parents found out. I didn't get in any trouble, they just said "Take those down, you're too young to have those pictures"

As I got older, I was exposed to more and more pornography. It seemed to be everywhere, on television, on billboards, on windows in shopping centre's, in catalogues & women's magazine's. Then when I reached my late 20's I met an older Christian man who opened my eye's to a wide variety of thing's he consider sinful, and the consequences that would face me if I didn't leave my worldly lifestyle behind.

So I did what any naive person would do, and played wack a sin for 15+ year's of my life. Anything the Bible said was sinful, I'd be on the front line's praying to Jesus to kick those demon's out. But thing's got hard, real hard, as I eventually realised that if you wack one sin mole, another one pop's out.

For some reason sin couldn't be defeated, worse still the more I wacked my sin nature the less human I became. It got to the point that everything became an act of sin, so I completely shut down and couldn't function normally. Then it got even worse, because as I was trying to overcome sin with beliefs, I went darker.

So dark so, it became me.

 

[Sabertooth]

What are you hoping to hear from a forum full of Christians on the matter...?

 

[Fear2Believe]

What are you hoping to hear from a forum full of Christians on the matter...?

Truth.

 

[Sabertooth]

Truth.

How will you gauge or recognize it...?

 

[ripple the car]

Porn is tough. Sin is tough. Thing is, we deal with, battle, fight it, sometimes lose to it, and struggle to be good our whole lives.

I struggle with anger, and bitterness. It's always there. I am always fighting it. Christ is helping me to fight it, and over time, over time, the struggle begins to even out. It's still awful, though. And truly, the struggle against the flesh, against sin, is always going to be there, until we draw our last breath, in Christ's Mercy.

 

[bèlla]

You’ve ignored an important part of your story: your response to the older gentleman. That is the ray of light in everything you’ve said. And your efforts demonstrate a want to change. Not lip service. You understood the horrors of sin. Many don’t.

All that remains are two words: I can’t. You can’t do this without Him or alone. You need someone walking beside you. Someone bearing light who sees the road ahead when you can’t.

I’ve known many who’ve traveled a similar path but few who turned away as you did. The depravity draws them deeper until they become one with their pleasure and forsake their identity for labels and lifestyles they never abandon.

I think the fact you’re here and asking questions is good. I appreciate your transparency. That was very brave of you. Keep sharing. I will pray on your behalf for clarity and companions.

Seek the Light. He is near. Chase after it. Just like this.

 

[Fear2Believe]

How will you gauge or recognize it...?

I would say I'd recognise it so long as I reject any information that is based on pure speculation.

 

[AservantofGodandthelordJC]

Don't worry about eliminating sin but instead, finding divinity.

Sin cannot eliminate sin, that is an endless and impossible task. In fact, sin doesn't even exist, it is the absence of truth. Just as darkness is the absence of light.

John 16:13

 

[aiki]

So I did what any naive person would do, and played wack a sin for 15+ year's of my life. Anything the Bible said was sinful, I'd be on the front line's praying to Jesus to kick those demon's out. But thing's got hard, real hard, as I eventually realised that if you wack one sin mole, another one pop's out.

For some reason sin couldn't be defeated, worse still the more I wacked my sin nature the less human I became. It got to the point that everything became an act of sin, so I completely shut down and couldn't function normally. Then it got even worse, because as I was trying to overcome sin with beliefs, I went darker.

So dark so, it became me.

Well, if you'd read the Bible and understood God's way to freedom from sin, this would not have been your story. Sin is just a symptom of a deeper issue, which is Self in control of you. God's remedy for sin isn't for you to do the whack-a-mole thing you described but to live a crucified life (Matthew 16:24-25). When is Self is crucified, the sins it produces are overcome. Read Romans 6:1-18 and Galatians 2:20.