Doubting my engagement is the right path

[CitizenxL]

Could God be showing me the path He wants me to take? Before I left for college, I was highly active in my church. I and my pastors all knew that I had been called into the ministry, particularly to teens and mission work. God also gave me the ability and opportunity to ministry through dance. When I left home and went to college, I got lost in the shuffle. I never found a new church and eventually my faith began to backslide. Another strong Christian woman was placed in my life to help guide me back. Only 4 weeks after we became close friends, her calling took her away for ministry with Eddie James. A few months later, she called and said they wanted me to travel with them as well, but I was terrified to leave school. I have a full scholarship and knew if I left that I would lose it. So, I turned them down. A couple years passed and I had fallen back pretty much as far as I possibly could. While I was at my worst, I met a great man whom I quickly fell in love with. He is a truly wonderful person, everything I could ask for. Except for faith. It wasn't an issue at first. We've been together 2 1/2 years now. And we've been engaged for a long time. But, recently I've been being drawn back to my faith. The closer I get to God, the more I realize despite how much I love him, that there are serious issues with our relationship. While all this is going on, I think that God may be showing me the path he wants me on. A good, Christian man, called into the ministry had a class with me last semester. The day I met him, I had a strange feeling that drew me to him. Over time, I feel like God has been telling me, he is on the path I should take. Since I have no church family to seek guidance from, I decided to put this on here to seek prayers and spiritual guidance.

 

[akmom]

I think you will be in for a lifetime of disappointment if you are "unequally yoked" - if you marry someone who does not share your faith.

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV)

 

[Water Cross]

Perhaps God sent you a man that fit your fallen state and now that you're returning to the faith and realizing yourself in the spirit of Christ again, he's sent you a man that is appropriate for that journey. One that won't lead you astray or cause you to fall back because you share the same beliefs.


Follow your heart. You're not married yet. You can leave and look to the man that God may have sent to you to support your return to your faith. Fully supported by someone who is strong in theirs.

akmom was right in reminding you of the scriptures teachings about being unequally yoked with unbelievers.

2 Corinthians 6:14 http://www.esvbible.org/De7.3;Jos23.12;Ezr9.2;Neh13.25;1Co7.39/Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For http://www.esvbible.org/Ep5.7;Ep5.11;1J1.6/what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or http://www.esvbible.org/Ac26.18/what fellowship has light with darkness?

Could God be showing me the path He wants me to take? Before I left for college, I was highly active in my church. I and my pastors all knew that I had been called into the ministry, particularly to teens and mission work. God also gave me the ability and opportunity to ministry through dance. When I left home and went to college, I got lost in the shuffle. I never found a new church and eventually my faith began to backslide. Another strong Christian woman was placed in my life to help guide me back. Only 4 weeks after we became close friends, her calling took her away for ministry with Eddie James. A few months later, she called and said they wanted me to travel with them as well, but I was terrified to leave school. I have a full scholarship and knew if I left that I would lose it. So, I turned them down. A couple years passed and I had fallen back pretty much as far as I possibly could. While I was at my worst, I met a great man whom I quickly fell in love with. He is a truly wonderful person, everything I could ask for. Except for faith. It wasn't an issue at first. We've been together 2 1/2 years now. And we've been engaged for a long time. But, recently I've been being drawn back to my faith. The closer I get to God, the more I realize despite how much I love him, that there are serious issues with our relationship. While all this is going on, I think that God may be showing me the path he wants me on. A good, Christian man, called into the ministry had a class with me last semester. The day I met him, I had a strange feeling that drew me to him. Over time, I feel like God has been telling me, he is on the path I should take. Since I have no church family to seek guidance from, I decided to put this on here to seek prayers and spiritual guidance.

 

[Brandon25]

I would first like to mention that I am disappointed with how some people view engagement. As if you just leave whenever you want and there is nothing to it. Engagement is a promise before God to Marry the person you've chosen. To break this promise is a sin. That is why it's extremely important that you understand fully what it means to be engaged before you say "yes" to it. Now with all of that said, I honestly believe the engagement promise is only valid if both are followers of Christ.

Now you made this decision with this man in a time of your life where you are spiritually lukewarm, and with a man who is a unbeliever. In my opinion, I think you should take some time and grow in the Lord and consider prayerfully what God would have you do. Seek Godly counsel, and consider 2 Corinthians 6:14 that was mentioned by Water Cross.

Mathew 6:33 is a good verse to

 

[Tammy]

I believe you should break your engagement and rededicate your life to God. It is true, getting engaged is a serious commitment, but it is NOT the same as being married. To follow thru, and marry this man, would be the biggest mistake of your life. You made a huge mistake in becoming engaged to him in the first place, and to seal that mistake by marrying him could be fatal to your soul. God is merciful, and He will forgive you for becoming engaged to him. I can tell that your conscience is really bothering you, you know you are walking down a path that is leading you away from God. Don't do it! Come back to God, better to live your life alone and single and be right with God than to be the rest of your life with a person who is not wanting to serve the Lord. "How can two walk together except they be agreed?" I pray you don't delay.

 

[Honest Al]

I think you will be in for a lifetime of disappointment if you are "unequally yoked" - if you marry someone who does not share your faith.

Hi Citizen,

Akmom is right Citizen, and I hope you won't let anyone or anything (especially your own heart or emotions) convince you otherwise.

You said that you realize "there are serious issues" in your relationship with him. Marriage is far too important a step to make a mistake on. I have to agree with Tammy (not because she's my wife , but because she's right), you would be making the biggest mistake of your life.

A right marriage is a most wonderful, wonderful thing--it affects so many aspects of your life and future. On the other hand a bad marriage can be sad beyond description--also affecting so many aspects of your life and future. (One quick example: We're involved with a woman who finally decided she could no longer take it and left her husband a few weeks ago. She's been married 30 years. She told Tammy the other day that when she went to bed last night it was so nice (but strange) to lay down and not be all stressed out--she said it was the first time in nearly 30 years.) How terribly sad.

One more thing: This lady, and her husband, are, and always have been, professing Christians. So... just be very certain that when you finally do meet the right person that he truly is the right person.

God Bless, and we'll be praying for you.

"In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." {Proverbs 3:6}

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." {Matthew 6:33}

"I have come so that they may have life. I want them to have it in the fullest possible way." {John 10:10 CJB, NIrV}

 

[JojotheBeloved]

Pray like mad!!! Be as confidant in God's direction as possible. And then make your choice. Only you can know where God is calling you, and sometimes we don't even know that very well. Take a leap of faith - because either way that will be what it is - a leap of faith. You could have faith that God will give you a new and better relationship, but there is risk that the guy you've spoken of is not the guy you will end up with (or you may not be married to anyone at all). You could also have faith that God will lead both you and your current fiancé together in a better way, but there's a risk there too that you'll both end up without a strong relationship with God. Either way there are risks involved. So pray like your life depends on it and take a leap of faith one way or the other. But make sure God is most important in your life. God will be faithful to you.