Egg Donation...

[Bella Vita]

I have been thinking about donating my eggs for a few years now. But in order to really consider it I had to wait until I was 21 years old. Now that I am I have thought about donating my eggs to a couple who can't get pregnant. Yes I will be getting paid for my donation and this will go to my husband's schooling/student loans and other life bills. But I don't want to do it just for the money I want to really help someone have a child. I was talking to someone the other day and they told me that a Christian shouldn't do this because I am playing God by giving a few of my eggs to a women who has bad eggs to help them have a child because they were never suppose to have children otherwise they would on their own. But really I don't think I am God is the one who will decide if the egg gets fertilized and actually makes a baby not me I am just helping the process along. Lots of children are born from the help of a donor if God didn't want those children born he wouldn't have them be born. Yes I am aware that half of my DNA will be out there in a child but it doesn't bother me the child will never be mine obviously it will be the couple who I am giving this amazing gift to. All of this is assuming I even get picked by a couple to use my eggs it goes by looks and IQ all kinds of things go into play if and when a couple chooses me and I can still turn them down both parties have to agree to use each other for this process.

Anyways has anyone else donated their eggs or know anyone who has what was your experience?

And what do you think of this all around issue from a Christian point of view?

 

[christdiedforus]

I don't see anything wrong with it at all especially considering your motives. I have a cousin that only has children because someone donated eggs for his wife. I really don't see a problem with this at all and who ever told you that was only speaking from their personal perspective IMO.

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

I think you have good intentions. However, personally, I couldn't stand the idea of not knowing what kind of people would be raising my child. (Also, I hope you don't mind that I am not Baptist - I just saw your thread in the newest posts and it caught my eye.)

 

[dies-l]

I am not completely sure how I feel about this, but I would tend to disagree with Christians participating in the manufacture of babies. I believe that God intends for a specific means of reproduction, wherein a man and woman become one flesh through an act of sexual union, open to the possibility of creating a child that is the genetic offspring of both the mother and the father. I think that the more we distance ourselves from this idea, the more we are distancing ourselves from God's plan.

My wife and I were diagnosed as infertile about a year ago. We had known for some time that there was a very strong possibility of infertility, but the medical diagnosis confirmed it. We looked briefly at various fertility treatments, such as IVF, sperm donation, etc., and ultimately decided that we would not seek to produce a baby by any means other than the way that God designed, and in no event would we even consider any treatment that resulted in the potential disposal of human embryos.

The more we have grown in our understanding of our issue and how we respond as Christians, the less this has become about abortion and disposal of embryos, and it has become more about understanding God's divine plan. And, I have come to believe that if we ask God, He WILL bless us with children, but He may not do it the way we want Him to. For us, this has meant that God has opened our hearts and lives to the possibility of taking in children from our state's foster care system. For others it may be through domestic infant adoption or international adoption. For others, the prayer might be answered with a miraculous and unexpected pregnancy.

But, I think that we do need to be careful about how much we try to force God's hand in these things. I believe that God has a plan for infertile couples, and I don't really believe that it is to manufacture babies through all sorts of medical procedures and processes. I believe that God's plan for reproduction, involves the fertilization of a wife's ovum by her husband as the result of an act of sexual intimacy. To stray from this is to fall short of God's ideal, which I believe is sin.

Also, I figured that I should make clear that I just read a chapter in a book about this topic the other day and the ideas are still fresh in my mind. That, perhaps, might influence some of my arguments on the issue, even though I have myself preferred to stay away from manufacturing children in my own life for as long as I have been aware of my infertility. The book is called "Adopted for Life" by Russell Moore.

 

[Bella Vita]

I think you have good intentions. However, personally, I couldn't stand the idea of not knowing what kind of people would be raising my child. (Also, I hope you don't mind that I am not Baptist - I just saw your thread in the newest posts and it caught my eye.)

You get to meet and know the couple who chooses you and you choose them. Anyone can back out if they don't feel comfortable with the other couple. So I would definitely want a Christian couple and I would never use my eggs to give gay couple children or anything like that I get a say as well as them. The baby is not mine it would be theirs to raise yes it is my DNA but the parents are responsible they are taking this on. It is no different than adoption it is their DNA out there but the adoptive parents are the ones responsible. Jesus was adopted and raised by a father that was not his. So the fact that it was genetically mine means nothing. It takes more than blood to be a parent.

 

[MrJim]

How much are you selling them for? I'd never heard of the practice until now.

 

[phoenixdem]

Is that somehow like selling your children?

 

[dies-l]

It is no different than adoption

It is very different than adoption. Adoption provides a home for a child that already exists, but who cannot be raised by his or her parents. Egg donation feeds a scientific procedure that is designed to manufacture a baby in an unnatural manner. You and I may disagree as to whether it is morally acceptable, and I can respect that. However, to say it is "no different than adoption" is just an incorrect assertion.

 

[EdMa]

How much are you selling them for? I'd never heard of the practice until now.

Last I heard like sell for like 3000 or something, sperm is like 75 bucks.

It is very different than adoption. Adoption provides a home for a child that already exists, but who cannot be raised by its parents. Egg donation feeds a scientific procedure that is designed to manufacture a baby in an unnatural manner. You and I may disagree as to whether it is morally acceptable, and I can respect that. However, to say it is "no different than adoption" is just an incorrect assertion.

I agree with dies-l on this, the two are totally different thing.

 

[Bella Vita]

It is very different than adoption. Adoption provides a home for a child that already exists, but who cannot be raised by its parents. Egg donation feeds a scientific procedure that is designed to manufacture a baby in an unnatural manner. You and I may disagree as to whether it is morally acceptable, and I can respect that. However, to say it is "no different than adoption" is just an incorrect assertion.

You read what I was saying wrong. I was saying that it is similar to adoption in the sense that the child is not my responsibility because I am not the parent. A person who gives their child up for adoption may be the natural parent but they aren't responsible they aren't a parent in any other sense. Same here the child is half mine by DNA but that's it DNA is all that connects us just like someone who gives their child up for adoption DNA is it. The child if one is produced is not my child or my responsibility and I will get to meet the couple and make sure they are good parents and good people I can back out if I am not comfortable at any time. But I will never meet the child or be in their life in anyway.

 

[Bella Vita]

Is that somehow like selling your children?

No I am selling the egg a child would be both egg and sperm combined. And there is no guarantee that it will produce a child it may not implant in the mother. But either way it's not my child it is their child my egg is my gift to them so that they can hopefully be closer to being parents.

 

[Bella Vita]

Last I heard like sell for like 3000 or something, sperm is like 75 bucks.



I agree with dies-l on this, the two are totally different thing.

It depends on were you live but it's about 10,000 and you can donate up to 6 times in your life.

But everyone I have talked to says that you shouldn't do it just for the money you should do it to give the gift of life because it is a hard process on your body. You have to get hormone shots for months you gain weight you can't have sex... then you go in for the procedure and they take out the eggs you are sore for a few days after. It is about a 3 month process all together....

 

[dies-l]

It depends on were you live but it's about 10,000 and you can donate up to 6 times in your life.

But everyone I have talked to says that you shouldn't do it just for the money you should do it to give the gift of life because it is a hard process on your body. You have to get hormone shots for months you gain weight you can't have sex... then you go in for the procedure and they take out the eggs you are sore for a few days after. It is about a 3 month process all together....

I know you mean well, but the more you talk about the details, the more I feel like this is not something that is God-honoring and respectful to human dignity. It sounds like you are talking about damaging your body so that you can help someone else play God in making their own designer children. This is not God's plan. This is pretty scary stuff if you ask me.

 

[Bella Vita]

I know you mean well, but the more you talk about the details, the more I feel like this is not something that is God-honoring and respectful to human dignity. It sounds like you are talking about damaging your body so that you can help someone else play God in making their own designer children. This is not God's plan. This is pretty scary stuff if you ask me.

It isn't damaging at all or else they wouldn't let you do it. You have to have a complete health physical and be in great shape before you can be considered they also monitor everything through out the process you go to the doctor a lot when you do this. You can go back to work 2 days after they take the eggs out all the hormones do is make you drop more eggs than normal so they can take them out hence the weight gain. I actually know someone who has done this 5 times she has a child of her own and is happy and is in perfect health. She has helped to create 3 babies so far 2 for one family and another for separate family. She is getting ready to do another round for another family. Not to mention she has totally paid off all her student loans and bought a house not to bad.

I was just saying that it is a process and a person shouldn't do it just for the money it does take time and is a little painful after. So you do have to come from a place of wanting to help the family or else you won't want to go through the whole thing it's more time consuming than anything. To get a total physical get picked by a family if they pick you met them start the injections do those for awhile going to the doctor through out then go in and get the eggs removed. Then after all that and they may not even have a baby it can be tough and takes a special person to donate.

 

[dies-l]

It isn't damaging at all or else they wouldn't let you do it.

I don't know enough about the process to say whether it is truly damaging or not. I'm just going by your description. But, your logic here is way off. There are lots of things that "they let you do" that are very damaging, ranging from kidney donations to smoking cigarettes. Just because someone with credentials lets you do it, doesn't mean it's not damaging.

You have to have a complete health physical and be in great shape before you can be considered they also monitor everything through out the process you go to the doctor a lot when you do this.

This would tend to lend credibility to my concerns about the safety of it, but ultimately my concern is about morality more than it is about safety.

You can go back to work 2 days after they take the eggs out all the hormones do is make you drop more eggs than normal so they can take them out hence the weight gain. I actually know someone who has done this 5 times she has a child of her own and is happy and is in perfect health. She has helped to create 3 babies so far 2 for one family and another for separate family. She is getting ready to do another round for another family. Not to mention she has totally paid off all her student loans and bought a house not to bad.

I was just saying that it is a process and a person shouldn't do it just for the money it does take time and is a little painful after. So you do have to come from a place of wanting to help the family or else you won't want to go through the whole thing it's more time consuming than anything. To get a total physical get picked by a family if they pick you met them start the injections do those for awhile going to the doctor through out then go in and get the eggs removed. Then after all that and they may not even have a baby it can be tough and takes a special person to donate.

Something in my spirit says that this is not good. But, rather than accepting my opinion (I am just some guy on the internet with an opinion), you should really talk to your pastor and some good Christian women. What you are describing sounds to me like something not all that different than eugenics, at least in its potential. I'd encourage you to stay away, but like I said, talk to your pastor and some strong Christian women. And, most importantly pray about it with an open heart that is willing to listen to God even if He says what you don't want to hear.

 

[green wolverine]

Do you ever want to have other children that you will raise? The reason I ask this is because 1 in 5 egg donors end up infertile as a result of the procedure. Here's part of an article from the DailyMail out of the Uk on the subject:

Those who come in search of a child are not told about the terrible risks imposed on egg donors - and even more scandalously, in some cases neither are the donors themselves.
Too often, those women are left damaged by the procedures they undergo - and a growing number have been robbed, as a result, of the chance to have families of their own.
They include women such as Alina Ionescu from Romania, whom I met in the grim post-communist centre of Bucharest.
In so many ways, Alina is just like any young bride. At just 20 years old and married for nine months, she dreams of a future in which she and her husband, Nicu, will watch their children grow.
But Alina may never have children. Two years ago, when she was saving to get married, a friend told her of an easy way to make money - she could donate her eggs at one of the many Eastern European clinics to which British women travel for fertility treatment.
The doctors at the Romanian clinic where Alina was paid £150 for her eggs - a clinic which had links with a leading London fertility centre - left her ovaries so damaged and scarred that she is now infertile.
Alina's story is not unique. Egg donation is a risky business, which causes side effects in one in five women who go through it. One in every 100 - and there are many hundreds each year - has her life and her fertility put in jeopardy, as Alina did.


Read more: The misery behind the baby trade | Mail Online

 

[Bella Vita]

Do you ever want to have other children that you will raise? The reason I ask this is because 1 in 5 egg donors end up infertile as a result of the procedure. Here's part of an article from the DailyMail out of the Uk on the subject:

Yes I am aware of the risks but you have over 3 million eggs I will never use all of those ever. My husband and I will talk to the doctors and see what the risks are ect. I may wait until after i have my kids and then do it. I still don't even know for sure if I am i am still just thinking about it.

 

[MrJim]

Around the world folks sell body fluids and organs for cash and I suppose one could view eggs the same way but I would tend to agree with dies-l that you ought to talk it over with your pastor and other mature folks in your church.

And I would suggest you don't use the word "donation" when you are getting a lucrative payback.

 

[Bella Vita]

Around the world folks sell body fluids and organs for cash and I suppose one could view eggs the same way but I would tend to agree with dies-l that you ought to talk it over with your pastor and other mature folks in your church.

And I would suggest you don't use the word "donation" when you are getting a lucrative payback.

Sorry but that is the technical term people get paid for sperm donation plasma donation bone marrow donation it is all donating but they all get paid something...

 

[MrJim]

Sorry but that is the technical term people get paid for sperm donation plasma donation bone marrow donation it is all donating but they all get paid something...

Yet when I donate blood to the Red Cross or money to the Cancer Society I get nothing in return. When my wife's aunt donated a kidney for her brother there was no monetary transaction...I think they use the term "donate" to soften the truth of the transaction~~it sounds "nicer" than to say one sold their blood or sperm or other body parts.