- Aug 6, 2018
- 11
- 16
- 40
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Single
So, I'm a person who has asked for God's help and forgiveness, and who would call themselves a believer. However, I don't think much progress has been made in my life as far as walking with Jesus goes. I've never joined a church. I've never been baptized. And I don't read the Bible much. I'm also not a very good person nor do I follow the commands of Jesus. However, I've always felt a tug towards God and I do feel bad for not following Him, although I feel like that is starting to die.
I'm 33 years old and don't have much going for me. I work in retail, but I'm currently in college pursuing a bachelor's degree in computer science. I'm also living with my parents to save money.
Well, just recently, a woman who I was with for 3 years and who I lived with for 2 ended things with me. I'm not exactly sure why that happened, but I can cite numerous reasons. I guess that doesn't really matter. It's one of those things where she just became fed up with me and stopped feeling love for me. She meant a lot to me though and I still love her. Towards the end of the relationship, she started hanging out with a guy at work and the rest is history. No need to go over that. By the way, I'm no angel in this relationship. This post isn't meant to pile on my ex or anything. I forgive her--or at least I've been trying. I hope she forgives me too. I'm just in a lot of pain.
My ex believed in God, I think--but she was wishy-washy with it. However, she never seemed as interested as me. And she didn't seem interested in pursuing a Christian life. This is because of some things that happened to her earlier in life that made her question the existence of God or if He does exist, His moral nature. Regardless, I loved this girl a lot and I wanted to even have children with her.
I don't have many friends and my family is dysfunctional to the point where they can offer little to no support and even make things worse. So where to I go? At first, I cried out to God and I went to church, on my own, for the first time. I've been to church before but I've never went to a sermon on Sunday, by myself, under my own volition. I was looking for something. It was a good experience. I've also been asking God to take away my sadness and anger. But then I slipped, like I usually do. I hooked up with a girl at work, soon after my ex told me she didn't think we should talk anymore. I used this girl at work. I'm garbage for that. Before I did anything with this woman, I told her my situation and my intentions, and she didn't seem to mind. Afterwards, she did seem to mind. I don't blame her. I told her we both made a mistake and that I'm sorry. Then I took a long walk and cried out in sadness and anger at myself, for using this woman. I don't want to do that stuff anymore. I just want the pain to go away. So, I asked God to forgive me and to change my heart. I've asked this before, but it never seems to work. I'm hoping this time it happens.
Will you guys pray for me? Do you have any advice? Do you think everything happens for a reason? Will God help me? Please help...
I'm 33 years old and don't have much going for me. I work in retail, but I'm currently in college pursuing a bachelor's degree in computer science. I'm also living with my parents to save money.
Well, just recently, a woman who I was with for 3 years and who I lived with for 2 ended things with me. I'm not exactly sure why that happened, but I can cite numerous reasons. I guess that doesn't really matter. It's one of those things where she just became fed up with me and stopped feeling love for me. She meant a lot to me though and I still love her. Towards the end of the relationship, she started hanging out with a guy at work and the rest is history. No need to go over that. By the way, I'm no angel in this relationship. This post isn't meant to pile on my ex or anything. I forgive her--or at least I've been trying. I hope she forgives me too. I'm just in a lot of pain.
My ex believed in God, I think--but she was wishy-washy with it. However, she never seemed as interested as me. And she didn't seem interested in pursuing a Christian life. This is because of some things that happened to her earlier in life that made her question the existence of God or if He does exist, His moral nature. Regardless, I loved this girl a lot and I wanted to even have children with her.
I don't have many friends and my family is dysfunctional to the point where they can offer little to no support and even make things worse. So where to I go? At first, I cried out to God and I went to church, on my own, for the first time. I've been to church before but I've never went to a sermon on Sunday, by myself, under my own volition. I was looking for something. It was a good experience. I've also been asking God to take away my sadness and anger. But then I slipped, like I usually do. I hooked up with a girl at work, soon after my ex told me she didn't think we should talk anymore. I used this girl at work. I'm garbage for that. Before I did anything with this woman, I told her my situation and my intentions, and she didn't seem to mind. Afterwards, she did seem to mind. I don't blame her. I told her we both made a mistake and that I'm sorry. Then I took a long walk and cried out in sadness and anger at myself, for using this woman. I don't want to do that stuff anymore. I just want the pain to go away. So, I asked God to forgive me and to change my heart. I've asked this before, but it never seems to work. I'm hoping this time it happens.
Will you guys pray for me? Do you have any advice? Do you think everything happens for a reason? Will God help me? Please help...